I raised my eyebrows. “You do? I thought you were afraid of snakes and frigid water.”
She pushed herself up. “No, not tonight. I want to do everything. I want to swim with you, and I want you to take me hard in the water. And then I want to come back here and lick all the water off your body and take our time to make love, take it so slow we think we’re going to die from waiting.”
I studied her eyes, bright with unshed tears, desperate to forget that tomorrow would come. Touching her lips, I smiled.
“Then that’s what we’ll do.”
WE DRESSED IN THE early morning, both of us sated and sleepy. My stomach clenched as I watched Meghan lean over to pick up her shirt, her boobs swinging. I didn’t know how she could make me hard again after the night we’d just shared, but she did.
As if by silent agreement, we hadn’t talked about anything serious for the rest of the evening. Meghan cried again the last time I sank between her legs, and I’d kissed away her tears, but I didn’t ask her why she wept and she didn’t bring it up.
The truck rocked us up and down over the potholed road, and I reached to hold her hand. Her fingers squeezed mine, painfully, as she stared out the window.
I pulled into my normal spot alongside the barn. A stream of sunlight broke through the dim glow of dawn, and for a moment I watched the beam dance on the sparse grass of the path that led to the fields.
Neither of us moved. This was the last minute, and once I opened my door and went around to help her out of the truck, the spell would be broken. Summer—at least, my summer with Meghan—would be officially over.
I wasn’t ready. I knew it with certainty, but knowing it didn’t change the facts. And the facts said that Meghan still had another year of college, and by her own admission, she wasn’t looking for anything long-term or permanent. She was recovering from her dad’s death, and she was struggling to figure out who she was. I had a hunch that the series of short-term hookups and boyfriends were over; there was still pain in her heart over what had happened with Owen, and that wasn’t going to go away any time soon.
I didn’t know what I was going to say until the words spilled out of my mouth. “I was wrong in what I said to you at Boomer’s that day, and what I said the night we had sex the first time. The night alongside the road, that is.” I shot her a grin and gripped her hand tighter. “When we met, I only saw your immaturity. It was what I wanted to see, because setting you up like that let me keep you at a distance.” I stared out the windshield. “But what I didn’t see then, and what wouldn’t let me keep you at arms’ length, was your heart.”
She drew a long, shuddering breath, but she didn’t respond.
“Meghan, your heart is beautiful. It’s kind and loving and compassionate. I’ve seen you with Bridget, and with the rest of the kids in your class, and I’ve seen you with people in town. You ... you draw them in. And that’s because of the person you are.”
She shook her head, full out sobbing now.
“You’re going to have any future you want. It’s all bright and shiny, you know? The world is open to you. I hope you take it and run. I hope you shock the hell out of anyone stupid enough to underestimate you. And I hope that sometimes, you think back on this summer, and me, and you smile. I hope you remember me ... well. Not the raving lunatic, but maybe the guy who took you fishing.”
I couldn’t say anything else. I reached for the handle that opened my door, but before I could move out of the cab, Meghan grabbed my arm. “Sam. I don’t want to leave. I don’t want this summer to be over. I don’t want us to be over. It hurts, and I can’t stand it.”
I pulled her close to me, my arms tight around her shoulders. “Shhh, babe. I know. But it’ll get better. Leaving is hard, but you know you don’t belong here. This little town can’t hold the future you have. You’ll go down to Florida and be with your family, and by the time you’re back in Savannah for school, it won’t hurt anymore. You have so much to look forward to.” I forced myself to try to make the words believable. “And so do I. A lot of work, yeah, but I’m going to have time for fun now, too. You’ve reminded me of that. So thank you.”
I kissed the top of her head and opened my door. “Come on. You need to get a little sleep before you leave. I don’t want you nodding off on the road.”
I closed my door and struggled to get myself under control as I walked around the truck. When I reached the passenger’s side, Meghan gave me her hand and let me help her out.