The Real Romero(74)

                ‘This is no longer a working proposition.’ He was somehow angry and bewildered as to how it was that these seemed to be the hardest words ever to have left his mouth. He had known that it was going to end sooner or later. So why did each syllable feel like broken glass? Maybe it was because he hadn’t been the one to determine the timing of the end. He had been pushed into it because unforeseen circumstances had forced his hand. That made sense. He, of all men, did not like having his hand forced.

                Milly opened her mouth but nothing emerged. She stared at him, wide-eyed, not daring to speak in case she started doing something really humiliating...like pleading and begging. Because, for the life of her, she couldn’t envisage life without him.

                Stupid Robbie and her broken engagement had been a walk in the park in comparison. This was the real thing. This was love, and hearing him tell her that their relationship was over was like staring down the barrel of a gun and waiting for the trigger to be pulled.

                Did she regret her honesty? No. Was she going to compound her horror and dismay by really pushing the boat out and bursting into tears? Absolutely not!

                ‘I get it,’ she told him quietly. ‘And I agree.’





                                      CHAPTER TEN

                A WEEK AND a half later, Milly could still scarcely believe that she had shown such fortitude in the face of the groundswell of misery that had been gathering at her feet.

                So she had hung on to her pride, but at what cost? He was on her mind twenty-four-seven. She thought of him when she was working, when she was relaxing, and she dreamed of him when she was asleep.

                He hadn’t argued with her when she had conceded defeat. He had wanted out and she hadn’t fought to bar him from the exit he was desperate to take. But he had been as quick to rush through the open door as she might have expected. He had continued the conversation: had told her in a cool, detached voice that he had never been in it for the long term; that he had warned her that commitment was off limits for him; that she should have known that after everything he had told her. His voice had been thick with accusation.

                She had agreed with him.

                ‘Off the cards and especially with someone like me,’ she had obliged him by pointing out. All the time, her heart had been beating so hard and so fast that her breathing was short and raspy.

                ‘With anyone. I’m not interested in a long-term relationship and I should never have allowed myself to be swept into something with a woman who was vulnerable and in search of a life partner.’

                ‘I may have been vulnerable but I was not in search of a life partner! And I may have fallen in love with you, but has it occurred to you that I’m not as ditzy as you think I am? Has it occurred to you that I know we’re not suited?’

                Of course it hadn’t occurred to him.

                ‘We’re different people from different backgrounds,’ she had persisted. ‘And that might not make a difference, but we’re also like oil and water. You’re darkness to my light. I’m not suspicious and distrusting of everyone; I like giving people chances. And I know you think I’m naive and stupid because I should have learned from Robbie and what happened but maybe, just maybe, that makes me a happier person than you, Lucas! You had one crappy experience and you’ve let it dictate the rest of your life! How does that make sense?’

                ‘So you’re prepared to carry on as we are with no expectations?’ he had mocked. ‘You’re fine if I tell you that I’m more than happy to take you to my bed but that’s all there is to it?’