"I wanted to kick my screen. Turn here and then keep going straight. It looked like the reporters caught her returning home from some place."
"I had no idea she was there. I wonder if my dad is."
"There's construction ahead so take the ramp. Your dad doesn't seem as mean as your mom. It's clear, you can get over. I always remembered him as being nice. Pass this truck. You didn't see much of him while you grew up, did you?"
"No he wasn't around. Lois was my parent."
"Chloe, just because someone has a kid, doesn't mean they should be a parent. I'm sorry to say this, but you got stuck in that kind of situation. Get off up here at the exit. Even though your mom and dad are the way they are right now, doesn't mean they'll always be. You have to find that fine line between acceptance and hope. Go down here."
"Wait we're going back to my apartment?"
"If you keep too much hope, you'll be let down constantly. If you stay angry, you'll destroy yourself."
"I can't help but feel the way I do."
"But if you accept the way they are and just live your life, no matter what happens, you'll be okay because you know you have people that'll do anything for you. Congratulations, love, you just made it through the intersection where you had your accident, and you're okay."
Chloe smiled and finished driving to her apartment while Becky turned up the radio. The girls sang at the top of their lungs.
"Your mother got rid of your Jeep, so shopping tomorrow with me to buy a new one?"
"Yeah, shopping tomorrow with you to buy a new one. But no Bob."
"No Bob."
∞ ∞ ∞ ∞
Chloe drove in her new red Jeep with ease. The first several times behind the wheel, Becky rode with her. She wasn't even going to attempt driving to the grocery store alone. She was definitely more cautious about driving through green lights, and waited a little bit longer before leaving a red light, but she was enjoying being out of the apartment when she wanted. She'd begun picking up shifts for Sherry, and stopped by to say hello to her even when she wasn't working. Conner walked down to visit once in a while, and she liked bringing him lunch a few times a week, but everyone gathered around Chloe when the holidays came. Even though her small circle of friends were like family, they worried she wouldn't handle the season well.
The Burlington's had stayed in Michigan, not because of Sylvia, but Earl had refused to leave. He wasn't doing much of anything these days, especially communicating with his wife. Earl knew it was just a matter of time before his daughter came to ask him why. Talking to Sylvia about anything other than what she wanted was exhausting. When he told his wife he was thinking about retiring, and how nice it was to be home, and how they should call Chloe to come over for the holidays, she shut herself in the bedroom for three days.
Chloe had a pleasant time and joined in on all the many festivities that people planned for her, and they didn't argue anymore when Chloe spoiled them. For Christmas, she had a catering company deliver food for the staff at the hospital that cared for her. Everything seemed great. But it wasn't, and no one was more aware of that than Matthew. Chloe had to confront her parents, but a face to face meeting wasn't going to happen. Truth be told, she probably wasn't welcomed on the estate and would be stopped by the guards. He knew she couldn't handle any more rejection from them, so a letter seemed to be the best choice, and then she could stick it in the mail. All he could do was give her the suggestion and tell her why it would be good for her. Writing it would be up to Chloe.
When Matthew saw her start to spiral downward, he'd talk about the wedding and how beautiful she'd look. That always got her spirits up. They set a date for April and booked a church. Becky threw her a beautiful bridal shower, and all the guys attended too. The day after the shower, Chloe wouldn't get out of bed.
∞ ∞ ∞ ∞
She had barely been sleeping. There were shower gifts still on the floor in boxes that should have been opened weeks ago, but she lacked the energy and desire to open them. At one point, Chloe was good at plastering on a fake smile, acting joyful and happy even when she wanted nothing more than to break down in tears. But ever since that blasted news report of her mother lying, she'd lost the ability to hide anything. The wedding shower was really nice, even with just a handful of people there. Chloe maintained her smile throughout that evening, but she lay awake in bed that night knowing her mother had chosen not to come. She overheard Matthew and Becky talking one day about how Becky invited her mother to the shower. The news report confirmed she was still in Michigan, which removed all excuses.
