I watch Seb, throw Finn up onto his shoulders and the men all walk ahead of us, in the direction of our surprise activity. He is entirely enigmatic, always the head of the pack. Strong and controlling and safe, yet I am fortunate to be privy to his quiet side, the side of him which many rarely gain a glimpse of.
“We’re here, Lu - are you going to tell Finn the surprise?” Seb shouts to me with a big grin.
My eyes focus on my boy happily clapping his hands together, perched high on top of Seb, and I run to catch them up. “We…lll, Finny Finn Finn, you know how you always wanted to drive a car?”
His eyes go as wide as saucers and I can’t contain my excitement. Abby and Suzie have caught us up by this point and Suzie is doing a drum roll noise for extra drama. “You’re going to go off-roading in a mini land rover!”
“No way - like Sub’s?”
“Not quite like Seb’s no, but similar.”
“On my own?”
“Well, no there will be an instructor and Seb and I will be with you too but you’ll be behind the wheel.”
“Cool!” Seb places him down on the ground and he runs full pelt at me, wrapping his arms around my waist in a tight bear hug. “You’re the best Mummy ever!”
My heart melts as I plant a kiss on his head and we head off at a run to the driving centre. The others tagging behind. God I hope these instructors knew what they were doing! I couldn't back out and say no now.
The afternoon’s craziness goes down extremely well with Finn but after two hours of off-roading, in both mini and full-sized Land Rovers we have to call it a day. I felt exhilarated and had without a doubt been bitten by the rallying bug. I check my watch and with a wince remind Sebastian that we have to meet Niall back at Reception soon. I’m starting to regret agreeing to my ex having our son this weekend now, especially as we were enjoying ourselves so much but I know that he’s had an amazing time and although I’ll miss him, Seb and I can have some adult time and tonight we’ll be able to sleep in the same room together. Not that we’ll get much sleep I hope.
Under much duress Finn is convinced to leave his driving days behind, well at least until he’s 17 and the three of us, wave goodbye to the rest of the gang, who are heading off to attempt Falconry and Archery in the nearby field. As we head inside, I see Niall has already arrived and is enjoying afternoon tea in the library with his girlfriend Karen. I feel Seb’s hand in the small of my back, it gives me strength and we make our way towards them.
“Hello, son. Come, give your Dad a hug.”
Niall smiles openly at Finn and it pleases me. He looks genuinely happy to see him and going by Finn’s run-and-barge cuddle, the feeling is mutual. It’s all I want for them; consistency for my son and a healthy relationship with his Dad. So he was a shit boyfriend, he can be a better father can’t he?
Karen’s large brown eyes are assessing my every move, from her cocooned position in the corner, near the window. She audaciously looks me up and down, addressing my clothing, hairstyle, the way Sebastian and I interact with one another; I feel practically stripped bare but at the same time I understand why and I feel sorry for her. She is madly in love with a man who cheats and she knows she’ll never have him completely. I have breasts and a vagina and on top of that I have history with him, and a child, so I was quadruple-trouble competition. If only she realised that she was truly welcome to him. I would never be with Niall again, not now that I’ve had a taste of how a real man fucks.
I remember her nasty words, mentioned in front of my son a few weeks ago at their house and I narrow my eyes. Stupid Beach - Finn had relayed it back to me, not understanding the meaning. Stupid bitch was more like it. “Karen, how nice to see you.”
Her shocked expression at my pleasant greeting quickly disappears as she recovers well. “Lucia. Grand place.”
“It is isn’t it? I’ve been fortunate enough to work on this for the past few weeks.”
She sips her coffee slowly, considering her words. “Can’t be bad - can it, Niall? You must be doing all right.”
“It’s been fabulous but not without its issues, as every job has - matching up the original woodwork, which was a lovely old beech, has been a real bitch but we’ve not been talking about it in front of the client’s tender ears or there’d be hell to pay! It would be a stupid error.”
I watch her eyebrows disappear into her rather high hairline. There you go love - has it sunk in? Yes? Now you get what I’m trying to say don’t you? You’re brighter than I thought. Let’s get this all out in the open and start afresh so you can get on with your relationship and my son can enjoy his time with his father and you, if you want that. I’m not competition.