“Daddy, you know we have to go to the doctor today, what are you doing still taking your sweet time to eat, come on now, let’s get dressed!”
She gave him a smile as he chuckled and made his way to his room to get dressed. She moved around the room easily enough, gathering necessary paperwork and pay stubs. There was always so much they needed whenever they went to a new doctor so she was doing her very best to be as prepared as possible. She certainly didn’t want to have to do it again in a week. Finally he came out ready to go and they made their way downstairs to the car.
Their car was old and held together by a thread, she took a moment to do a prayer over it as always. Somehow by doing so, she felt like it would be more likely to start. It was something she had done for years and she did it once more. She went through the passenger side and crawled over to the driver’s seat; one of the many issues with the car was the door on the driver’s side was stuck. She waited for him to get settled and took a deep breath before she turned the key.
Ten minutes later, she was still waiting.
“Baby girl, you done flooded it. Just give it a few more minutes and give it another try, that’s all.”
He patted her hand that was gripping the wheel. She glanced down at her watch and sighed. They had ten minutes to get where they needed to be and she knew they would be late. She held her breath and turned the key one last time. With the roar of the engine, she smiled. Thankfully, they could get where they needed to go, even if they were a little late. She pulled out and made her way down the highway while her daddy hummed a song for the ride.
Chapter Two – Derek
Not again. He looked over at the clock on the wall and sighed. He couldn’t sleep, ever. He sat up and decided to make coffee instead. The last few months had been hard on him, ever since he had come back. He rarely slept and if he did, his sleep was riddled with dreams about everything he had seen in the war. He had only done two tours, but it had been enough. Enough to haunt him almost daily.
He was a doctor, and a good one. He had finished top of his class and took pride in his work. He had a genuine smile that put people at ease and he did his best to help the people who came to see him. He could help others, but doing what he needed to do for himself was the issue. He knew good and well that he needed to be seeing someone, someone he could talk out everything he dreamt about and what kept him awake at night. For whatever reason, he had yet to find that person. Perhaps part of it was because he felt that he could handle it on his own. Whatever the reasons, none of them were good and he knew it. Taking the step was proving to be difficult, but somehow he would have to find a way before it started affecting his work.
He liked being needed, it was probably what most women he had dated in the past would say was his worst quality. He had a hero complex, sure, but he rarely thought of it as a bad thing. More often than not, he found himself flashing a charming smile at a patient as he did his best to save the day. He wasn’t sure how to be any different. Helping people was engrained in him, a part of who he was. Most recently it had been Abigail, beautiful, curvy Abigail, who had left him in the wind because he was "never there". He could remember the conversation they had as if it were yesterday.
“Who are you really, Derek? I mean everything is so cookie cutter and perfect, it's unnerving. I didn’t sign up to have to stay up at night to worry about you and then spend my days not even knowing who you are!” She had ranted and raved until her pink cheeks were red.
He had stood there allowing her to vent. It had been common knowledge in his world, especially with four sisters, that when a woman is mad, just let her get it out. He waited and watched her. He eventually put together his thoughts enough to try to defend himself to her.
“Abigail, I am me, this is who I am. I’m not sure I understand what the problem is here. Have I done anything to hurt you or harm you?” His very matter-of-fact attitude didn’t help his plight.
“That’s just it Derek, if you had then this between us would at least be normal! I’m sorry, Derek, you’re not a bad guy… you’re just not here emotionally.” She kissed him on the cheek and he watched her leave for good.
That had been two months ago and aside from two individual dates, he was avoiding woman altogether, at least on a personal level. He supposed there should be some sadness about her leaving, some regret, but he felt none of those things. In fact, if he were honest, he was relieved to see her go. She was a nice girl, a great partner in bed, but they hadn’t connected, not really.
He knew part of what she felt was real. He was absent a lot of the time. Even sitting there, sipping his coffee, he had too much on his mind. He felt as though he couldn’t connect with women like he once had, perhaps the war was to blame for that too. The only time he could be himself was when he was at home, visiting his mother and sisters. They managed to bring his old self out of him. Maybe that’s what he needed, a trip home. Soon, maybe he would visit them. He looked up at the clock once more and made his way to the bedroom to shower. He may as well just get going to work. Even if he would be 2 hours early, it was better than sitting there with himself doing nothing.
***
He slipped on his lab coat once he arrived at the office. He loved his job, loved managing a team of people. He was friendly with everyone, at least he tried to be. He liked being able to work for people who really needed the help, not just wealthy people looking for a quick fix. He glanced down at the list for the day. They were packing them in tightly, trying to get as much people as much help as they could. Working at the clinic did have some drawbacks, but there was something about the true appreciation in the eyes of his patients that made him want to be there, to do more to help them.
Nurse Nancy went by and gave him a smile, as she passed he shook his head. He had been approached on more than one occasion by a nurse or two who would happily go out with him, but he never mixed work and pleasure, and they wouldn’t understand him, or his issues. It was better that he was alone, at least for now.
“Hey, Nancy, how was your weekend?” He gave her a smile.
“It was good, uneventful really.” She continued to smack her gum while responding. “How about you, sugar, how was yours?”
“Good, well, I’ll see you in a bit, Nancy.” He stood to head towards his office to read up on the first patient of the day.
“Sure thing, doc.” She moved on, passing him and heading to gather her things for the day.
Mondays were always busy, there were two Mondays a month when people could come in as new patients and the rest of the month they could only come if they had been seen there before. So often the caseload would triple as new people flooded the door looking for help. He would often have to weed out those looking for narcotics for recreational use, and those who needed specialized services he wasn’t qualified for. Mainly, they were just simply good people scraping by who couldn’t afford the rising cost of medical care. He grabbed the chart closest to him and went inside.
Chapter Three – Ciara
She knew it was going to take a while, but the wait was ridiculous. They had been asked questions about everything from birth to work and she was frustrated. She had a very small window before she had to get her Dad back home and she had to get to work. When they arrived, there had been a full lobby, people crammed into every nook of the room. The woman at the desk had even mentioned they may not get to them before the morning was over, and she had to stop herself from exploding.
She looked over at her Daddy and smiled at him as she patted his arm. He had been doing so well lately. He never complained about the cancer medication he was on, or mentioned the round of chemo he’d had when his insurance was intact. He never complained about anything. He had been the one constant in her life, him and her mother, until she passed away. She had been a wonderful woman; she was the lead in the church choir and had even been talked to about a record deal once, but she would never leave her home or her family. Her death had been a great tragedy for the family and a blow that had left her father frail and sad.
It was 5 years ago when the accident had happened. She had been driving home one evening from the market and had been hit by an oncoming car. The paperwork all blamed the bad weather that night, but the driver had been drinking. The police simply said the driver had not been intoxicated, merely had a glass of wine or two with dinner. Nothing could ever fill the void that her mother’s death had left her with. Ciara missed her so much. Antoine had only been a toddler when she died, never having enough time to know and love his grandmother.
She looked over at her father again. He was reading a magazine found on a table beside the chairs. He had been affected the most. He had always been the life of the party, the comedian, but after her death, a part of him had shut down. He livened up with Antoine from time to time, but the luster surrounding him had faded. Then two years ago, he had been diagnosed with cancer and initially, he had fought hard, but now he seemed content to just exist. She was always the one pushing him to try harder, to want more. She had forced him to go to the clinic, but she needed him, needed his wisdom as she raised her son. She had lost her mother and she refused to give up on him, despite what the doctors said.