The Maverick Cowboy(23)

"BB." Chase started to stand as well, his voice quiet. "Give him a chance, okay? We're all trying to help you out here."

Jenna took Blue's hand. "Will you walk me out to my truck? I really have to go or Uncle Ron will be calling Nate to round up a search party."

January winked. "I'm sure Nate would be more than happy to come and find you, Jenna." 

She grinned as Jenna led Blue out into the cold night air and down the steps to where her truck was parked. He let her lead, which was a first, and stopped obediently beside her as she went to open the door.

"Thanks for a great-"

The rest of what she had been going to say was devoured by his kiss, which tasted of peaches and hot man-a combination that was rapidly becoming her all-time favorite. Her back was against the truck and his body covered her completely, one of his hands anchored around her hips and the other tangled in her hair.

She fought to free one hand from between them and wrapped it around his neck, holding on to all that lean-muscled power for dear life. God, he was beautiful. It was like petting a jaguar. There was nothing else in her vision than Blue's face and the thrilling sensation of his mouth moving over hers. Eventually, even she had to breathe and she broke off the kiss and buried her face in the crook of his neck.

He held her close, his breathing slowing down along with hers, the tension in his body easing-apart from that one hard bit of him that she kind of longed to explore, but didn't quite have the nerve to attempt. In typical Blue fashion, he took her hand and solved that problem by guiding her fingers around him until he groaned.

"That was not a good idea," he breathed out hard against her forehead.

"You made me do it."

"I couldn't help myself."

She petted him just a little until his hips rolled against her, and he hissed a soft curse. Taking her hand, he placed it within his own and drew it down to her side.

"I want you." His blunt statement didn't surprise her. He was a man used to getting what he wanted when he wanted it. "But this really isn't good timing."

"So you said."

"I have to take care of Maria first."

"I know."

He searched her face. "You're making this very easy for me."

She attempted a shrug-difficult when your whole body was plastered over a man's hard unyielding torso. "It's all good. We're still only kissing, and I'm officially going out with Nate."

"No, you are not." His blue eyes struck sparks.

"I believe that is up to me, Blue Morgan."

He sighed. "Jeez, I can't believe I'm saying this, but he's a nice guy. You probably would be better off with him."

As her stomach dropped with disappointment, she gave him her sweetest smile. "I am. He's my only boyfriend, remember?"

"The way you just kissed me? I don't think so, sweetheart."

She shoved on his chest until he took an unwilling step back. There really was nothing left to lose, and she was determined that things wouldn't always run on his schedule. It was good for him to be thwarted occasionally.

"You can't have it both ways. You either stand aside and let me go out with Nate, or you ask me out yourself."

His jaw settled into a stubborn line she was becoming way too familiar with. "I just explained why that can't happen right now, and you said you understood."

"I do understand."

"Then what exactly are we talking about?"

"It would be better for both of us if you focus on Maria and I focus on my job."

He cocked his head to one side and observed her. "So what you're saying is no more kissing unless we're a couple?"

"Exactly."

His slow grin held such a mixture of lust and devilry that she almost melted on the spot.

"Right. Got it."

"And you understand why I won't be kissing you anymore?"



       
         
       
        

"Totally." He nodded. "It's only fair."

"Then we're on the same page. Night then, Blue."

She nodded to him and went to get in her truck. Damn, she'd been way too confident, thinking he wouldn't want to stop kissing her just because she couldn't imagine not doing it anymore herself. She should know by now that she wasn't hard to give up. She'd never been special enough for anyone.

A tap on her window made her look up from fishing her keys out of her pocket to find Blue looking in on her. With a sigh, she rolled down the window. In her old truck, he was tall enough to be almost at her eye level.

"Drive safe and be careful at Mark Lymond's place tomorrow, okay?"

She managed a nod.

His smile disappeared. "Are you really okay?"

"Peachy."

He took her tightly clenched fist in his hand and studied it. "You don't look it." He brought her fingers to his mouth and lightly kissed them. "Night, Jenna. Take care now."

She disengaged her hand and turned the wheel, reversing the truck in a wide arc around him, her lights sweeping over the slumbering barn and waking up the indignant chickens. He was still standing there as she bumped down the road, his gaze fixed on the departing truck.

She eased her fingers on the steering wheel, aware that somewhere inside her tears threatened. He'd told her the truth, which was more than most men did, and he had good, valid reasons why he couldn't currently get involved in a relationship with her. Was it too much to ask that one day, just one day, she would be the most important person in the world for someone?

"And why can't men be like women and multitask?" She asked the question to the still night air. "Why can't Blue do me and everything else at the same time?"

She didn't have the answer and was being stupid, and unrealistic, and romantic, and all those other things that had been pointed out to her countless times in family therapy sessions. She knew that she did have worth, that the fact that her birth parents hadn't wanted her, that her two sisters were way more intelligent than her, that she was smart, but not brilliant were all unimportant unless she believed at her core she had worth herself...

Like it was easy.

Maybe it was her fault. She seemed to be the only one in her adopted family who still struggled to feel accepted and loved. But then the others didn't really know what her earlier life had been like, and even worse, what had happened when she'd made the mistake of searching for her birth parents.

She stopped to open the final gate out onto the county road, drove through, and locked it behind her. None of this was Blue's fault. It really did come down to her and her stupid insecurities. One thing she did know was that Maria had to come first, and if that meant keeping away from the lure of Blue Morgan's kisses? She could do that. 

Or at least she hoped she could.





Chapter Ten

"Billy . . ." Blue tried to catch his father's eye. "I think I can handle this."

To his surprise, Billy just kept right on walking down to the barn, his hand securely in Maria's. Normally, he would do whatever Blue said just to avoid an argument, so his championship of the little girl was as unexpected as it was unwelcome.

"Maria asked me to come along," Billy finally said over his shoulder.

"I bet she did." Blue ended up following meekly behind. "But I thought this would be a good way for her and me to spend some time together."

Billy patted Maria's shoulder. "Go ahead and find some of those old apples to feed the horses. I'll catch up with you in the barn. Don't go into any of the stalls, now."

After a quick anxious glance at Blue, Maria nodded and ran off, her pigtails bouncing.

Billy turned to Blue. "She's still a bit overwhelmed by all this."

"I get that. But I also want a chance to get to know her."

"I'm not stopping you doing that, BB." Billy held his gaze.

"You're-" Blue sighed. "Hell-you're better at it than I am. That's the God honest truth."

"I had five kids. I learned a lot before I shot myself in the foot and lost you all." Billy hesitated. "I think I spent more time with you boys than your mother did. It was hard for her. She hated the ranch. All I tried to do was show you what a great place it was to grow up-just like my father did to me."

Blue looked down at the ground, cleared his throat, and swallowed his pride. "Yeah, so how about we both teach her how to ride? It's the only way she's going to be willing to spend any time with me."

"She'll come around, BB. She's lost a lot in the last few weeks."

"I know how that feels."

They had reached the barn, and he could see Maria feeding Nolly an apple and talking away in the horse's ear. At least she wasn't scared of the horses anymore. Billy had already coaxed her out of that.

"Which horse do you think, Billy?"

"Sugar Lump. She's old and reliable."

"Just like Ruth."

Billy chuckled. "Don't let your grandma hear you say that." He raised his voice. "Hey, Maria, are you ready for your first lesson? Me and BB are going to turn you into a real cowgirl."

* * *

Hearing voices, Jenna walked through the barn and out into the fenced pasture beyond, where she could see Maria sitting in front of Blue on Sugar Lump, walking slowly around the inside of the white fence. Both of them were smiling, and if she'd been asked to put money on the fact that they were related she would've paid up immediately.