Chloe looked down at the writing tablet and pen that Matthew had left on the dresser. She knew she'd have no trouble writing her thoughts and feelings down in a letter to her parents, but there was no way in hell she could mail it. If she upset them with her words, they'd never come into her life. Not only that, but her mother wouldn't bother opening it, let alone reading it. If anything, she'd give it to the staff and ask for a quick summary, or have one of them respond to the letter. But she had to write it; not for her parents, but for herself. Chloe reached over on the nightstand and grabbed the box of tissues. Lying on her stomach with just the light coming in through the window, Chloe put the pen to the paper, and as the tears rolled down her cheeks, she wrote.
Matthew peeked in the door to check on Chloe, and without a sound he immediately closed the door and went back in the living room. From the look on her face, the wads of tissues, and the quick pace she was writing at, he knew she was composing the letter. When Chloe came out of the bedroom, her face was red, but she seemed to be carrying less emotional baggage on her small shoulders. He didn't bring up the letter, and neither did she.
"I'm kind of hungry. Do you want to order Chinese or something? Ask your dad if he'd like to join us. I haven't seen too much of him lately and I miss our visits."
"I bet he'd love it. We always order the same thing, so why don't you call, and after I bring Pops down here, I'll take off and pick it up."
"Thank you for suggesting I write that letter. I'm never going to mail it, but it helped me to put what was spinning around in my head down on paper."
"I love you, Chloe, and just know that you can tell me anything. You never have to be embarrassed or ashamed of your parent's behavior. They need some serious help. If you can't sleep and you have things on your mind, wake me up. If I'm at work, call me. I'm there for you, sweetheart."
Chloe kissed his mouth slowly and wrapped her arms around him. She knew Matthew would move mountains for her, and she wanted to share everything in her life with him. But the mere thought of telling him the raw, bitter truth of what her parents were making her feel, describing in detail everything that was stabbing her heart, was more than she could bear.
∞ ∞ ∞ ∞
Spring was just around the corner, and Becky called Chloe almost daily to ask if she wanted to go look at gowns. The wedding was in four weeks and they'd done nothing to prepare. She brought over magazines and pointed to dresses that would look so cute on Chloe's delicate frame, but the only response she'd get was "That looks nice." Trying to get her friend to open up wasn't working. Finally, Becky went to a bridal shop and picked up six dresses and brought them over. She laid out each one, and after an hour of arguing, Chloe picked up a dress and tried it on.
"You look so gorgeous in that! Do you like it?"
"Sure. We can get this one." Chloe didn't even smile. She wanted Becky to take the dresses back to the store.
"Sweetie, this is your big day. You should wear the gown of your dreams, not just pick one to get it over with. Here, try on this."
"Let's just get the first one. It fits fine; we won't have to get it altered."
"Chloe, talk to me."
"Actually, I was going to go take a quick nap before Matthew comes home. Take my card out of my purse over there and buy it when you return the others." Without waiting for a response, she walked out of the room and closed her bedroom door.
Becky returned all the dresses to the store. She wanted to talk to Matthew while he was out of earshot of Chloe. After she handed the dresses to the sales lady, she went to the parking lot and sat in her car.
"I'm really worried about her, Matthew. The wedding is in less than a month, and she doesn't even have a gown picked out. She loves you to pieces, I know this for a fact, so you're not the cause. This has everything to do with her parents. A mother is supposed to be out shopping for a wedding gown with her daughter. A mother is supposed to be helping to plan the big day. Her mother is here, but missing all at the same time. I'd go shake the crap out of Sylvia, but the last thing the guards would allow is me back on her property. I'm trying to get her to talk about it. I know she's sad and everything, but is there something I don't know?"
"She wrote a letter to her parents but didn't want to mail it. I don't know what I'm going to do. Something has to happen though or there won't be a wedding, and I'm afraid there won't be a Chloe. She's very depressed. I've respected her privacy regarding that letter, but now I think it's best if I read it."
"Part of me wants to argue with you because she wanted that letter to be private. But I think it's time we found out."