The Rakehell Regency Romance Collection Volume 2(304)

Blake felt a huge weight lifting from his shoulders. "I'm not sure I follow. Have I done something wrong?"



She shrugged. "Nothing wrong, no. But I feared from the first that we were far too different in our opinions, upon drinking, gambling, hunting, and so on. These issues may seem unimportant, but I would like to respect the man I marry. I fear in this instance we are too diametrically opposed on every opinion to ever be happy.



"Even were this not the case, I could not marry you. My feelings simply do not tend that way, no matter how much so many people have tried to persuade us that uniting our two halves of the family would be a sensible, practical thing to do.



"You cannot help it. It's me. I know you will think this is all fustian nonsense, the idle dreams of a foolish young girl. But I feel none of the delight, the soaring of the senses I would hope to feel in the presence of the man I am to share my whole life with."



"I see. I'm sorry."



"No need to be sorry. It's just a fact, no more. I know I'm completely unfamiliar with the way of the world, but I know what I've read and heard. Love does exist, romantic love. Not merely warm friendship. Therefore I cannot marry you."



A devil seized him and he simply could not resist the temptation. "You've just admitted you have no experience. Do you not think perhaps if you were to try-"



"I have tried. Your few kisses have left me unmoved, sir. I don't love you. I can't think further pursuit of that side of our relationship is going to improve this situation in any way."



"So you wish to move on to another man who can make you happy in that respect?"



She stiffened. "You make it sound so cold and calculating. I assure you, this is hard for me to admit-"



"No, not at all. I would never dare to fault you for your true feelings. I'm just trying to understand your wishes. I am not reproaching you. If you cannot feel for a man such as myself, you should by all means try to find happiness with another," he whispered in her ear.



"If you're referring to your brother Oliver, you need have no fear. His heart resides elsewhere, solely upon himself so far as I can see. He is even less likely a soulmate than you have proven to be."



Blake was elated. Both of his main rivals were being rejected by Arabella without him having said one word against them. It was just too wonderful, and surely had to be a sign.



"What of Philip Marshall, who has been ever at your side? Or Matthew Dane? You cannot tell me he did not try for you in London. Or Randall Avenel."



She shook her head. "Philip and I are friends, no more. He has never offered for me. And I would never consider marrying a rake. The appellation is supposed to suit all three men, though Philip has never shown any romantic intentions toward me at all. Do not fear you have been supplanted. This is my own decision."



"I have no right to be jealous or angry with you. You are your own woman. With your own thoughts, feelings and desires, which a man who was in love with you would wish you to fulfil."



She half turned, but did not face him.



He stepped back from the fire further to keep out of sight.



She sighed after a time. "I must say, you're being awfully generous about all this. I mean, this must be a significant dashing of your hopes if all you said to me in the past about your feelings was true."



Blake thought quickly. "Ah, but anyone who truly loved and cared for you would want you to be happy, even if that meant letting you go, giving you to another. It would be a huge sacrifice, one I am not so sure I will be able to make easily. But if you say I must, then I shall. My fate is in your hands."



She rubbed her eyes with her thumb and forefinger before pinching the bridge of her nose.



Really, this was so confusing. Adam was suddenly being so kind, lover-like, reasonable. Kind, tender, she thought as his hands came up to rest upon her shoulders once more.



This time she did not pull away. And this time he had taken off his gloves. His flesh burnt into hers, causing her to shudder, and most shamefully, causing her nipples to jut out through the jaconet of her evening gown. The bodice was taut with the effort of trying to breathe. She hugged her arms to her to try to disguise her reaction.



Blake said softly in her ear, "I can understand your concern. Our acquaintance has been very sudden, and almost forced along at a rapid pace by the instigation and promotion of others who think it would be a very fine thing for us both. You are confused, naturally. I don't blame you for being so.



"But I would beg you to grant me one favour, and that is to try to win your love for my own, gently, slowly, patiently, of your own free will. With no one trying to promote what they perceive as a so-called good match."