The Unlikely Lady(70)
Garrett cleared his throat. “I know we need to have a talk first, a serious one, and I—”
“No.” Jane couldn’t think about that part. It was too much. She only wanted to live in this magical place for one more night. “Not tonight. Let’s not talk tonight.”
“Fine, tomorrow morning then. But you’ll come to my room, tonight?”
Jane took a deep breath. She wanted it. She wanted him. She was a spinster, after all. What did she care about her useless virginity? The only thing that concerned her was the danger of becoming heavy with child.
“Garrett, if we— I don’t want to have a baby.”
“Don’t worry.” He whispered into her mouth. “I have something for that.”
She nodded.
He kissed her again. “Jane, have you ever?”
She shook her head. “No.”
He traced her cheekbones with his fingers. “Of course not.” He seemed tender, so tender. “Don’t worry. It’s going to hurt … a bit, at first, but I can make it good for you. I promise.”
“I know it’s going to hurt, Upton, I’ve read about it.”
He couldn’t help his smile. “It’s just like you to think you know all about something you’ve never done before.”
She laughed. “I’ll have to get away from Mama. Perhaps I’ll tell her I’m going to bed sick.” She smiled. “I must have eaten whatever Mrs. Bunbury ate.”
Garrett pressed his forehead to hers. “Perfect. Come after the ball. Two o’clock?” he whispered, kissing her once more.
Jane rubbed her nose against his. “I want to … I do, but…”
“Think about it. If you’re not there, I’ll know you changed your mind.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
Jane hurried back down to the ballroom. Her belly was performing somersaults, but a thrill shot through her. She and Garrett were going to make love. She wanted it. She wanted it very much. It would complicate things to be sure, but it would also be the perfect opportunity for him to tell her he loved her. Surely he would. Wouldn’t he? He’d mentioned having a serious talk in the morning, that had to be about love and marriage. A man like Garrett would never take his cousin’s friend to bed without knowing the consequences of such an act.
As Jane made her way slowly down the stairs still favoring her ankle, the clocks chimed one. An entire hour to wait, an eternity.
Garrett returned to the ballroom as well. He smiled and laughed and danced with Cass and wished her well and joked with his cousin. Aunt Mary had already retired, but the rest of the friends enjoyed themselves, while Lucy noticeably dodged her parents.
The entire time, Jane couldn’t keep her gaze from Garrett. He was so handsome. So handsome and he would be … Ooh, he would be touching her in a little while. Touching her everywhere and anywhere and making her feel all of those amazing things he’d made her feel before … and more.
Jane bit her lip. How would she ever tell Lucy and Cass about this? She couldn’t not tell Lucy and Cass, but not tonight. Tonight she wanted to keep it to herself. A special secret only she and Garrett would share.
When Garrett turned and winked at her minutes later before he left the ballroom, Jane nearly came undone. Oh, she desperately wanted to tell Lucy and Cass.
Thankfully, Jane’s mother had retired as well. She’d insisted that Jane stay and have a good time dancing, with Lucy as her chaperone. Apparently, Jane’s earlier admittance that she’d met some wonderful people had given her mother hope. Jane had never before wanted to stay at a party longer than her mother; no doubt the woman had been saying a prayer of thanksgiving as she hurried from the room.
Jane took a deep breath. She counted ten. She would go upstairs and change into her night rail. No, upon second thought, her night rail wasn’t exactly enticing. Oh, she was clearly not prepared for midnight assignations with gentlemen at house parties. What self-respecting bluestocking spinster was? Very well. She’d leave on her chemise and cover herself with her dressing gown. Yes. Perfect.
“Cass, dear. I’m going up to bed,” she said to her friend, hugging her closely.
“Frankly, I’m surprised you made it this long. And we’re not far behind you,” Cass said, grinning back and returning her hug. “I love you, Janie. I hope your ankle feels better soon.”
“I love you too, Cass. I’m so happy for you and for Julian. As for my ankle, I’m only glad a litter wasn’t involved.”
“Don’t think I wouldn’t have arranged it,” Cass replied.
“I have no doubt.” Jane took her leave of Julian, Lucy, and Derek and made her way out of the ballroom and up the stairs to her room. By the time she arrived at her door, she was trembling with nerves. She rang for Eloise, who quickly helped divest her of her gown. Jane made it a point to dismiss the maid before she removed her chemise. She took a step over to the wardrobe and grabbed her dressing gown. She clutched it in both hands, staring at herself in the full-length mirror. She looked altogether different in her chemise. In fact, she’d never exactly studied herself this way before, with her hair down and her feet bare. Would Garrett think she was pretty enough? Would her naked body be acceptable to him? Would he think her thighs were too plump? Her backside too round? She’d never cared what anyone thought about her appearance before, but tonight she cared. She cared deeply.