“They likely won’t even be in the house. They usually go out Friday nights after dinner. My younger brother and sister do too and I’m sure they’ll invite us along but I would rather stay in and have hot, sweaty monkey sex with you.”
“You’re sure that they want me to come too? Maybe they just want to spend time with you before the fundraiser thing.”
“I think that they especially want you to come. Have I mentioned that they think twenty-seven is a good age to start thinking about settling down? Like I said, if this is too much pressure after two dates, then I completely understand. They’re just extremely excited that I’m having a relationship of more than a couple of hours in duration. It’s been a while.”
“I’m okay with it, I guess, if you are. I’m sometimes a bit awkward around people I don’t know well yet, but I clean up pretty well and I could probably make myself presentable.”
“My brother Drew is much more socially awkward than you are.”
“Thanks.” I laughed. “He and I will probably get along well.”
“I’m sure he’ll want to get along well with you. He’s a twenty-three-year-old player.”
“You must be his hero.”
“I will be after he meets you. I’ll tell my mom it’s okay then, and that you can just stay with me. I’m sorry that this isn’t exactly the sexiest location for us to finally get to sleep together.”
“Braden, we made each other come in an interview room at the courthouse today.”
“That’s a good point.” He laughed. “That was also pretty impressive teamwork if I must say so myself. Are you in bed?”
“Yeah, I’m watching Antiques Roadshow.”
“Me too. So now we can say that we've watched TV in bed together.”
“When Mark and Adam ask?” There was silence on the other end. “Hello? Are you still there?”
“Yeah, I was just thinking about you being in bed with me. Today was just a stop gap. I need tomorrow night to get here quickly. Under other circumstances it might actually make me a little uncomfortable to get to know you biblically for the first time in my parents’ house, but I’m desperate. I'm starting to get really distracted and not always at convenient times. So should we finish the pre-sex talk so that we don’t have to worry about it later?”
“Sure,” I answered.
“Do you have a favorite position?”
“Whichever one I’m in at the moment. How about you?”
“All of them. How many sexual partners have you had?”
“Six, which includes the first one, even though that was a onetime encounter.”
“Your first time was a one night stand?”
“He wasn’t just some guy I met at a frat party. He was a friend. I thought he was more than that but he was too happy being a player.”
“How old were you?”
“Eighteen. I was a freshman at Yale and he was a sophomore. It’s weird, you remind me a little bit of him. You’re not going to sleep with me and then decide that we should just be friends, are you?”
“No. I always make it very clear upfront if I’m only interested in a one-night encounter and I don’t tend to wind up being friends with the women I have them with.”
“How old were you?”
“Sixteen, but my girlfriend was eighteen.”
“You gave it up for a cougar,” I teased.
“Why do I remind you of him?” he said, going back to the other topic. He seemed very interested in this.
“I don’t know. He was tall and exceptionally good-looking like you. He sounded very well educated and upper class. He was very popular and he hooked up a lot. He was planning to go to law school. You’re different in a lot of ways though too. You’re much funnier and you and I have many more interests in common. He was very much a nineteen-year-old. You just hang out with guys who act like they’re nineteen.”
“He should have made things clear before he slept with you.”
“I should have, too. In his defense, I don’t think he knew that I was a virgin and I don’t think he planned it. It just kind of happened. Besides, was it really surprising that a popular nineteen-year-old didn’t want to get too tied down? I should have brought it up beforehand like I did with you.”
“Yeah, by the time you got to me you were a crack negotiator. Good thing that Jessica was right and I wanted to agree with everything you asked for.”
“Well, I wanted to agree to hook up with you. So you’ll be lucky number seven.”
“I promise that you’ll get lucky. I’m going to let you go now so that you can rest up. I’m going to have some adrenaline and some testosterone flowing tomorrow.”