The Playboy's Proposition(28)

Accepting the reality was painful. She wandered around his home, sensing  this was her last time in his domain. Her stomach clenching so hard she  could barely stand it, she wrote a note and left it on his pillow.

Her leaving would provide relief. More than anything, she just wanted his peace.





Michael came home on Tuesday night excited beyond belief. He couldn't  wait to share his news with Bella. Possibilities bloomed in his mind.  "Bella," he called. "Bella, I have news."Silence greeted him. Maybe she  was working late. Damn, he'd wanted to share this with her. He wandered  upstairs to change his clothes. He pulled off his suit and stepped into  jeans and a long-sleeve sweater to ward off the chill of the evening.  Bella would make him warm later on, he thought, smiling to himself.

His glance strayed to the bed and he caught sight of a piece of paper on  his pillow. Curious, he walked to the bed and picked up the folded  paper. Unfolding it, he read it.

Dear Michael, I am so very sorry, but I cannot continue our affair. I  have fallen in love with you. I know it's not what you want. It's messy  and emotional and I don't know how to deal with it. I thought I knew  what love was before I met you, but I was wrong. Now I just want you to  be happy. If I leave, you won't feel pressured to do anything more than  you want. I'll pay you back even if it takes my whole life. I promise. I  wish you every good thing. Love, Bella.

Michael sucked in a quick, sharp breath. Bella was gone. He felt as if a  knife had stabbed him between his ribs. She loved him and he couldn't  love her back. How could he explain that he'd spent his life protecting  himself so he wouldn't be hurt again? How could he explain that being  self-sufficient was the only thing that had made him survive?

Loving meant being vulnerable, and he couldn't do that. For anyone.

Michael avoided his bed as long as possible and finally faced it without  Bella's loving arms. How could he possibly sleep? he thought, tossing  and turning. Hours later, he finally fell into a restless sleep where he  dreamed of Bella. Her smile, her eyes, her touch. His alarm sounded and  his arms were empty. No Bella. No joy.                       
       
           



       

He rose and worked out anyway.





"Don't ask," Bella said to her aunt as Charlotte looked at her with  concern."How can I not?" Charlotte asked. "You have circles under your  eyes. Your smile is a grimace."

"I just have to soldier through," Bella said. "It's one day at a time  right now. Okay," she amended. "One hour at a time. It will get better.  It will just take time."

"What happened?" Charlotte asked.

"I don't want to talk about it," Bella said.

Charlotte sighed. "Well, I realize this is horrible timing, but Fred and I have decided to get married."

Bella blinked in amazement. "You're going through with it?"

"Yeah," Charlotte said. "He says he can deal with anything that happens, even a recurrence of my cancer."

Bella smiled despite her own pain. "What a man."

"Yeah," Charlotte agreed. "What a man. We're going to do it in two weeks."

"So soon?" Bella said.

"When you get to be our age you don't want to waste time. We're going to  go to the justice of the peace then have a party at my house. Would you  be a witness?"

"Of course," Bella said, and hugged her aunt. "I'm so happy for you. You deserve this."

"Thank you, sweetie. Your time will come. I know it will," Charlotte said, but Bella had given up on Michael.

Bella had finally realized that to be willing to surrender to love was to be strong. She deserved to be loved.





Michael's cell phone vibrated as he reviewed the balance sheet for one  of his restaurants. He glanced at the caller ID and picked up. "Hey,  Rafe, what's up?""I'm in town," his brother said. "Feed me an early  dinner."

Michael glanced at his watch. "It's three o'clock now. Are you going back tonight?"

"Yeah," Rafe said. "Now that I have Nicole and Joel, I don't like being away overnight if I can help it."

"Big switch for you," Michael said.

"Yes and a good one," he said. "So where do you want me to meet you?"

Michael was tempted to get a rain check. He hadn't been in a social mood  since Bella had left. But Rafe was his brother, and after all they'd  been through, he couldn't brush him aside.

"What are you in the mood for? Steak, Asian, seafood?"

"I'd like a good greasy burger and fries," he said.

"You got it. Meet me at Benson's downtown. See you in a few," he said, and hung up.

A half hour later, he and his brother sat in the bar of one of Michael's  popular downtown restaurants. The server took their order as soon as  they sat down.

Rafe grinned in approval. "One of the things I like about eating with you is how great the service is. There's never a wait."

"I doubt you do much waiting wherever you go," Michael said.

Rafe shrugged and studied Michael. "Hey, are you okay? You look a little rough around the edges."

"Thanks, bro," Michael said wryly. "I've been working a lot lately."

"Yeah, well take a break every now and then. Even us Medicis have to do that."

"When I get a chance," Michael said and changed the subject. "How is Nicole?"

"Morning sickness appears to have hit except for her the nausea is worse  in the evening. She can't stand the smell or sight of any kind of  meat."

Michael nodded. "That's why you wanted a greasy burger."

"Yeah, this may be my only chance for a while. But I'm not complaining.  She's worth it," Rafe said. "And this time, I'll be with her and the  baby from the beginning."

Michael knew that Rafe still suffered from not knowing he'd had a child  for the first three years of Joel's life. "It looks like you and Joel  are getting along pretty well."

"Oh, yeah. He's a great kid. Nicole has done an amazing job with him.  She sends her best, by the way, and still wants the recipe for that cake  Bella made. You don't mind passing that on for me, do you?" Rafe asked  as the waiter served their meal.

Michael had suspected the subject of Bella might come up, but he'd hoped  it would happen nearer the end of the meal. His appetite suddenly  disappeared. "That might be tough. Bella and I aren't seeing each other  anymore."

Rafe blinked in surprise. "Really? I thought she must be important if  you were introducing her to us. But I guess it's easy come, easy go."

"I wouldn't go that far," Michael muttered and took a drink of water.                       
       
           



       

Rafe frowned as he bit into his burger. "I don't understand. Are you saying she dumped you?"

"I didn't say that," Michael said. "She just wanted something I couldn't give her."

"Hmm," Rafe said and continued to eat his meal. "This is a great burger,  by the way. I haven't had one in a week. So what did Bella want? A  house in the South of France?"

Michael shook his head. "No. It wasn't anything like that. Nothing  material. She just wanted me to have feelings for her that I'm not  capable of."

"Oh," Rafe said. "You mean love."

Michael felt as if his brother had pointed a gun at his heart. "Yeah. I told her at the beginning, but things changed."

"You don't look too happy about it," Rafe said.

"I'm not, but there's nothing I can do about it."

"Do you love her?"

"I don't believe in love for myself. For other people, it's fine. It's not for me."

"Chicken," Rafe said in a matter-of-fact voice and lifted his hand  before Michael could reply. "Hey, I was there, too. You think Damien  wasn't? With our background, we keep our hearts under lock and key. Too  much damage already done. Don't want to lose anymore. Trouble is, if you  don't let the right one into the vault, you lose even more."

Michael couldn't listen to his brother's advice right now. He was still  miserable about losing Bella. "Okay, thanks for the lecture. Can we  change the subject?"

"Sure," Rafe said. "But it won't change that wretched feeling of loss in your gut."

"Thanks again," Michael said. "How's the yacht business?"

He listened to the news of Rafe's latest business ventures and shared some of his.

"Have you gotten any more news from your P.I. about Leo?"

"Just what I told you last week. What a roller-coaster ride. Last week,  the PI tells me maybe he's alive but it will take longer to find him."  He shook his head. "I don't know what to make of it."

"Me, either," Rafe said.