I watched as they prepped his arm, the spot right below his elbow on the backside. I watched as they placed the stencil and he stood up to look in the mirror, approving its placement. He showed it to me and asked, "How's it look?" He was so excited. All I could do was smile. I watched as he flinched when the needle dug into his skin, moving so quickly in and out you couldn't see it move, just heard the incessant buzzing. He put on a brave face, but I could tell at some points it really hurt him. It took about an hour and a half, but when all was said and done "Bit" was scrawled down his arm in a masculine yet flowery script.
"I love it," he said, moving in front of the mirror to examine it from all angles. I stood behind him and when he lowered his arm naturally, I could see my name, clear as day, etched permanently on his skin.
"You're crazy," I said under my breath. He heard me, of course, and we smiled at each other.
"You don't think you'd ever get my name tattooed on you?"
I shook my head. "No, probably not."
"Why?"
"I don't think I need a reason for not getting a tattoo. I still think you need a reason for the tattoo you just got."
"Why is it so hard for you to understand? This tattoo? It will last for as long as I live. When I die, this tattoo will still be on my skin, still be a part of me. But eventually, I will be gone, the tattoo will be gone, and you will be gone too. But, us? We will never be gone. We're forever. Infinite. So whether I get your name tattooed on me or not, it makes no difference. This ink, it's permanent, but it's nothing compared to how I feel about you."
I pulled him to me so that our lips were almost touching. "I think you're crazy for doing this, but I love you."
"That's all I need, Bit. I love you too."
The next two days went by too quickly. I met Asher's grandparents when we went to the farm and, although they were nice, they weren't much company. While Asher was out working the fields, or whatever he did the entire day he was gone, I spent a lot of time trying to draw the landscape around me. Thank goodness Reeve had thought to pack my drawing supplies. I wasn't a city girl, but I wasn't used to being in such a rural setting either. I tried perfecting my trees, worked on getting the shading of the wheat fields just right.
The last night of my visit Asher found me in the hay loft of the barn, where I had befriended the barn cat. This beastly cat must have made many meals of mice because he was massive. I couldn't even fathom how he'd made it up to the second story of the barn. He rubbed vigorously against my ankle, his pink, wet nose seeking out any part of me that he could accost.
"Bit, you up there?"
"Yeah. I'm hanging out with the cat."
I saw Asher's face appear as he climbed up the ladder to sit next to me. "Ah ha, you've met Sir Mouse-A-Lot." I giggled loudly.
"That's not really his name."
"Indeed. He is the best mouser in these parts. That's why he's so fat."
"How was your day?" I asked, looking over at him. His cheeks were pink as if he'd been in the sun too long. I looked over the rest of him and it seemed like his cheeks took the brunt of the sunlight.
"Long. I just kept thinking about how you're leaving tomorrow."
I scooted closer to him and rested my head on his shoulder. "Thank you for flying me out here. I had a really good time. Best birthday ever."
"I wish you could stay."
I sighed. "Honestly, I'd love to spend the summer with you, Asher. But there's nothing for me to do here."
"You could draw."
I looked over at him and took a moment to think about what he was saying. Asher had his moments of insecurity, just like any guy, and sometimes he just wanted me near him, especially when it felt like it wasn't an option. "I could draw, but eventually I would get tired of drawing. My dad would miss me and I feel like Reeve still needs someone around to keep her spirits up." I reached over and wrapped my hand around the back of his neck, urging him to look at me. "We've spent every summer apart, and even though I miss you like crazy, the best part of the summer is always the day you come back." I started playing with the hair on the back of his neck, liking the way it was still damp from sweat.
"I guess you're right," he said, wiping his hands over his face. He stopped and looked over at me, his gray eyes dim and a little bit sad. "But I'm still going to miss you."
"I'm going to miss you too, Asher. But I'm here right now." In that moment I think we both realized that we had only hours left together and that there were ways to show each other how much the other would be missed. I pulled his mouth to mine and climbed over his lap to straddle him. His hands came to rest on my backside and I trailed my hands up and down his chest, pouring everything into our kiss. I used my teeth to gently tug his bottom lip and won a low and rumbling groan from him, making my heart beat faster.
"I want you, Bit. Right here."
"I'm all yours, Babe." He wrapped one arm around my waist and rolled so I was under him. His mouth nibbled on my neck as his hands moved to unbutton my jean shorts. I pulled up on the back of his shirt, yanking it over his head. His mouth returned to my neck, but made its way down my body swiftly. He pulled down my shorts and panties and I lifted my hips to allow him to remove them completely. I quickly sat up and took my shirt and bra off, watching as he removed his pants.
Once we were both naked he dove back to me, laying me down on the hay. Any other time of my life I would have complained about the scratchy hay underneath my bare skin, but in this moment I simply did not care. All that mattered was the connection we were trying to make with one another.
He covered my body with his own, blanketing me with his skin still warm from all the hard work he'd done that day. His made trails of kisses along my skin, moving from my mouth, to my neck, to my shoulder and back again. His hand moved to cup my sex, his fingers parting me and slipping inside. My back arched off the floor and I whimpered into his mouth as his fingers worked me.
"I love the way you respond to me, Bit." He lowered his mouth to my breast and the combination of his mouth teasing my nipple and his fingers stroking me from the inside did nothing to calm the storm raging inside me. He was adding fuel to the fire. I heard his voice, but he sounded far away; I was lost in a new reality where all that mattered were our bodies and how we made each other feel. "I know every button to push and how to push it. I've mastered your body and there's not another person on the planet who could play you like I can."
I reached between us and felt him, hot and throbbing, between us. I ran my hand up and down along his shaft and watched as he lost his concentration. His mouth fell from my breast and his fingers eased their ministrations. He wasn't the only one who could bring pleasure. I loved watching him give in to the sensations, dropping all pretense and just feeling. His face fell to rest in the crook of my neck and I kissed along his shoulder while I worked him between my legs.
"I love you, Asher. And I love how turned on you get when I touch you." He groaned as I used my thumb to swirl the tip of his head, spreading around the drop of pre-cum that had accumulated.
"Please," he rasped. "I want to be inside you." I tilted my hips up and guided his tip into me. Then I felt his instincts kick in and he took control. At first he took long and slow drags through me, tilting his hips, fully burying himself into me with every stroke. I matched his rhythm and opened up for him, giving him access to the deepest parts of me. His thrusts matched his kisses and our bodies fell into a kind of synchronicity that made every fiber of my soul fall even deeper into love with him. This was so much more than just a physical connection. Every touch he gifted me with was one of love.
Eventually, he manipulated my body so that my legs were both folded to the side, and the new angle of penetration left me gasping for air, and grasping his arms, praying for the release that was hiding just out of reach. "Oh god, Asher," I moaned. This position brought his body closer to mine, and the way I was twisted at my stomach intensified every thrust and I feared I might explode. I'd never been this high before, never felt this kind of pressure. "Please." I didn't know what I was asking for. Relief? More? An End? I was at the mercy of my body and him.