“You were…” He couldn’t even it say it.
“Raped. R-A-P-E-D. I was forced into a room by a group of assholes in college and raped again and again and again before they got tired of me and left. I think about it daily, and I hate myself. I was raped. No one knew. Not you, not Evelyn. Not my even my parents.”
“But you told Melody?” He was trying to stay calm, but he was shaking as much as I was.
“She makes you talk!” I said. “You look into her eyes and you know she can walk into the darkest part of your mind and still manage to smile for a photo. I don’t know why I told her. I was trying to bow to the fucking queen like you said. I wanted her to understand! She did. She understood better than anyone else. She found one of them.”
“I could have done that!” he roared at me. “I would have gladly done worse than that five years ago when I married you! I don’t understand why you didn’t tell me!”
“Because I was ashamed, because I wanted to deny it, because you would have killed them.” I stopped, thinking about the last part. “I…I…needed to kill them myself.”
That was what I needed.
We sat there, tense, for what seemed like hours, just staring at the house.
“Next time, bash their heads in while they’re alive and then shoot them,” Neal whispered. “The longer they suffer, the better.” He took my hand again.
The stupid tears wouldn’t go away.
“Okay,” was all I could think to say.
“And I will be there when we find the others.”
“Okay.”
“I’m staying. I love you, and you can tell me anything, always. I’m going to be there, and Melody can go screw herself.”
“I love you too. And I’m going to tell her you said that.”
He paled, and I wanted to have that effect on men one day…even my husband.
THREE
“You should have died when I killed you.”
—John le Carré
MELODY
“What are you hiding from me, Liam?” I asked, as we danced in the middle of the ballroom.
He pulled me closer to him. “I could say the same for you, love.”
“True, but I’m discussing those secrets with family, not outsiders.” I searched around for the blonde he had spoken to, but she had disappeared and no one else seemed to notice or even care. She wasn’t somebody with title or fame, but either had or knew something of worth to be able to speak with Liam privately.
“Are you jealous, love?” He squeezed my ass. “Because you shouldn’t be. I love you and you alone.”
“That’s the fifth ‘I love you’ you’ve said tonight. I’m really going to kill you once I find out what you did, aren’t I?” I said calmly. I would remain so until he gave me a reason not to be. I truly wanted to beat the shit out of him until he told me, but the sick fuck would more than likely enjoy it.
He sighed. “You, love, may just kill me when I tell you.”
“Liam…”
He kissed me so hard and passionately, he all but lifted me from the ground.
“After the gala,” he whispered as his eyes begged me to drop it, “okay? After the gala?”
I didn’t like this. I didn’t like this at all. Whatever he was hiding, that made him act like this—like I was a time bomb waiting to explode—was probably going to make me do just that.
“Do you ever wish you could be like them?” he asked, nodding at the political interns helping with Senators Colemen’s campaign. They were all around the same age, if not older, than us.
“You mean do I wish my life was filled with nothing but exams and school, getting a degree I won’t use for a job I hate, and student loans I can’t pay off? A life of binge drinking, and horrible sex that I think is good because of the binge drinking?” I looked them over. “No, I don’t wish I could be them. It sucks to be them. That’s why they’re here, hoping that if they stand close enough, and say the right things, they have a chance to escape their shitty lives.”
“Don’t hold back, love, it’s not in your nature.” He laughed, spinning me around before bringing me back to him. “You’ve never wished your life was simple?”
“It is. I get what I want and if you stand in my way, I will wipe you off the face of the earth, then go after everyone who shares your DNA. Simple.” I smiled.
He smirked as well. “Now you’re just trying to turn me on.”
“You’re always waiting to be turned on.” Proving my point, I pushed my breasts up against him and I could feel him hardening against my stomach.