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The State of the Art(37)

By:Iain M. Banks


comment,' said a small drone, floating down from

the foliage.It was one of a few drones the ship had

built to follow a couple of birds that had been in

the palm when it was hoisted up to the ship; the

birds had to be fed, and tidied up after (the ship

was proud that so far every dropping had been

neatly intercepted in mid-air). 'But I do admit I find

his behaviour slightly worrying.Perhaps he wants

to tell us what he feels about Earth, or me, or

worse still, perhaps he doesn't know himself.'

'Simpler than that,' Li said, putting his dick away. 'I

needed a piss.' He bent down and ruffled my hair

before plonking himself down at my side.('Urinal

in your room packed up, has it?' muttered the

drone. 'Can't say I blame it')

'I hear you're off back to the wilderness again

tomorrow,' Li said, crossing his arms and looking

seriously at me. 'I'm free this evening; in fact I'm

free now.I could offer you a small token of my

esteem if you like; your last night with the good

guys before you go off to infiltrate the barbarians.'

'Small?' I said.

Li smiled, made an expansive gesture, with both

hands. 'Well, modesty forbids'

'No, I do.'

'You're making a dreadful mistake you know,' he

said, jumping up and rubbing his belly absently

while looking in the direction of the nearest dining

area. 'I'm in really fine form at the moment, and I

really ain't doing anything tonight.'

'Too right you aren't.'

He shrugged and blew me a kiss, then skipped

off.Li was one of those who just wouldn't have

passed for Earthhuman without a vast amount of

physical alteration (hairy, and the wrong shape;

imagine Quasimodo crossed with an ape), but

frankly I think you could have put him down

looking as normal as an IBM salesman and he'd

still have been in jail or a fight within the hour; he

couldn't have accepted the limitations on one's

behaviour a place like Earth tends to insist on.

Denied his chance to go amongst the people of

Earth, Li gave informal briefings for the people

who were going down to the surface; those who

would listen anyway.Li's briefings were short and

to the point; he walked up, said, The fundamental

thing to remember is this; most of what you

encounter will be shit.' [*1*] And walked away again.

'Ms Sma' The small drone floated over and settled

into the hollow left by Li's behind. 'I was

wondering if you would do me a small favour

when you go back down tomorrow.'

'What sort of favour?' I said, putting Regan and

Goneril down.

'Well, I'd be terribly grateful if you'd call in at

Paris before you go to Berlin if you wouldn't

mind.'

'I don't mind,' I said.I hadn't been to Paris yet.

'Oh good.'

'What's the problem?'

'No problem.I'd just like you to drop in on Dervley

Linter.I think you know him?Well, just pop by for a

chat, that's all.'

'Uh-huh,' I said.

I wondered what the ship was up to.I did have an

idea (wrong, as it turned out).The Arbitrary, like every ship I've ever met in Contact, loved intrigues

and plots.The devices are forever using their spare

time to cook up pranks and schemes; little secret

plans, opportunities to use delicate artifices to get

people to do things, say things, behave in a certain

way, just for the fun of it.

The Arbitrary was a notorious match-maker,

perfectly convinced that it knew exactly who

would be best for each other, always trying to fix

the crew placements to set up as many potential

couples or other suitable combinations as it

could.It occurred to me that it was up to something

like this now, worried that I hadn't been sexually

active recently, and perhaps also concerned that

my last few partners had been female (the Arb

always did have a distinctly heterosexual bent for

some reason).

'Yes, just a little talk; find out how things are

going, you know.'

The drone started to rise from the seat.I reached

out and grabbed it, set it down on Lear on my lap, fixed its sensing band with what I hoped was a

steely glare of my own and said, 'What are you up

to?'

'Nothing!' the machine protested. 'I'd just like you

to look in on Dervley and see what the two of you

think about Earth, together; get a synthesis, you

know.You two haven't met since we arrived and I

want to see what ideas you can come up with

exactly how we should go about contacting them if

that's what we decide to do, or what else we can

do if we decide not to.That's all.No skullduggery,

dear Sma.'

'Hmm,'I nodded. 'All right.'

I let the drone go.It floated up.

'Honest,' the ship said, and the drone's aura field

flashed rosy with bonhomie; 'no skullduggery.' It

made a bobbing motion, indicating the book on my

lap. 'You read your Lear, I'll jet off.'

A bird flashed by, closely followed by another

drone; the one I'd been talking to tore off in