But his relationship with Jeffery was too complicated to deal with that day. He didn't want to think about it and get himself stressed out on his first day home. He opened a small Gucci bag and emptied the contents on the bed. The Gucci bags had been a gift from Jeffery, too. He'd given them to Evan two Christmases ago before they'd left for Switzerland. Evan would have been happy with anything Jeffery had given him. It didn't have to be designer bags. But Jeffery had a way of tossing money around in a vulgar way without giving it a second thought. And when he did this Evan knew there was no use arguing with him.
Evan smiled at the personal items on his bed: a blow dryer, underwear, hair product, and a few other toiletries. The other small bag contained a few pairs of jeans, sweatpants, and T-shirts. He could have packed it all in a shopping bag and still had room left.
The room felt stuffy, as if no one had lived there for years. As he moved to the other side of the bed to open the window he heard a knock on the door and he stopped short. He wasn't expecting anyone. As far as he knew no one knew he was home yet other than his closest friends. He heard a louder knock, almost a bang. Then he heard Jeffery's deep voice say, "Are you in there?" and his chest caved in.
He couldn't pretend he wasn't home, so he took a quick breath and went back into the living room. By that time Jeffery had begun to bang on the door and shout his name aloud. Jeffery wasn't the kind of man who liked to be kept waiting. But the moment Evan unlocked the door his cell phone rang. He'd left it on the dining table when he'd pulled it out of his jacket pocket.
He opened the door, stared at his husband for a moment, and said, "Come in." Then he walked over to the table and answered his phone without bothering to look at the caller ID first.
"Hey, Dad. Are you home now?" Evan sent Jeffery a glance. Jeffery was standing in the middle of the living room watching him. He nodded at Jeffery and said, "Hey, Kenny. Yes, I'm home. Hell, it's so good to hear your voice. I was just about to call and leave you a message. I figured you were in class now."
When Jeffery heard that Evan was talking to their son, he smiled and sat down on the sofa. Evan figured he'd come right from his office on Wall Street. He wore a gray suit, a starched white shirt, and a navy blue tie. He was one of those men who looked just as good in a suit as he did jeans and a T-shirt.
"I'm between classes right now," Kenny said. "I wanted to see if you're okay." He went to a private school uptown near Jeffery's townhouse. He'd just entered his freshman year and he seemed to be well adjusted in spite of the fact that his parents weren't living together.
"I'm fine," Evan said. "I'm really doing okay and I don't want you to worry." Sometimes it was more like Evan was the child and Kenny was the parent. They related to each other more like good friends than father and son. Jeffery and Evan had adopted Kenny when he was seven years old, right after they'd committed to each other. This was before gay marriage in New York had been legal, and right before having children had become the ultimate chic thing to do for gay men. Jeffery had insisted on adoption. At the time, he'd said he'd always wanted to be a father and he wanted to do it while he was still young. Although Evan had been apprehensive about being a parent back them, he now realized it was the one single decision he'd made in his life so far that had been worthwhile. He couldn't imagine what his life would be like without Kenny.
"Good, because I want you to listen to me read tonight," Kenny said.
"Read?" Evan asked. He glanced at the sofa and Jeffery shrugged.
"I wrote a short story for my English class and tonight is parent-teacher night at school. Each department is doing something different. The English department has kids doing readings, and I'm doing one."
Evan felt a surge of panic deep in his stomach. "Oh, I'm not sure, Kenny. I just got home. I look like a mess and I can't promise anything." He didn't want to face people this soon, especially other parents and teachers in a school environment where everything always seemed so proper and upstanding.
"Dad, you have to come, seriously. I need you there. You're a writer and I've been telling everyone about you. I'm also scared to death. I've never done a reading before."
"Oh, God," Evan said. He hated being put on the spot this way. But there was nothing he wouldn't do for his child. He'd made a silent pledge to himself the first night Kenny had spent with them ten years earlier. He's tucked him into bed and waited for him to fall asleep. He sat there watching him sleep for more than an hour. Before he got up and went to his own bedroom that night, he bent down, kissed his son on the cheek, and said, "I will always put you first."