I pretended as though I was a little put out by his request, but really, spending all my time with Devon, Ruby, and Jaxy was the best distraction. At least when I was around them I could pretend my mind wasn't always on the child I wished for so desperately.
Even with my previous history, the obstetrician wouldn't see me before I hit eight weeks. I tried to negotiate for an earlier appointment, but the scheduling nurse said it wouldn't make a difference. If we wanted proof of a viable pregnancy, we'd have to wait for the eight-week scan-that's when we'd be able to see the heartbeat.
Six weeks.
Six weeks of waiting for that appointment.
Six weeks that felt more like six years.
But Devon did exactly what I asked of him; he never mentioned the pregnancy or the baby.
At four weeks when my period never came, he was silent.
At five weeks when I went back to school and came home exhausted every day, napping and going to bed early, he said nothing.
At six weeks when I started vomiting every morning, he simply held my hair up and rubbed my back, saying not one word.
At seven weeks when I could no longer stand the smell of meat being grilled, I watched him smile, but he still said nothing.
At eight weeks when the doctor pointed to our baby on the screen, showing us the little fluttering of its heart, he finally leaned down and whispered in my ear, "You're having my baby."
Epilogue
Devon
Three Months Later
Spending Christmas in Hawaii was both good and bad. Good because, what's not good about Hawaii in December? But bad because for every Christmas until the end of time I'd be thinking about that one glorious holiday we spent in paradise.
Evie and Nate's wedding was wonderful, and I'll never forget how beautiful and grown-up Ruby looked standing next to Evie acting as her maid of honor. They opted to stay in Hawaii for their honeymoon, but since they were newlyweds, we hadn't seen much of them.
We planned on staying a week after the wedding and rented a condo right on the beach. It was my favorite time of day in Hawaii-sunset. And my favorite sunsets were the ones that included Grace. As I stood on the balcony of our rental, I could see Grace walking along the sand, Ruby and Jax walking alongside her, dress blowing in the wind, and baby bump on full display.
We'd decided to leave the sex of the baby a surprise, so I didn't know if she was carrying my son or my daughter; all I knew for sure was that it didn't matter in the slightest. She was healthy, the baby was healthy, my family was stitched together in the most beautiful way, and Grace was the thread that held us all together.
I think I knew from the moment I saw Grace and Jax under the shade of that tree that she'd be mine forever, but life and all its tangled webs made sure our path was just rocky enough to prove to Grace that I wasn't going anywhere, that there was nowhere else I'd rather be than with her, Ruby, Jax, and our new baby.
We'd waited until we hit twelve weeks to tell anyone about the pregnancy for two reasons: one, because we wanted to hit that safe zone, and two, because we wanted a little bit of time to acclimate. Those weeks – between eight and twelve – where I was the only one who knew Grace was carrying my baby-and was allowed to speak to her about it-were some of the best weeks of my life. I'd catch just a glimpse of her face and see the glow she had and know it was because she was pregnant with my baby. The first time she got out of the shower and I could see the tiniest of bumps, nothing was going to stop me from kneeling down right in front of her and running my hands, lips, and nose along the gentle slope.
None of her doctors could explain how it happened; most just called it a happy occurrence. And it was. But it was more than that. Our baby was a miracle. And if it could happen once, it could happen again. I never brought up another baby with Grace because I knew she wouldn't like it-she wanted to focus on reality, not fantasy-but I couldn't help but wonder if there were more babies in our future. I wanted to give her everything, and I knew she'd want another.
When we'd finally found the courage to tell Ruby and Jax they would have a little brother or sister, well, I'd never seen my kids so happy before.
Everything was absolutely perfect.
Except for one thing.
"Hey, you," Grace said as she slowly climbed the private stairs to our condo. "What are you doing out here all alone?"
"Enjoying the view," I said, pulling her close as she made it to the top of the stairs. My hand automatically found the part of her belly that stuck out the farthest and caressed her there. "How are you feeling?"
"Pregnant," she said with a smile. She never complained. Not once. And I understood that, knew that she viewed her pregnancy as a miracle and wasn't about to complain about something she'd wished for for so long. But I knew it took its toll on her. I'd have to be blind not to see the times she rubbed her back, or winced as she ran a hand over her belly.
"I have something for you," I said, gently taking her hand and leading her along the railing of the balcony.
"You do?"
"Yeah, down there." I dropped her hand and pointed to the black velvet box sitting atop the railing a few yards away. She stopped and I heard a quick intake of breath. Her face turned toward me, shock and surprise written all over it. "Go. Open it."
She walked slowly toward the box and when she reached it, her hand shook as she picked it up. I watched as she opened it slowly and waited, wanting desperately to see the reaction paint across her face. Grace never disappointed me, and I smiled as I watched her face go from surprise, to shock, and then straight to the ugly cry. She did that a lot too, now that she was carrying my baby, and I loved it. Almost as much as I loved her.
Her hand was covering her mouth, the tears were streaming down her cheeks, and she didn't notice when I went down to one knee just to the side of her.
"Babe?" I asked with a laugh. She turned to find me on my knee and started crying harder. "Ah, don't cry, Grace." I took her hand and pulled her to sit on my knee, the ring box still cradled in her shaking fingers. "I want us to be a family, Grace. All five of us. I met you and was captured by your compassion, and years later your heart's capacity still astounds me. If you let me, I'll spend the rest of my life trying to match it. I'll love you every day with everything I have, but it will still pale in comparison to the love you've shown me and my kids. Marry me, Grace? Let me love you forever."
"Are Ruby and Jax all right with this?" she asked, placing one trembling hand on my cheek, making me love her that much more.
"They helped me pick out the ring."
"You've given me everything I never thought I'd have."
"Then say yes, sweetheart." I brought her hand from my cheek to kiss her palm, watching her melt at my words.
"Yes," she whispered, then laughed as she threw her arms around my neck.
Ruby and Jax ran up the stairs giggling and laughing, hugging Grace as she slipped the ring on her finger. I had my whole world right in front of me, and everything was beautiful in the presence of Grace.
The End