The Unexpected Duchess(86)

“I wanted to tell you that I ended things with His Grace. I told him I could not marry him.”

Lucy blinked. “You did?”

“Yes. I did.

“When?”

“Before we left Bath, actually. And to his credit, he’s made it exceedingly easy for me. Until yesterday, I hadn’t seen him since we returned to London.”

Lucy’s mouth fell open. “Truly?”

“Yes, truly. And you’d know that already if you hadn’t been hiding from me.”

Lucy bit her lip. “I’m so sorry.”

Cass continued in the happiest voice Lucy had heard out of her friend in weeks. “The duke and I went to the theater with Mother last night. We had a lovely time, but you know what I think?” Her small smile was back.

Lucy gulped. “What?”

“I think he only asked Mother and me to the theater so that he could inquire after you.”

Lucy couldn’t help the little smile that popped to her own lips. “I don’t believe that. He hasn’t been in contact with me since we left Bath.”

“What happened between the two of you there?” Cass asked carefully.

Lucy bit her lip. What a complicated question.

“Did you do anything? Say anything? To make him think you didn’t want to see him again,” Cass prodded.

Lucy nodded. “Yes. I’m afraid I did. But none of that matters. Tell me, why? Why did you break things off with Derek if Julian still plans to marry Penelope?”

Cass patted Lucy’s hand. “Oh, Lucy, everyone deserves to find love the way I love Julian. And just because I can’t have him, doesn’t mean the duke doesn’t deserve to find love with someone of his choosing. Derek doesn’t love me and I don’t love him. We both know that. He deserves to find someone with whom he can truly be happy.”

Lucy’s heart nearly beat out of her chest. “But what about you?”

Cass smoothed her hands over her skirts, but the hint of a smile still played around her lips. “I expect it will take a bit for me to become accustomed to Pen and Julian’s marriage. But eventually, I may find someone who loves me, who cannot live without me. Either that or I’ll run off to the convent.” She giggled. “I just need a bit of time.”

Cass nodded resolutely but Lucy didn’t believe it. This time she patted her friend’s hand. “You’re brave. Brave to make the decision and brave to face Penelope and Julian’s wedding. But I still think that we can—”

“No,” Cass said in the firmest voice Lucy had ever heard from her. “No more of your mischiefs. I refuse to attempt to break up my cousin’s engagement. I’m just happy Julian is recovering and that I shall see him again. Nothing else matters.” Tears shone in her blue eyes again.

Lucy blew out a deep breath. “Very well. I’ll let it be. For now.” She didn’t wait for Cass to protest that last bit. “It’s wonderful that Julian is coming home, but what about the letter you wrote to him? Did he mention it? Do you think that will make a difference in his feelings?”

Cass took a deep breath and looked her straight in the eye. “I never sent that letter.”

Lucy felt as if she were eight years old and had just fallen out of the apple tree. The breath had been completely knocked from her body. She’d been momentarily paralyzed. “You didn’t?”

“No. I didn’t.”

Lucy shook her head. “I don’t understand. I saw you write it. Watched you sand it. Waited while you heated the wax to seal it.”

“I know. I did all of that. But I never posted it, Lucy. I just”—Cass glanced down at her hands—“couldn’t. And now I realize it was the right thing to do.”

“The right thing to do,” Lucy echoed.

“Yes. Haven’t you been the one encouraging me to stand up for myself, not do everything I’m told? I’m relieved that I didn’t send that letter.”

Lucy grabbed her friend’s hand again and rested her forehead against it. “I’m sorry I tried to convince you to. I thought it was the right thing, at the time. Can you forgive me for that, too?”

Cass squeezed Lucy’s fingers. “Of course you thought it was the right thing. And I love you for it, Lucy, truly I do. There’s nothing to forgive.”

Pulling her hand from Lucy’s grasp, Cass clapped. “Now. Enough moping about things we cannot change. Let’s discuss something infinitely more delightful.”

Lucy stared at her with wide eyes. “Better than Julian coming home?”

“Well, perhaps not for me,” Cass replied with a small smile.