The Other P-Word(59)

"Maybe the third date-you're already weird. Don't want to scare him off  too fast. Either way, it's not when that's important, but what you tell  him. Tell him there was a guy once who loved you even though he had a  broken heart. Tell him if he doesn't treat you right, he'll be hearing  from me. Because I may not haunt you, but I will for damn sure haunt  him."

"You're not going to haunt anyone because you'll be just fine. I'm going to go get a coffee."

"Get me one too," Evan said.

"Nice try."

I stood up but he grabbed my arm pulling me back down. He planted a kiss on my cheek. "Your hair is messy."

"Are you going to fix it for me?"

"No, it looks like you just got fucked good. I like it that way."

I laughed, combing through the strands. Short hair was at least easier to finger comb.



* * * *



My steps became shaky as I walked back with my coffee. First I heard the  sounds. Derek's familiar voice called out commands. Then I saw people  rushing in and out of Evan's room. They wheeled him out so fast, I  almost slipped stepping out of the away. The coffee fell from my hand,  sloshing in a puddle around me.

"Derek!" I screamed, tugging his coat. "What's happening?"

"His heart stopped. We have to perform the surgery now."

"But … "

Derek took my shoulders and pulled me toward a wall. "Listen, it's  nothing you did. These things happen. Dr. Reddy is on his way. I have to  go, but as soon as I know something I'll tell you."

I crumpled to the floor, my hands shaking. The image of Evan unconscious haunted me.

I don't know how long I lay there in the hospital corridor. It was Derek that helped me up and led me to the waiting room.

"They'll be here soon," he said. He added more comforting words before  he left. I had no idea what he said though. I only heard my own voice  screaming inside my head.

Don't die, Evan, it begged. Don't turn away from me. Don't leave me.

Time passed slowly. A familiar scent surrounded me … expensive cologne.  "You ever notice how we always end up in hospitals?" Dillon said.

I wrapped my arms around him. "What are you doing here?"

"We couldn't let you go through this alone," Mom said, taking the other seat.

"You couldn't get rid of us if you tried," Stevie said, taking the seat across from me.

"That's good, because I would never try."

"Marley and Rick would have been here too, but Isabella's too young to  travel yet. She's not taking to a bottle well, but Marley wants you to  call her and for some reason she wanted me to give you this." Stevie set  a Zesty bar in my lap. It was just a protein bar, but I knew it was  more than that for Marley. The bar was symbol of love, like the leaf  pendant that hung from my neck. It was the very thing Rick gave her to  tell her he was there for her. She was telling me the same thing.                       
       
           



       

Evan's uncle, Grandma Fern, Mike and Tilla each hugged me. We took up  the whole waiting room. They boy who thought he had no one actually had a  whole waiting room full of people who were praying for him.

"Billie, thank you for taking care of him," Grandma Fern said.

"He takes care of me too," I replied.

She nodded. "I don't know what it means, but when I told my husband  about Evan, he said he was lucky to have you. He told me to tell you  that you make a good thorn."

"I know exactly what it means. I really appreciate that."

"Well maybe one day you can explain it to me."

"Sure. Tell him thank you. How did you all get here?" I asked, blinking in disbelief.

"Your stepdad owns a jet. We flew in style," Mike said.

Adam stood by the fish tank. "You ever think that these guys think we're in the fish tank and here for their amusement?"

"I don't know." The sound of laughter felt good.

"Have you eaten?" Mom asked.

"No."

"I'll get you something," Adam offered.

Mike handed me a package. "Billie, this is from Evan. He wanted me to give it to you."

"He gave you an iPod for me?"

"Listen."

I put on the ear buds. I scrolled to the only playlist-Billie's  soundtrack. The Fray's You Found Me came on. Except it wasn't The Fray.  It was Evan's voice. The track was followed with a statement.

"I didn't know what I could do help you during this time. I figured you  might be going a little crazy. Mike suggested this. I picked each of  these songs because they are part of me. The part of me that became real  with you. Part of who we are. I love you. No matter how this turns out,  know that I love you, Billie Marie. You are my best friend. You are my  angel. You are my girl."

I surrendered to the music, Evan's words and my mother's comforting  arms. The hours passed. I looked around the room, happy that Evan's  family and my family were all here. As far as I was concerned, Evan was  my family.

"Mom, I love him so much."

"I know, baby."

We all grew silent when Dr. Reddy made his way down the long corridor.  Why the hell was it such a damn long walk? My heartbeat thundered with  the thud of each of his steps. I squeezed my eyes shut and said one  final prayer.





Chapter Forty-One





"Happy anniversary," I said to Tilla and Mike. This time it was Mike  who'd decorated the bar with twinkling lights. They hung from every eave  and all the tables were dressed in white linens with candles in the  centers.

"It's hard to believe it's been another year," Mike replied, putting his arm around Tilla.

And what a year it was.

"That bar looks beautiful," I said, embracing Tilla.

"Yes, we're trying out a new look. It's romantic, don't you think?"

"Absolutely … stunning."

"Speaking of romance, I meant to tell you I read the book, Billie. I  loved how you dedicated it to Evan. I think I cried more at the  dedication than the story."

"Me too," Mike added.

"Well, he helped me write a lot of it," I said, clutching the gold leaf that hung on my neck.

"We're going to get going," Mike said.

"Don't worry about a thing. The bar's in good hands with me."

Tilla smiled, taking my hand. "Actually, we're closed tonight."

"Why?" It was Friday night-our busiest night.

"For a private function," Evan said, setting down a bottle of wine on the polished counter.

I sighed with gratitude, as I did every time I saw him. The recovery  hadn't been easy, but he'd fought like hell, as he'd promised. He worked  hard. Now, he looked healthier than I'd ever seen him. The flex of his  muscular arms was visible through his shirt. His sandy hair was shorter,  but still long enough for me to tug. His eyes had a new vibrancy. The  piercing in his eyebrow that he'd removed for the tests was back. It  turned me on so much, but it looked strange tonight with his formal  dress.

"Why are you wearing a suit?"

He shrugged. "I remember you once telling me you liked a man in a suit." He turned toward Mike. "Happy anniversary, guys."                       
       
           



       

"That's our cue," Tilla said, heading toward the door. Mike followed behind her, humming Closing Time.

"That was a long time ago and my tastes have changed."

"Good, 'cause this isn't exactly an everyday thing, but tonight's special."

"Why?"

"This is our anniversary too, Billie Marie."

"It is?"

"It's not a great one, but I hope to change the meaning of this day for  both of us. One year ago tonight I turned away from you. I said things  that I can never take back, but I hope I can make enough good memories  to replace that day."

"You already have."

He walked over to the jukebox. He swore as he fumbled with his pockets.

"Evan, what are you doing?"

"I'm fixing to dance with you. I remembered the lights and the wine. I forgot the quarter."

"You did the lights?"

"Sure did."

I fished a coin from my pocket, handing it to him. His song came on-the  one he'd written for us-for me-A Little Romance. The same song that was  played by one of the hottest bands in large venues and on the radio,  inching its way up the billboard charts.

"Thank you. You always got my back, Price."

"And every other part of you."

He took me in his arms. I stood on my tippy-toes, leaning against him as  he swayed us. My excitement was boiling over, a simmering pot set on  high. I had an inkling what this might be.

"I was worried about you today," I whispered, running a finger through his hair.

"Why?"

"You said you had errands to run, but you didn't tell me what they were. You haven't done that in a long time."