But I can’t. Maybe because I’m an idiot or a sucker for punishment but I ask James for another beer and get off the stool.
“What’s going on?” he asks me as he slides the pint into my hands. “Are you and Stephanie in a fight?”
I eye him sharply. “What makes you say that?”
“Well, when I mentioned your name to her earlier, she looked like she was going to stab someone with a fork and when I mentioned her name just now, you looked like you were about to be stabbed with a fork. Did something…happen?”
“No,” I say quickly. “What did you say to her earlier? About me?”
“I said to her, ‘Talk to Linden lately?’ and she visibly shivered like someone walked over her grave.”
“I’m not having the best luck with the ladies,” I say jokingly.
James doesn’t smile. “Steph isn’t just one of your ladies, Linden. She’s your friend.”
God, when did he get to be such a killjoy? I didn’t need everyone in the world mad at me.
I ignore him and make my way around the bar and toward the corner booth. Nicola sees me first and her eyes nearly bulge out of her. Kayla just looks venomous.
And then Steph turns her head and it’s true what James said, she does look like she’s going to grab a fork off the table and hurl it at me, right between the eyes. I know I deserve all the wrath about to come my way but I also hope she takes a moment to hear me out.
Damn it though if she isn’t sexy as hell when she wants to kill me.
“You need to leave,” Nicola says, pointing to the door.
“And never come back,” Kayla adds. “Asshole.”
“Wait a minute,” I say, standing at the end of the table with arms folded. I notice Steph’s eyes briefly going to my biceps and I feel like that just in itself is a tiny little victory. “Why are you all upset with me?”
They both look at Stephanie. I look at Stephanie.
She sighs and then says, “Guys, can you give us a minute?”
Kayla and Nicola exchange a long look and they don’t budge.
“Please,” Steph says, her voice tired. “It’s fine.”
“No it isn’t,” Kayla says and then glares at me. She’s remembering the times I loved her and left her, I know it.
“I just want to talk to her,” I say to her guard dog friends. “Honestly.”
Finally they both move and, as Nicola brushes past me, I say to her, “Maybe you want to take away any sharp objects,” but she just laughs.
Now that we’re alone, I don’t want to screw up. “Is it okay that I’m here?” I ask Steph, still standing there.
She shakes her head. “You’re the last person I want to see.”
“Can I at least explain what happened?”
She takes a defeated sip of her drink. “What difference would it make?”
I quickly sit down and reach out and grab her hand. She tries to pull it away but I hang on, squeezing it tight, relishing the feel if her warm, soft skin between my fingers. “It’s over,” I tell her. “I broke up with her. She moved out. It’s over.”
She swallows uneasily and looks away, at the old-fashioned paintings of fox hounds on the wall, all part of The Burgundy Lion’s original décor. Her mouth turns down in this sad, pronounced kind of way when she gets upset and I have to fight the urge to kiss that same mouth and make it sing. “Why are you telling me this?”
“Because,” I implore, the desperation sneaking up on me, “I want you to know that everything I told you, I meant. I want you and I’ve always wanted you. Not anyone else.”
She stiffens at that and then shoots me a furtive glance. “I broke up with Aaron.”
I nod and hope it comes across as sympathetic, not eager. “I know. Penny told me. I was going to end it with Nadine when I got home but then I found out she was evicted. She had nowhere to go. I didn’t know what to do. I just couldn’t do it then.”
“But you did it now…”
I grimace. “Yes. I did. I couldn’t wait. I couldn’t pretend.”
“Pretend what?” she asks and I can barely hear her soft voice above the noise of the bar.
“That I want nothing more than to put you on your back, on this table, and show you what it’s like to really get fucked.”
Her mouth drops open and she nearly laughs. I’ve caught her by surprise but she better get used to it.
“Linden,” she scolds.
“Kiss me.” I tell her. I’m all impulse now, feeling coiled up like a snake and ready to strike. I want her so damn bad.
Troubled, she yanks her hand out of mine and scooches back along the bench, further away from me. “Hold on, this is getting out of line.”