"But Damien we have never been more than friends. There has to be more than just friendship," she tried to reason with him. She didn't feel any attraction towards her best friend but she didn't want to say that to him. There was no reason to be hurtful.
"I'm simply asking you to think about it. I can take care of you and the baby and I think we could be happy," he said, while staring into her eyes. Trinity did love Damien and he was being reasonable but she'd never been physically attracted to him. She wished she loved him romantically because he was about the most perfect guy she'd ever known. But he simply didn't make her stomach quiver the way Drew had. She shook her head, to push that thought out of her mind. Drew wasn't a factor in any of her decisions.
The baby kicked her as she had that last thought and she smiled. Her little girl was a huge reminder Drew was a factor. She couldn't think about that right then. He'd lied to her and been no better than her cheating ex. She couldn't possibly trust him to be a part of her life.
"Let me think about things, Damien," she said.
"Take your time Trinity, I know it's a huge decision but I really do mean it. I'll take care of you and love every second doing it," he said. Damien had pretty much given up on romantic love himself but he'd go to the ends of the earth for his best friend. He wished he felt more than friendship toward her but far more marriages had lasted with less going for them than what he and Trinity shared. He'd hated watching her suffer over the last several months. He couldn't leave her all alone and pregnant.
"What happens if you meet the one and you're stuck with me?" she asked.
"What if you're the one but we never realized it?" he asked his own question. She laughed and promised to let him know soon. They went to their movie and the rest of the evening was relaxed as it always was. She had a feeling both of them would really regret it if she said yes but it was very tempting.
He pulled up in front of her apartment and walked her to her door, like he always did. They had never had one of those awkward moments but were having one right then. He took a deep breath and bent down to lay his lips on hers.
Trinity's first instinct was to pull away and ask him what he was possibly thinking but the man had proposed marriage to her, so it stood to reason he'd want to share a kiss. She made herself relax as he deepened the kiss. His arms wrapped around her awkwardly and she laid her own hands on his arms as he drew out the kiss.
She was incredibly sad to realize she felt absolutely nothing. There was no spark, no quivering in her stomach. She wasn't repulsed or anything but it was like kissing a cousin. He finally pulled away from her and she saw the regret in his own eyes. It was obvious he'd felt nothing either.
"Well, I'll leave you for now. Let me know what you decide. Our marriage doesn't have to be about passion and unrequited love, it can be about friendship and loving your baby girl," he said to her. She wasn't sure if he was trying to convince himself, or her. It didn't really matter, she thought because it wasn't about either of them, it was about her baby.
She reached up on her toes and kissed him softly on the cheek, then went through her door. She leaned against it, as a single tear fell down her face. She really wished she'd felt at least a smidgen of passion from her best friend.
Trinity was closing up her shop once again but feeling much better. Some of her swelling had finally gone down, helping her to feel a bit more human. It had been a week since Damien had proposed to her and she'd finally decided to accept. She'd tried and failed with romance and it would be really nice to have someone there to help her raise her child.
The two of them had spoken several times on the phone since their awkward kiss and were fine. They didn't discuss it but focused on their friendship, like they always had. She was lucky to have such a wonderful man in her life.
It was far more important to have security and love, than to have passion. She'd loved Damien for a long time and was sure it could grow if she wished for it. She'd just demand of her body to respond to him. She held her head up high with that thought. She was a stubborn person and she'd will herself to obey.
Damien started walking towards the shop, as soon as she was finished locking the door. She took a deep breath and got ready to tell him her decision. He seemed to know she was ready to talk to him because he said nothing as he approached. He just waited for her to gather her breath. She finally looked up into his beautiful eyes. He really was attractive; she didn't understand why she didn't desire him.
"I'll marry you, if the offer's still on the table," she told him with a tentative smile.
"That's wonderful," Damien told her, as he wrapped his arms around her expanding body and kissed her forehead. She felt like she was at home when she was in his arms and she thought she'd made the right decision. She refused to acknowledge the doubts trying to enter her mind. She also refused to acknowledge his hug did nothing more than comfort her needy body.