‘Yes, I do, and I don’t want you working all the hours God sends in order to support our baby. This is my responsibility too. I’m just trying to make things easier for you, Leila.’
‘But you live in such a different world.’
‘It’s warmer,’ he agreed wryly.
‘You know what I mean,’ she insisted, but thankfully he had succeeded in lightening the atmosphere, and now she was trying not to smile.
* * *
‘As far as I’m concerned, we live in the same world, Leila. You want to work. I want to work. If a child enters my life I want that child to enjoy the benefits I can provide for it. Otherwise, what the hell am I working for?’
If he could brush aside his fears for Leila for only a second he could see that with a child in his life there would be real purpose to the drive that carried him forward so relentlessly. He worked to help others, but to be able to do that and have a child of his own to do things for...
‘I would never stop you seeing the baby, Raffa.’
He refocused on Leila’s face, wondering what had prompted that remark. ‘Custody is a long way from being decided yet.’
‘But a child should live with its mother—’
‘Don’t you trust me, Leila?’
‘Yes...’
No, he thought as she fell silent. Leila didn’t trust him with something as precious as her child. Why should she when she hardly knew him? Leila only wanted to be a good mother. She would never forget that her own mother had been killed so tragically when she was so young, or what a sense of loss she had felt since then.
‘We’ll decide this together. Perhaps we should continue this discussion when you’re feeling less emotional.’
‘In around a couple of years’ time?’ she suggested, her amused glance flashing up to meet his.
‘Whenever you’re ready,’ he said gently.
There was a long silence and then she said, ‘I think I’m always going to be influenced by the letter my mother wrote to me before she died. I think she was trying to prepare me for the big things in life, like this.’
‘A letter?’
‘I had to promise to be bold...take life by the scruff of the neck and forge my own path, rather than allowing the past to haunt me and hold me back.’ She smiled. ‘I was trying to get the balance right and went overboard on the night of the party.’
They both had, he remembered, thinking back. Before that night he guessed Leila had made do with dreams, because dreams were safe and available to everyone, even the quietest of sisters. ‘We will work this out, Leila, and while we do there’s something you could do for me.’
She looked at him and raised a brow. ‘What could I possibly do for you, Raffa?’
His grandmother’s illness had really thrown him. Leila’s news had really thrown him. Perhaps if he brought the two of them together... ‘There’s someone I’d like you to meet.’
‘Who?’ she said suspiciously.
‘My grandmother. You did say you’d like to meet her.’