"Yeah, me too."
He turned the board around away from the land. He cradled me in his arms as we watched the sun leisurely dip into the horizon.
"I can't believe I'm looking at something this beautiful."
"Me either," he said. When I titled my head back, he was looking at me.
"I called my mom today."
"Oh yeah, how is she?"
"Good. Everyone's fine. I had something to tell her."
"What's that?"
"That I'm not craving chocolate as much as I used to."
"Does that mean something?"
"To me it does."
I said a silent prayer that it did to him too.
Chapter Thirty-One
I lay on my belly reading. I felt his hands first as they ran across the backs of my bare legs and over my bottom. He was fresh from the shower, the clean scent of soap washed over me as he pushed up the hem of my T-shirt and rubbed my back.
"What are you reading?" he asked, kissing my shoulder.
"A romance novel."
"Is there fucking?"
"Yes, loads of it. Crazy monkey sex."
Evan's low rumble of laughter was more sensual than anything in the book. "Are you at one of those crazy monkey sex scenes now?"
"Nope."
"Want to be?"
I tilted my head. His eyes had that lustful quality that triggered all my hedonistic tendencies. "Yes, please."
I sat up and took off my T-shirt. He slid my legs back so I was flat on my belly again. His fingers grazed my skin as he took off my panties.
He straddled my back, kneading my shoulders and arms. Then he stretched my arms back.
"What are you doing?"
"Stretching is really important, Billie Marie. I don't want you to get hurt. Don't be scared."
"I wasn't until you said that."
"You remember your safe word?"
"Yes, do you?"
He was quiet for a second before he chuckled. "Now I get why you said chocolate when I tried to call you."
"Yeah."
"I'll be listening better this time. Relax for me."
I laid my head on the pillow while his touch aroused each muscle. He traced my spine with his tongue all the way down, licking my lower back. He rubbed my ass in a slow circular motion. And his finger …
"Where is your finger?" I asked, tensing up.
"Where do you think? Why don't we narrate for a minute? It might help you get more comfortable."
"Okay. She wondered where his finger was … and oh God, now his tongue."
"Original," he said dryly.
"I'm having a hard time being creative right now."
"You've never done this?"
"No."
"I figured."
He rubbed my bottom again, kissing his way across it. "Billie Marie, I ask you with the utmost respect if I may take your back end virtue."
I debated for a second but his tongue moved again. I forgot what I was supposed to be debating in the first place.
"Yes."
I could feel the press of his smile against my ass. "I'm going to go slow, but if you want me to change it up then speak up. Say faster, slower or stop in this case. Got it?"
"Faster, slower or stop. I got it."
"Good girl. I'm going to help you narrate. We'll do it together."
I made an affirmative squeak, letting Evan's seductive voice carry me.
"He knew this was taboo for her. As much as she trusted him with her body, she was nervous about this."
I moaned as his finger penetrated me. "Despite that, she did have a carnal curiosity."
"He wanted to satisfy that curiosity. But he'd be gentle. He'd let her set the pace. He'd walk whatever line she marked. It wouldn't be easy for him. He'd admired her beautiful ass for such a long time. He wanted to show her that everything he did to her was in the pursuit of pleasure."
He licked me again. The bed dipped as he got on his knees. He put an arm under me, lifting me until I was on my knees too. He used lube … lots of it. The penetration wasn't as bad as I thought.
"Ready for more?"
Holy hard-on. He wasn't all the way in?
"Yes," I managed between pants.
He rubbed my back as his cock went deeper. He kissed my shoulders. I felt his fullness as it enveloped me.
"You feel so fucking good," he whispered in my ear. I needed his dirty talk right now. He traced the shell of my ear before placing a strand of hair behind it.
He pushed my legs farther apart and moved slowly, as he'd promised. Each of his grunts signaled a yearning to move forward with more conviction. I wanted to go with him. I gripped the bed sheets in my hand with such force that the fitted sheet unfitted itself.
"Faster," I panted.
His rhythm quickened. Evan's arms tightened on my hips. I began enjoying it. Especially the way he groaned my name with each thrust. The way his lips trailed down my back. His hands came up my sides and cupped my breasts, pulling my back against his chest.
"You still with me?"
"Yes … oh yes, Evan."
I turned my head and met his lips, getting drunk on them. He massaged my clit, sending my body into shivers.
I looked into his eyes. His expression held me in a trance.
"Fastest."
He stopped moving and shook his head. "You don't know what you're asking for."
"I want it."
He stared at me as if he wanted confirmation. "I'm sure."
A wicked smile flickered over his face. "Put your head down on the pillow, Billie Marie."
Confirmation achieved.
I rested my face into the pillow.
"No, baby, head to the side. And bring your arms around your back."
As I got into position, I realized this was much like a policeman's hold. Was he arresting me? He bent over me, biting my shoulder softly while caressing my hair.
He sat back on his legs, clasping my wrists tightly in each of his hands. He stretched my arms all the way back. I shut my eyes. The steadiness of his pace increased slowly. His groans signaled a yearning. They quickened along with his pace until he couldn't hold back. He propelled, using my own arms for leverage to deepen his thrusts. I let out a scream that lived in that perfect realm between pain and pleasure.
"Billie?"
"Don't stop."
He didn't. My body was drenched in sweat. His was dripping. The rapid pace, the risqué position, the tender way he said my name all brought me to a higher place. He didn't fuck me or make love to me. Evan ravished me-and I loved being ravished.
I felt the waves of pleasure take me. He pulled me back against his chest again, a chest that was now slick. He cupped my chin, moving my mouth toward his.
His breaths were harsh. His words were harsher. Three simple words that complicated all my hopes and cast shadows of doubt on everything we'd shared.
"Heat on high. That's what we are, baby."
Chapter Thirty-Two
The air in Chicago felt different. The breeze, laced with an underlying crispness, created an uneasy feeling. Evan and I didn't talk about that night. But I was sure he knew how hurt I was by his ‘heat on high' comment. Nothing sexier, or more meaningful, than comparing a girl to a microwave meal. He gave me so many mixed signals-if Evan Wright were a traffic light, he'd cause a massive pile-up.
"What are you doing out here?" he asked, coming through his window with a bowl for Buddy in his hand. The dark night made him nothing more than a shadow. "It's cold."
"Just thinking," I said, twirling the stem of a leaf in my hand.
"Need a penny, or will you share freely?"
I brought my legs up to my chest, encircling my arms around them. "I went out with Mike today. We bought Tilla's gift."
He sat next to me. "What did y'all get her?"
"You'll see."
"It's not my anniversary. You don't have to keep it a secret from me."
"Since you didn't come with us, you'll have to wait and see."
"I'm sorry I couldn't go. I had errands."
"Where do you go on your errands?"
He clasped his hands together, staring at the starless sky. "To the cemetery. You already knew that though."
"The whole time?"
"I work out too, at a gym." Well, one look at his body and that was clear. "Sometimes I go for long ride or to the park to read. Mostly, I just think about things."
He went to the park to read? Why didn't he invite me? That right there was my idea of a perfect day. The park on a nice day, lying on Evan with a book in my hand. Careful, Billie … you're treading dangerous waters.