Instead, I turn my back to him, step back onto the dock, and walk away.
Chapter Fourteen
Ivy
“Can I borrow your car?”
Sierra looks up from the book she’s reading in the big armchair in the living room.
“I’m going to go down to the train station and grab Blaine.”
Sierra raises a brow. “He finally get on one?”
I scowl.
Yet another reason I’ve been in a sour mood the entire afternoon and evening. Because if running into Silas Hard, again, wasn’t fun enough, my boyfriend is apparently incapable of making a damn train to come see me.
She puts the book into her lap. “Look, I’m sure he just had stuff to do that he got caught up in.” She shrugs her shoulders. “You know how you get when you’re sucked into those conference calls with marketing or whoever.”
“He missed four trains today,” I mutter out, pouting.
Sierra purses her lips. “Hey, you okay?”
“Fine.”
I haven’t told her about bumping into Silas earlier. I’m also trying to convince myself that doing so has had zero effect on me. I’m trying tell myself that the sole reason for my sour mood is Blaine missing trains, not Silas bringing up the past.
Sierra nods. “Keys are in my purse by the front door.”
“Thanks.”
By the time the parking lot is totally empty at the train station across town, I know I haven’t somehow missed him.
He’s just not here.
I can feel the heat rising in my face as I dial his number for the eighth time in as many minutes, letting it ring and ring until it goes to voicemail. Again.
I slump in the seat, blowing air out through my lips and drumming my fingers across the steering wheel. I glance down at my dark phone, as if watching it will miraculously get Blaine to call and let me know that, yes, I have somehow missed him. Yes, he’s waiting at home with my whole family, waiting for me to get there so he can tell me everything is normal, and calm, and on track, and that the past is going to stay there.
But it doesn’t. I check my call settings for the third time, to make sure I’m getting service or on the right network or whatever. But I know at this point I’m just fishing in the dark.
The train’s long gone, and Blaine’s not here.
I drive in silence back across Shelter Harbor to my parents’ place, letting the streetlight trail across the windshield and my thoughts trail across my mind until I pull the car back into their driveway.
Then the phone rings.
And I know I should let him wait. I should hold off until the very last ring to pick up. But I of course answer halfway through the first damn ring.
“Hey!”
Blaine clears his throat. “Hey.”
“Did you miss the train?” I hate how eager, how needing my voice is.
There’s a silence for another few seconds before he answers.
“No, Ivy.”
I let out a sigh. “Oh my God, I can’t believe I missed you then! I’m so sorry!” I grin, reaching for the keys. “Hang on, I’ll come back to the station and get-“
“No, Ivy, I mean I didn’t miss the train because I never took it.”
I blink in the darkness of the car, my brow wrinkling. “What?”
“Look, Ivy-”
“On purpose?” My voice squeaks.
“Uh, yeah.”
I shake my head, frowning and trying to wrap my head around this. “Blaine, if you didn’t want to come out here, you just had to tell me. I mean, my parents really want to see you, and of course I want to see you, but if you aren’t feeling it, you just have to-”
“Ivy, I’ve been thinking.”
I freeze, a sinking feeling in my stomach.
I swallow the thick lump that forms in my throat. “About?”
Blaine sighs heavily. “About us.”
The sinking feeling starts to burn hot.
“What do you mean?” I almost whisper into the phone.
“Look, babe-”
“What are you saying, Blaine?” I suddenly find my volume, and my voice ratchets up in loudness, a buzzing sound starting to ring in my ears.
“Look, I-” he groans. “Babe, I just don’t know if I’m ready for the life you want.”
My eyes start to narrow as the anger starts to bloom inside. “And what life is that, exactly?”
“Ivy, I don’t know, I’m just-” He take a beat. “I’m just not ready to settle down I guess.”