Blake lifted his head to meet her gaze. "Is that what you thought? No. Never. Not once. I swear it. Not since before I met you, and even then that had been months before. And after, well, it was unthinkable."
She frowned in confusion. "But you didn't come home that night-"
"What night?" he asked quietly.
"Two nights, actually. The second one was the morning I hugged you. When we left London."
He glanced down at her in dismay. "That was the night I had a horrendous emergency case at the clinic. You mean to say all his time you thought I was-"
"I had no right to be jealous, but it did hurt, I have to admit," she said with a sigh. "Thinking you were with her, when you'd turned away from me and the love I could give you."
Blake stroked down both her breasts worshipfully. "No secrets between us, love. I never did. We merely speak for form's sake. It's over between us, has been for a long time. I should have had the sense to break it off long ago, even before we met.
"As you said before when describing love, she doesn't speak to my heart or my body. I should have had the courage to finish with her as you tried to do with Adam. I was weak and stupid. I'm sorry if you were hurt.
"The sad truth is, I forgot that she was ever anything to me other than someone to speak to. A passing acquaintance. She could be very witty when she chose. Made me feel interesting, important, by listening to me. But the rest meant nothing. All I can think about day and night is you.
"I also have to warn you that Rosalie proposed to me that we pick up where we left off so many years ago."
Arabella shot him a look of outrage.
He shook his head vehemently. "Have no fear, darling. The offer wasn't the least bit tempting, even couched as it was in the most licentious, not to mention profitable terms. She left me cold.
"That's why she performed that little drama in my examination room. But I swear, there's never been and never will be any woman I love or want as much as I love and want you."
"Then show me," she urged in a throaty purr. "Touch me. Love me."
"Gladly. But first things first. I need you to love me for a moment. Move your hand and I'll show you what almost happens to me every time you walk into a room."
She did as he suggested innocently enough.
He nearly climaxed then and there. Her stroke was perfect, just firm enough to be really arousing, and light enough to send shivers coursing through his entire body.
He clung onto her tightly and gave her a heated kiss as she propelled him to his release. He shuddered in desperation against her and groaned weakly, at last pouring himself into her palm.
When Blake could speak again, he kissed heatedly and said, "Thank you, my love. I know you know the basics from what you've learned in the clinic, but there has to be absolute candour between us."
"I know. I feel no shame, no fear."
"Good then, because you know you can tell me anything. I want us to share an absolute confidence."
"We shall. Now that I know you love me too, I have nothing to hide."
"But something to deal with." He reached over and grabbed one of the towels. "That is my essence. How babies are made. The prophylactics will prevent them from going into your womb. And they prevent disease as well. I tell you all this so you will know how to be safe and never need fear an unwanted pregnancy.
"When we're married, I'll never force you. It's a big step, and it's your body, that you give to me of your own free will. We need to share the responsibility equally.
"I'm afraid it's possible to lose control at times and not always think clearly. If you fear pregnancy, then you must tell me to stop, no matter what we are doing, and make me withdraw."
She shook her head. "That would be like holding back the tide, or my own delight in pleasing you. I don't think I can live my life, love you, with all of these rules and regulations you keep imposing upon us. You still sound like my guardian, not my lover. I want all of you, Blake, heart, soul, body, babies too."
Her words stung, but he admitted, "I know. Yet anyone who cared about you would tell you the same thing. I want to be your lover, your husband, but I don't want you to hate me."
"I could never-"
He sighed. "Perhaps not now, or in the first flush of love and youth, but later, when you were tied down with five or six children, or you fell out of love with me-"
"Stop it, stop it right now!" she almost shouted. "I know what you're doing. You're still trying to do the noble thing and give me up. Well, I won't let you, do you hear?"