It was time. Time to suck it up and own up to his past.
But first, he needed to be shit-faced so he wouldn't have to remember the look of horror on her face when he told her.
By the time he headed back to the room, Tyke was so drunk he barely remembered the journey. He cradled his arm against his chest, groaning each time he bashed it into something. Like the wall. Then the door. Tyke pulled out his key card and tried to slide it into the lock.
He missed.
Tried again.
Nope.
And again.
Not that time.
Bending, he closed one eye and slowly glided the card toward the door. It wobbled but finally landed where it needed to. The door clicked, the sensor lit up green, so he turned the handle and entered their dark hotel room.
Something must've jumped out in front of him, because he lost his balance. "Shit." He stumbled a few steps, his body starting to tilt forward. His hand landed on something soft, most likely the bed. Turning, he sat and waited for the room to stop spinning.
It didn't.
"Kenna," he said in a loud whisper. "Kenna, you awake?"
Silence came from her side of the bed.
His eyes finally adjusted to the dark, which allowed him to see the outline of her sleeping body, facing the window. She was curled with the blankets up to her neck. That red hair he loved was piled high on her head again, making him want to reach over and pull the tie out to let the strands fan over her pillow.
"Kenna?" he tried again. "Need to talk to you. Wake up."
Tyke scooted back, adjusting himself onto his side of the bed without hurting his shoulder more in the process and rolled toward her.
"You awake yet?" He waited for a response.
All that came back was soft, steady breaths.
"I'm sorry," he mumbled. "So sorry. You deserve better. And you're going to get it. I promise." He reached down and started to unbutton his shirt so it wouldn't be wrinkled for the wedding, but he couldn't get his fingers to cooperate. He leaned to her ear. "You're so good. I love you so much. But I'm no good for you. You need a real man. Not me."
He let out a long yawn. "Nothing like me. I'm no good."
And then he closed his eyes, rolled onto his good shoulder, and passed out.
Chapter Twenty
The sun felt hotter today. The temperature could've increased on the island, or it could've been because Kenna was confused as hell, which made her annoyed with everything around her.
He said he loved her. Loved her.
But that she deserved better.
Better how?
She wanted to ask him about it this morning, but when she woke up, his side of the bed was empty. Which was when she called Aunt Estelle and asked to meet her at the beach.
The two women lounged on beach chairs, gazing out from under an umbrella at the glassy, blue water. A table full of food and drinks sat between them, and was refilled by one of the hotel workers who knew her aunt by name.
Kenna eyed Estelle, who seemed cheerful as she sipped her vodka water and popped bits of fruit into her mouth. Estelle's free hand was draped above her head on the chair, making the flowy sleeves of her colorful cover-up billow loosely around her arms. She wore a black one-piece bathing suit under the sheer fabric with matching black shades and sun hat.
"You don't seem very upset about your brooch being stolen," Kenna said.
"Huh? What?" Estelle covered her mouth to cough up the small grape that must have lodged in her throat. "Of course I'm upset. You know how much that thing means to me."
"I do. Which is why I've been thinking," she said. "We should go back to security. There's this guy, Al. He-"
"Why? I thought Bryan was working his spy magic to find it."
"He's a DEA agent, not a spy." Then she caught herself. She didn't give a crap if he was the president of the United States. What did it matter? It didn't. He still couldn't find her mom's ring or Estelle's brooch. It was useless. They'd all leave this island with a piece of themselves snatched away and never returned. "He had a lot of leads but hasn't found anything besides a bunch of dead ends."
"There's still time," Estelle said.
"Time?" Kenna almost laughed. "For what? The thief to get away? 'Cause right now, that's about all Bear has been good for."
Her aunt turned to her with one eyebrow lifted above her wide-rimmed sunglasses. "Really? That's all?"
Kenna fidgeted under Estelle's probing gaze. "Yes. Why do you say it like that?"
