My spine tingled. Ordinarily, this meant a major military disaster. I wondered where it had happened. Antonius Hibrida had turned in a string of defeats in Macedonia, so that should not come as a surprise. Perhaps the Germans were on the march again. I shuddered at the thought. The last time they had terrorized all Italy, and it had taken Gaius Marius to defeat them. Despite all his posturing, Pompey was no Gaius Marius.
The Forum had that look it always gets when everyone knows there is bad news in the air. Instead of the usual drifting, shifting mass, people gathered in tight little knots, each one feeding the other’s ignorance with rumors and omens. I overheard talk of military disaster, civil war, invasion by foreign enemies, plague, famine, earthquake and wondrous visitations by the Olympian deities, all before we reached the steps of the Curia.
Senators were bustling up the steps, eager to find out what had transpired. The lictors of the magistrates stood leaning on their fasces, trading omens like everybody else. As we reached the steps, Caius Julius left our little procession to speak with a matron so hatchet-faced she made him and Celer look cheerful by comparison. I asked my companions who this might be, and someone identified her as Caesar’s mother. This was strange indeed. Roman women, however prestigious, were not supposed to take part in political matters.
Inside, the Curia vibrated with a low buzz, everyone apprehensive but also eagerly curious to know what had happened. Down in front, where all the greatest men were, stood the Consuls and the senior magistrates, the pontifexes and the Princeps. Something seemed decidedly odd about this group. Some of them, the Consuls in particular, looked amused. There was an aura of barely suppressed hilarity among them, until Caesar joined them and they resumed their stony faces. The Consuls took their curule chairs and the rest of us sat on our benches. When all was properly ordered, Hortalus stood to address the Senate.
“Conscript fathers,” he intoned, “I must address you on a grave matter.” His voice to the ear was like honey to the tongue. “Last night, here in this sacred city of Quirinus, a most heinous act of sacrilege was perpetrated!” He paused for effect, and he got it. This was the last news anyone was expecting to hear. Serious offenses against the gods were rare, and usually involved unchastity in a Vestal Virgin. I noticed, however, that Hortalus had used the rare word sacrilegium. Sexual relations with a Vestal was always referred to as incestum.
“Last night,” Hortalus went on, “during the ancient, holy and most solemn rites of Bona Dea, an impostor was discovered spying upon this ritual, which is forbidden to all men! It was the quaestor Publius Clodius Pulcher, who entered the house of the Pontifex Maximus by stealth, dressed as a woman!”
The Curia erupted into total uproar. There were calls for trial, calls for death. Mostly, there was just jabbering and whooping, and I did my share of it. I jumped around like a boy, clapping my hands with sheer joy.
“Now we’ll be rid of him!” I said to someone near me. “Now he’ll be condemned and given some awful ritual punishment, buried alive or pulled apart with red-hot pincers or something.” It was a cheering thought, but my neighbor dampened it.
“He’ll have to be tried first. Sit down and let’s see what the pontiffs and lawyers say.”
I hadn’t thought of that. Cicero had gotten himself in plenty of trouble by urging the Senate to condemn the Catilinarians without jury trial, and no one had forgotten that. I sat. The Senators would be cautious about prosecuting him, worse luck.
The Consul Calpurnianus stood and held up a hand for silence, which he finally accomplished.
“Conscript fathers, before we can even discuss action, we must have some definitions so that we know what we are talking about. The distinguished Princeps Quintus Hortensius Hortalus has used the word ‘sacrilege.’ I will ask another distinguished jurist, Marcus Tullius Cicero, to explain this term for us.”
Cicero stood. “In earlier times, ‘sacrilege’ was defined as the stealing of objects consecrated to a god, or deposited in a consecrated place. In more recent times, this word has been extended to cover all damage or insults done to the gods and to sacred places. If the conscript fathers so direct, I shall be most pleased to prepare a brief listing the sources and precedents for the legal charge of sacrilege.”
“Caius Julius Caesar,” said Calpurnianus, “as Pontifex Maximus, is it your judgment that this offense merits the name of sacrilege?”
Caesar stood and walked before the Senate as if he were officiating at his father’s funeral. He pulled a fold of his toga over his head, solemn as a tragic actor.