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The Struggle(67)

By:Jennifer L. Armentrout


I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t wary. Seth had whispered his love to me before and told me everything would be okay, but then he had left. He’d shut me out more than once. None of that had changed the way I felt for him, and maybe that made me a little crazy, but the world I now lived in was insane.

But I felt so . . . so raw, inside and out.

“I know what you’re thinking,” he said, his gaze searching mine. “And not because I can read your thoughts.”

“Thank God for that,” I muttered.

A brief grin appeared and then disappeared. “I’ve let you down.” When I opened my mouth, he raised his hand. “I have, Josie. More than once I’ve . . . I’ve pushed you away. I’ve made the wrong choices. I know I haven’t come even close to being the kind of man you deserve, but I’m going to change that.”

Oh.

Oh.

“You’ll never have to doubt me again,” he said, voice low and determined. “I’d die before that happened again.”

There was a swelling sensation in my chest like I was an untethered balloon that could lift off the ground and float away. Tears blurred my vision as I drew in a shaky breath. “I wouldn’t be standing here if I didn’t love you, Seth. I wouldn’t have let you sleep in the same bed with me last night if I didn’t,” I said, my breath catching. “There’s a lot I don’t really understand right now, like, for example, the whole ‘you’re a god’ thing. I mean, I get it. You’re a god.” Slipping my hands free, I wiggled my fingers. “Yay! You seem the same—well, you’re more mellow, but I like that, and I love you whether you’re a god or a normal human being. And yeah, there’s a lot we need to still figure out. Like that whole feeding thing, because I am so not okay with you getting all super close with a woman who looks like she could double for Angelina Jolie, and—”

Seth moved so fast I didn’t even register what he was up to until I felt his lips on mine. I sucked in a startled gasp. It felt like an eternity had passed since the last time he’d kissed me.

Just the tips of his fingers cradled my cheeks as his mouth gently moved over mine. He appeared fully aware of the split in my bottom lip, and was careful to not injure it further. His kiss was tender and so sweet, bringing a wave of fresh tears to my eyes. My hands went to his chest, and I could feel his heart pounding under my palm. My lips parted, and the kiss deepened, sending my pulse racing as the tip of his tongue touched mine.

I was immediately lost to him—to the feel of his lips, to the touch of his hands, and to his taste. I was lost and a part of me never wanted to be found.

He made a raw, hungry sound as his fingers glided down my throat and over my shoulders. “Say it again,” he ordered huskily.

Dazed with desire, I opened my eyes. I knew what he meant without any further explanation. “I love you, Seth.”

Seth kissed me again, and this time if he hadn’t circled his arm around my waist, I probably would’ve fallen right over, because this kiss left me breathless and yearning. If he had tried to tug me down on the sandy grass and strip off my clothes, I probably wouldn’t have stopped him. I would have been tearing at his clothes just as frantically.

But it was Seth who stopped, lifting his mouth from mine once more. “Sorry,” he said, voice thick and sexy. “I just . . . I just had to kiss you.”

Leaning in, I rested my head against his chest and sighed. “I’m not complaining.”

Seth’s deep chuckle sent a warm shiver across my skin. “I hope not.”

I met his gaze. “We’re in this together, right? For real? No more making decisions that you think are for the best without coming to me. You won’t leave me again, because if you do, I don’t think I could forgive you for that. Not anymore.”

“I’m not leaving you. We’re in this together, Josie.” His gaze searched mine. “If there is anything in this world, there is us.”

Closing my eyes, I let out a soft sigh. So much was going on in my head. I hadn’t forgotten about Mitchell or what had happened to Lauren. I missed my mom and Erin, and when it was quiet, I thought about those long, terror-filled hours in that dark, dank room. My head was a mess.

But having this—having the issues somewhat resolved between Seth and me cleared up some of the space in my head. A little of the tension eased from my muscles, and even though there were still so many problems, I had Seth.

And Seth had me.

He pulled me against him so our bodies were flush, and I could feel his arousal against my belly. “I missed you.” He curled one hand through my hair and he rested his chin atop my head. “I missed you when I was with you.”