"Stay home in Tampa."
Her eyes widened. "I could never do that, Landon. You had to know I could never watch you walk away and be okay with it. I was devastated. I had to follow you. I had to make this right."
Austin cleared his throat. "Sorry to interrupt. I'm going to … head out and get some lunch with Patrick. Let me know if you need anything."
"Thanks, Austin," I said with a sigh. I waved at him as he practically bolted out of the house to avoid the conversation that I so desperately wished to back out of.
As soon as Austin shut the door, Miranda reached for my hands. "I'm so, so sorry, Landon. I am. Truly. You have to know how sorry I am about all of this."
I pulled my hands back from her. "I don't actually. You seemed like you meant what you said."
"You know I didn't. I was frustrated and worried about you when you heard me on the phone with Janice. It's not every day that we have to face the news from your doctor that you might never be able to play golf again."
The breath left my lungs in a whoosh, and I took a step back. Even hearing those words out of her mouth made my stomach clench and my body seize. I'd tried not to think those exact words. I'd tried to block out the doctor telling me that I'd reinjured my back in the same spot as before. I'd tried to forget him telling me that, if I didn't stop, if I didn't take time off to heal, I would never golf again. And, even then, there were no guarantees.
"No, I'd hoped to never have to hear that," I said. "But I also didn't expect for you to tell Janice that you didn't want to have kids after we'd spent the last year doing everything possible to make that happen, then blow up on me when I asked you about it."
Tears welled in her eyes, and within seconds, she was sniveling into her hands. Her shoulders were shaking. Her body was racked with sobs. The composed woman that I knew disappeared.
"I'm sorry," she blubbered. "I'm so sorry. It was a joke between girls. I swear."
"Well, it wasn't a funny joke considering we lost a child and I've catered to your every whim the last year in an attempt to make it right. Then you tell her that you don't want a kid to end up like a Wright so you're not having one. Excuse me if I don't think that's funny."
"It was stress," she went on. "I know I shouldn't have said it. I didn't mean it. Everything I said was me being worried about your career and came out all wrong. It wasn't anything else. I want you to get better. I want you to do what you love again. You know that you're my first priority. Always. And I flew all this way to make it right."
Her eyes came up to meet mine. They were bloodshot, and tears streamed down her face.
"Landon, let me make this right," she gasped out.
My phone buzzed in my pocket, and I knew exactly who that was. I knew where I was supposed to be and what I was supposed to be doing. But here was my wife, my callous and hardened wife, laying it all out for me. I was so tired of all the shit that we had been through. I didn't know if I believed her when she had she had been joking or that my career was her first priority, but I'd have to be a different man, a worse man, to not hear her out.
"One more chance, Miranda," I told her. "Just one and if I ever feel this way again. I'm gone. Do you understand?"
She nodded fiercely. "You never will. I promise."
Six
Heidi
Going to Café J to have brunch with Landon was an idiotic idea. I knew that down to my bones, yet I couldn't say no to him. I'd tried, but when he had pleaded with me, I had been a goner.
There was never going to be a real relationship between us. I wouldn't come between him and Miranda. I wouldn't be that kind of girl.
But, still, I hoped.
I hoped for the day when he would tell me that he wasn't just separated, but that he'd finalized a divorce with Miranda.
It was a bad, cruel thing to hope for.
Asking for a marriage to be ruined was bad Karma, and I needed all the good vibes I could get in my life. I'd had enough hard times, and I knew better.
Still … it made my chest ache to think about that one kiss. And, even though he'd been drunk the night before, my blood had heated when he asked me if I liked to be on top. It had taken all the willpower in my body not to give in and forget about being a responsible adult for once.
Yet here I was, driving out to see him.
As if I honestly believed we could go back to being friends after that kiss.
He'd cut off all contact with me because our conversations had gone from him finally having someone he could talk to in his life to deep, emotional conversations. To talking late into the night. To wanting to wake up and call him. To wanting to talk to him every day just to tell him about my day. To wanting to fly out there and see his smile to match the laugh I could draw out of him.