“You shall take all the spring out of it,” she said. “My maid will be so disappointed.”
Ian blinked, then returned his hand to the arm of his chair as though having to force it.
“Did you love your husband?”
This bizarre encounter with Lord Ian was the sort of thing she would have had a good laugh over with Thomas. But Thomas was gone, years ago, and she was alone.
“With all my heart.”
“I wouldn’t expect love from you. I can’t love you back.” Beth plied her fan to her hot face, her heart stumbling.
“Hardly flattering, my lord, for a woman to hear a man won’t fall in love with her. She likes to believe she will be the center of his abject devotion.”
Mather had said he’d be devoted. The crumpled letter burned her again.
“Not won’t. I can’t love you.”
“I beg your pardon?” She’d been using the phrase so often tonight.
“I am incapable of love. I will not offer it to you.” Beth wondered what was more heartbreaking, the words themselves or the flat tone of voice with which he delivered them. “Perhaps you simply haven’t found the right lady, my lord. Everyone falls in love sooner or later.” “I have taken women as lovers, but never loved them.” Beth’s face heated. “You make no sense, my lord. If you don’t care about my fortune or whether I love you, why on earth do you wish to marry me?”
Ian reached for the curl again as though he couldn’t stop himself. “Because I want to bed you.”
Beth knew in that instant that she was not a true lady, and never would be. A true lady would have fallen out of her chair in a gentle swoon or screamed down the opera house. Instead, Beth leaned into Ian’s touch, liking it. “Do you?” His hand loosened more curls, rendering the maid’s work useless. “You were a vicar’s wife, respectable, the sort to be married. Otherwise, I would offer a liaison.” Beth resisted rubbing her face against his glove. “Have I got this right? You want me to come to your bed, but because I was once a respectable married lady, you must marry me in order to get me there?”
“Yes.”
She gave a half-hysterical laugh. “My dear Lord Ian, don’t you think that a bit extreme? Once you’d had me in your bed, you’d still be married to me.”
“I planned to bed you more than once.”
It sounded so logical when he said it. His deep voice slid through her senses, tempting her, finding the passionate woman who’d discovered how much she loved touching a man’s body and having that man touch her. Ladies were not supposed to enjoy the marriage bed, so she’d been told. Thomas had said that was nonsense, and he’d taught her what a woman could feel. If he’d not taught her so well, she reflected, she’d not be sitting here boiling with need for Lord Ian Mackenzie.
“You do realize, my lord, that I am engaged to another man? I have only your word that he is a philanderer.” “I will give you time to make inquiries about Mather and put your affairs in order. Would you prefer to live in London or my estate in Scotland?”
Beth wanted to lay her head back on her chair and laugh and laugh. This was too absurd, and at the same time dismayingly tempting. Ian was attractive; she was alone. He was rich enough not to care about her little fortune, and he made no secret that he wanted to enjoy carnal knowledge of her. But if she truly knew so little about Lyndon Mather, she knew nothing at all about Ian Mackenzie.
“I’m still puzzled,” she managed to say. “A friendly warning about Sir Lyndon is one thing, but to warn me and then offer me marriage in the space of minutes another. Do you always make up your mind so quickly?”
“Yes.”
“ ‘If it were done when ‘tis done, then ‘twere well it were done quickly’? That sort of thing?”
“You can refuse.”
“I think I should.”
“Because I’m a madman?”
She gave another breathless laugh. “No, because it is too enticing, and because I’ve drunk whiskey, and I should return to Sir Lyndon and his aunt.”
She rose, skirts rustling, but Lord Ian grasped her hand.
“Don’t go”
The words were harsh, not a plea. The strength left Beth’s limbs and she sat down again. It was warm here, and the chair was oh, so comfortable. “I shouldn’t stay.”
His hand closed over hers. “Watch the opera.” Beth forced her gaze to the stage, where the soprano was singing passionately about a lost lover. Tears gleamed on the singer’s face, and Beth wondered if she were thinking about Lord Cameron Mackenzie.