The Unfortunates(26)

“Go, fuck and become useless.”

With a stiff nod, I step past him and into the house. I chew the inside of my lip to stop from crying. I don’t want anyone to see me cry. It’s not because I’m embarrassed… I don’t want to cry because I don’t want anyone to ignore me. I don’t want to be reminded that no one cares if I’m happy or sad. I fold my arms over my chest and hold myself as I bypass my room and stroll up the hallway towards the stairs that lead to Master Kade’s room. I inhale, count to three, and then exhale. This could be a good thing… who knows; maybe if I give myself to him he can’t give me to someone else. It’s a stupid thought, but one nonetheless. They taught us how to conform, but now I’m teaching myself how to survive.

And that’s exactly what I’m doing, surviving.



∞



My knees sink into the soft mattress and I keep my eyes on the door, waiting for Master Kade to arrive. I don’t want him to show up. I want him to party all night and pass out in a bush somewhere—anywhere as long as it’s not here in this room, alone with me. A cool breeze blows in from the far window behind me and brushes across my naked back. I shiver and rest on my heels, with my hands behind my back—the way I was taught. A second later, I hear the handle rattle and it sends my heart through my chest. My entire body begins to shake and my palms sweat. I think I’m going to throw up. I swallow hard. I’m going to beg Master Kade to have sex with me and then I’m going to throw up all over him. This is not going to end well.

The door swings open and in steps Master Kade, loosening his tie. With an exhale, he shuts the door and leans against it. Carefully, I inhale and Kade’s entire body stiffens. Slowly, he turns his head. The only light I have is the low burning fire at the opposite end of the room. His dark, impure eyes rake me. I can almost feel them drag over every inch of my exposed, virgin flesh. They drag up over my thighs and stop at the sweet spot between my legs. A few seconds later, he looks at my flat stomach, generous breasts, and finally, my face.

“What are you doing?” He asks the question with caution… like I’m a venomous animal.

I want to tell him Vince put me up to this, that he threatened me with rape if I don’t go through with it. Instead, I angle my head and quirk my lips.

“I’m here for you, Master Kade… if you’ll have me.”

He straightens his posture and turns his large body in my direction. His movements are robotic, as if he’s being controlled only by the flesh in his pants, not his brain. He stalks toward me—each footstep seemingly more predatory than the last. He stops when his knees hit the side of his bed and he waits, staring at me with lusty, hooded eyes. My heart is in my throat, threatening to beat its way into my mouth as I rise up off my heels and inch closer to him.

“Will you have me?” I whisper. I let my hands press against his hard chest and trail along the crisp fabric to his shoulders. My hands move with skill in order to avoid an unthinkable punishment. Without permission, I kiss Kade’s bottom lip and he makes no move to push it further. Hope blooms in my chest. Please, dismiss me.

“This is what you want?” he asks against my mouth. No.

I pull back and see the suspicion in his eyes. No. My eyes begin to swim and I can’t see as they become misty. No. I quickly blink back tears, keeping my hands on Kade.

“Yes.”

No.

In one swift rough move, he cups me between my legs, letting a finger slip between my creases. I gasp and instinctively squeeze my legs shut as my entire body goes rigid. I don’t like this.

“You’re lying,” he growls.

He removes his hand and shoves me backwards. As I fall, he dives onto the bed and his hard, heavy body pins me to the mattress. I can’t move. I pant for air and struggle against him, trying desperately to break free. Panic builds. It restricts my chest and blurs my vision. I thrash my head from side to side, but it does nothing to help. I can barely wiggle my toes!

“Please,” I beg, my voice sounding far away. “I don’t like—I can’t breathe—I can’t move!”

His large hand grabs my face, keeping it in one place. “That’s the point.”

My throat fills with heavy stones and I choke on a sob. Hot tears burn down the side of my face and into my hair. I squeeze my eyes shut, unwilling to look into the black ones above me. I try to inhale and barely fill a quarter of a lung. Panic kicks in again, multiplying tenfold.

“I can’t breathe! Kaden, please!”

His body stiffens against mine and his hand tightens on my face. I wince and push my head into the bed to get away from the pain.