"But they're going to know, and will gossip everywhere."
Alexander shrugged. "We'll all just have to get used to it, won't we?"
"You don't mind?"
"Not if you don't, dearest. About me being blind, or being your lover."
"I don't mind anything, my love, so long as you're happy," she said firmly, squeezing his arm tightly against her breasts for a brief second.
He nodded. "I am happy, darling. Just tell me what to expect in the shop, and I'll do my best."
"Two steps up. Tables on either side of a long aisle. I'll have to tell you the colors."
She watched in fascination as he ran an unobtrusive finger over the fabrics as he walked past, and was able to tell her what they were in an instant.
"Something like this one for the shirts," he said, picking up a gorgeous snowy linen.
"And these for the waistcoats and cravats," he said, selecting some very fine silks.
"They are wonderful. And just the right color for your gorgeous dark looks."
"And some fabric for a new gown for you?" he suggested, moving over to the next table. "I think this spotted muslin, and this jaconet."
She was startled at how well he was able to identify the fabrics. "The spotted is fine. It's white. The jaconet is primrose, and would make me look rather sallow."
"This one, then?"
"A lovely rose damask. Yes, just the thing."
The women who had invited her to enter watched in fascination and envy as they bought the fabrics they fancied and moved on to the trimmings.
He felt the lace, and could tell the quality of each of them without hesitation. She chose the buttons for his waistcoats, and pronounced herself finished.
"Stockings and so on?"
"No need. Some gloves for you, perhaps?"
He chose some fine black kid ones in a trice, and an elegant cotton pair for dancing.
Sarah confirmed that they were white, and had the shopkeeper wrap the purchases. She furtively took the money out of her reticule and palmed it to Alexander. He paid for the purchases without so much as fumbling, and took his change with equal skill.
Once they had chatted with the other women and the shopkeeper for a short time, they said goodbye, and stepped out into the street.
"That was a most remarkable performance, Alexander."
"I have the feeling I've done this before."
She nodded. "I would say so. The only thing you didn't get was the color. But you got the fabric and the quality immediately."
"So I suppose I was in trade?"
"Unless you had an entire harem of mistresses," she said a trifle waspishly.
He shook his head. "Do I strike you as a rake?"
"No, actually. Despite all we've shared in bed, no."
"Glad to hear it," he said dryly, "though some men might be less than flattered."
"I have no complaints, darling. I'm just trying to grasp who you really are. A wealthy merchant is my best guess."
"Then why go to war?"
She shrugged and put her arm around his waist. "I don't know. The same reasons Jonathan did? To be patriotic?"
"Or because I had a terrible marriage."
"It could be," she admitted quietly, trying to ignore the jealous surge which nearly choked her.
"I just wonder, if she's alive, what she's done to try to find me."
"If she even bothered," Sarah said with a sigh, then immediately regretted how dismissive her words sounded. "I mean, if you were unhappy, and she didn't hear from you for a while, she might assume you were dead, or that you had deserted her."
"Unless she told me to leave. Or knew why I left."
"We don't have to talk about this if it upsets you," she said stoutly, her tone betraying her own distress.
He shifted the parcels he was carrying, and got a firmer grip on her arm. "I only care because I want to marry you as soon as possible, Sarah. The only reason I would want to find the lady in question, if she's still alive, is to get a divorce. Please believe me."
"Yet you must have cared about her once. Loved her?" she added in a tiny voice.
Alexander squeezed her arm. "If I ever did, I have no such memory of that sensation. Or if I cared about her, it wasn't love. It might have been a business affair, an arranged marriage. They're common enough.
"Perhaps I didn't know better, until I realized there was a great deal I was missing in my marriage. I don't have any recollection of warmth, companionship, delight. None of what I've shared with you in the few short days since we met. Since we've become lovers."