The Single Undead Moms(29)

Wait. Harley. Oh, crap.

“Whatever crazy-ass evil thing you’re planning to do to my bike, just back away and do somethin’ else. Crack my kneecap or do the spleen-rippin’ thing, but just leave my bike alone.”

“I wasn’t going to hurt your precious bike,” I shot back as Wade dropped the backpack into a saddlebag slung over his bike’s seat.

“You were thinkin’ about it,” he said, pointing his finger at me.

“I—I was not,” I insisted. “I couldn’t afford to replace it, so I was fighting down the urge.”

He quirked an eyebrow and actually smiled at me. A real, sincere, mockery-free smile that actually made me want to smile back. I bit back the urge, but it was there. “So why are you standin’ here, eyein’ my bike in a suspicious fashion?”

“Because you parked it so freaking close to my van that I couldn’t even get into it.”

“Well, I only parked so close because I got distracted by the ‘big books’ sticker!” he exclaimed.

“What?” I cried.

“It was funny!”

I laughed, pinching the bridge of my nose and trying really hard not to like the cranky redneck. When I looked up, he was still grinning at me. I let loose a shocked gasp. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” I accused. “You enjoy winding me up, like some sort of backward, backwoods form of flirting. You’ve got one of those weird fetishes where you can only get turned on by the sound of a woman yelling at you while pelting you with balloons filled with banana pudding.”

Wade went pale, and his full mouth fell open. “I’m tryin’ to come up with a smartass comeback, but my brain seems to have gone ‘TILT.’ ”

I snickered. “That’s not the first time I’ve had that effect on a man.”

“I don’t doubt it,” he drawled.

A smoother, more cultured voice sounded behind me. “Is this man bothering you, miss?”

I turned to find a tall, dark-haired man standing behind us, giving Wade a strong case of side-eye. He was certainly the kind of guy you’d want coming to your rescue—handsome and well dressed in dark jeans and a navy dress shirt rolled at the elbows. His eyes were dark, and his features were even and sort of dignified in that old-fashioned matinee-idol way. Given that I was pretty sure he was a vampire, it was entirely possible he was an old-fashioned matinee idol. He looked vaguely familiar, but I couldn’t quite place him.

He looked vaguely familiar and yet so out of place in the Hollow. But somehow I was glad that he’d stopped to check on me. It gave me hope for the male gender. How wrong would it be for me to play injured party so this gentlemanly vampire would slap Wade around a little bit?

Pretty wrong.

Wade’s face, roguishly handsome though it might have been, could not stand up to a vampire whooping. So instead, I asked, “Do I know you?”

Wade had stepped between me and the newcomer and interjected, “Hell, no, I’m not botherin’ her.”

Mr. Gentleman gave Wade a withering stare. “I think I’ll let the lady answer that.”

“It’s fine,” I assured him. “Just a minor parking disagreement between fellow PTA members.”

Wade’s brows rose, as did the vampire’s. “Really?”

“Look, buddy, we’re not lookin’ for an audience, so keep walking,” Wade told him, making a shooing motion with his arm.

I ignored Wade’s rudeness, saying with saccharine sweetness, “My friend here was just asking me if I thought that his huge motorcycle could be considered a sign that he might be overcompensating for something. And I told him, ‘Don’t be silly, everybody knows that Corvettes are the classic compensation vehicles. Motorcycles are more of a midlife-crisis sort of purchase.’ ”

Wade cleared his throat. “And I told her that she was right, it was way more interestin’ to ride around town in a van that could carry a freakin’ basketball team. I mean, you have one kid, but really, drivin’ a barge is the smart thing to do.”

“Don’t pick on my van,” I retorted.

“Don’t call my bike an overcompensation. I don’t need to compensate for anything.”

“You sound a little defensive there.”

“I swear, woman, you are the most frustratin’ person I have ever met.”

“Are you sure you’re all right?” the vampire asked.

“We’re fine,” Wade and I chorused, glaring at each other. And it seemed that we were back to square one in terms of hostilities. It was nice to know we could agree on something, even if it was how much we irritated each other. The vampire stared for a few more beats and then walked away, frowning.