"Hun," she said and popped a small, round melon ball into her mouth. Chewing, she said, "I've been at this game a hell of a long time, so I've learned to recognize the glow of a woman who's been fully sexed up. And you, my dear, have been more than sexed up." Estelle grinned, wiping a small dribble of juice from the corner of her mouth. "He gave it to you straight up, didn't he? Like a wild animal? The man's got vigor, that much is evident."
Kenna sucked in a quick, seizure-inducing breath. "Aunt Estelle! He most certainly did not give it to me straight up, sideways, or any other direction. We're not having this conversation!"
Estelle shrugged. "Whatever you say."
Kenna crossed her arms and let her pout come out in full force. How was her aunt able to read that so effortlessly? Did everyone else figure it out, too? Oh God. Was everyone talking about the fact that she and Bear were back together? That when this week was over, they might give it another go?
That was most definitely not happening. She wasn't trusting him with her heart ever again. And she wasn't going through the embarrassment of pining away for him again.
She glanced at her aunt's calculated smirk. "Whatever you're thinking, get it out of your mind right now."
"What?" Estelle said, still grinning like the Cheshire cat. "I'm not thinkin' nothin'."
"You are. I can see it on your face. Stop it."
"There might be somethin' there. He might've changed. Any man-even the slow ones-can improve after more than a decade." She tipped her chin up and in a proud voice, she said, "Kenna, men are like fine wine-"
She flashed a palm. "No infamous Estelle Vavrino analogies needed."
"Okay, but let me add that men aren't good with fragile things," Estelle said. "Them and their big, dumb hands. Always fumblin' everything."
"Exactly," Kenna said. "That's what I'm saying. Bear-"
The playfulness in Estelle's features dimmed and was replaced with something much more serious. It was an expression Kenna hadn't seen on her aunt's face before.
She didn't want Estelle saying something to make her soften. She didn't want some wise piece of advice to induce her to forgive Bear. She couldn't. It would hurt too much.
"Hun," Estelle said through a sigh.
"Don't take his side," she snapped. "Don't you dare take his side."
Aunt Estelle's eyes hardened. "Watch your tone with me, young lady. You wanna beat up that man who loves you, you go right ahead. But you won't treat me that way." She paused to narrow her eyes. "He did finally tell you he loves you, right?"
Kenna slumped back in her chair and harrumphed. "He came in drunk last night and said it."
"Huh. I figured he'd pickled himself so bad he'd be useless." Estelle let out a small chuckle. "Always nice to be wrong for the right reasons." She turned to Kenna. "So? What did you say back?"
"Nothing. I pretended to be asleep."
The older woman sat up, facing Kenna with her bare feet planted in the sand. "Why the hell would you do that?"
"First of all, he was drunk," she said. "I wasn't going to have that conversation with someone who wouldn't remember half of it later. Plus, I was still pissed at him. He hurt me, Aunt Estelle. Bad. I can't just-"
"You can," she said, reaching across for Kenna's hand. "You can let it go. In fact, you need to."
This was the one person Kenna thought would understand. How many men had Kenna seen come and go in her aunt's life? None of them staying very long before Estelle was done with one and moving on to the next. Aunt Estelle knew how stupid and untrustworthy men could be.
She spun on her chair so fast, it was a wonder she didn't topple onto the sand. Meeting Kenna's stare, Estelle said, "Don't be like me. Don't let days, months, or years pass without sharing yourself with someone. One special man. Don't wake up my age and wish you'd done something sooner. You get one chance at doing this right. I don't wanna see you end up like me."
"But … but you're fantastic." Kenna couldn't believe what she was hearing. She'd be honored to end up like the woman in front of her when she was old and gray. "You're funny. Off the wall. Spontaneous. Strong-willed."
"And lonely." Estelle gave a forced, half-hearted smile. "I'm lonely, hun. And I'll be that way until the good Lord calls me home. Don't follow in my footsteps. Forgive that man and give him your heart. All of it. Love him and let him love you back. Life's too damn short to be angry forever."