DAY SEVENTEEN
THINKING ABOUT MY PURPOSE
Point to Ponder: I am called to belong, not just believe.
Verse to Remember: “In Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others.”
Romans 12:5 (NIV)
Question to Consider: Does my level of involvement in my local church demonstrate that I love and am committed to God’s family?
18
Experiencing Life Together
Each one of you is part of the body of Christ, and you were chosen to live together in peace.
Colossians 3:15 (CEV)
How wonderful it is, how pleasant, for God’s people to live together in harmony!
Psalm 133:1 (TEV)
Life is meant to be shared.
God intends for us to experience life together. The Bible calls this shared experience fellowship. Today, however, the word has lost most of its biblical meaning. “Fellowship” now usually refers to casual conversation, socializing, food, and fun. The question, “Where do you fellowship?” means “Where do you attend church?” “Stay after for fellowship” usually means “Wait for refreshments.”
Real fellowship is so much more than just showing up at services. It is experiencing life together. It includes unselfish loving, honest sharing, practical serving, sacrificial giving, sympathetic comforting, and all the other “one another” commands found in the New Testament.
When it comes to fellowship, size matters: Smaller is better. You can worship with a crowd, but you can’t fellowship with one.
Once a group becomes larger than about ten people, someone stops participating—usually the quietest person—and a few people will dominate the group.
Jesus ministered in the context of a small group of disciples. He could have chosen more, but he knew twelve is about the maximum size you can have in a small group if everyone is to participate.
The Body of Christ, like your own body, is really a collection of many small cells. The life of the Body of Christ, like your body, is contained in the cells. For this reason, every Christian needs to be involved in a small group within their church, whether it is a home fellowship group, a Sunday school class, or a Bible study. This is where real community takes place, not in the big gatherings. If you think of your church as a ship, the small groups are the lifeboats attached to it.
God has made an incredible promise about small groups of believers: “For where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst.”1 Unfortunately, even being in a small group does not guarantee you will experience real community. Many Sunday school classes and small groups are stuck in superficiality and have no clue as to what it’s like to experience genuine fellowship. What is the difference between real and fake fellowship?
In real fellowship people experience authenticity. Authentic fellowship is not superficial, surface-level chit-chat. It is genuine, heart-to-heart, sometimes gut-level, sharing. It happens when people get honest about who they are and what is happening in their lives. They share their hurts, reveal their feelings, confess their failures, disclose their doubts, admit their fears, acknowledge their weaknesses, and ask for help and prayer.
Authenticity is the exact opposite of what you find in some churches. Instead of an atmosphere of honesty and humility, there is pretending, role-playing, politicking, and superficial politeness but shallow conversation. People wear masks, keep their guard up, and act as if everything is rosy in their lives. These attitudes are the death of real fellowship.
Real fellowship happens when people get honest about who they are and what is happening in their lives.
It is only as we become open about our lives that we experience real fellowship. The Bible says, “If we live in the light, as God is in the light, we can share fellowship with each other…If we say we have no sin, we are fooling ourselves.”2 The world thinks intimacy occurs in the dark, but God says it happens in the light. Darkness is used to hide our hurts, faults, fears, failures, and flaws. But in the light, we bring them all out into the open and admit who we really are.
Of course, being authentic requires both courage and humility. It means facing our fear of exposure, rejection, and being hurt again. Why would anyone take such a risk? Because it is the only way to grow spiritually and be emotionally healthy. The Bible says, “Make this your common practice: Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you can live together whole and healed.”3 We only grow by taking risks, and the most difficult risk of all is to be honest with ourselves and with others.
In real fellowship people experience mutuality. Mutuality is the art of giving and receiving. It’s depending on each other. The Bible says, “The way God designed our bodies is a model for understanding our lives together as a church: every part dependent on every other part.”4 Mutuality is the heart of fellowship: building reciprocal relationships, sharing responsibilities, and helping each other. Paul said, “I want us to help each other with the faith we have. Your faith will help me, and my faith will help you.”5