"I'm good. I tired," was all Elroy had said. "Why don't I sneak into your room tonight and we'll fool around while everyone else is sleeping?"
Kyle laughed this time. "I don't think so." But he did kiss him goodnight on the lips, and said, "If you need, anything let me know. I know you're not going to sleep tonight."
"How do you know that?" Kyle shrugged. "I pay attention. I know you slept well for the last two nights. I heard your breathing. That means you won't sleep well tonight."
This surprised Elroy. "You know my sleeping patterns?" A warm, pleasant feeling filled his body. He wanted to grab him, hug him, and carry him into the bedroom. No one else on Earth cared about the way he slept.
"I can't help it," Kyle said. "I'm only a few feet away from you."
"You do care about me more than you let on," Elroy said. He couldn't stop smiling now.
"Don't flatter yourself," Kyle said. He couldn't look at him.
This time Elroy glanced back and forth, then grabbed Kyle's shoulders and kissed him goodnight on the lips. "Thanks. No one has ever cared about whether I sleep or not."
"I know it's not easy for you," Kyle said. "I feel bad sometimes." Then he patted him on the shoulder and went into his bedroom.
At three o'clock in the morning Elroy felt the sofa bed move. When he opened his eyes and looked up, he saw Jeremy sitting at the foot of the bed. "What the fuck are you doing in here now? Your wife is practically in the next room."
"We have to talk," Jeremy said. His eyes were heavy and his breath smelled of beer.
"Just go back to bed, Ricky, and let's get through this holiday," Elroy said.
"Don't start that Ricky shit with me," Jeremy said. "You told me your name was Mike. What am I supposed to think now?"
Elroy sat up and moved farther away from him. "You're not supposed to think, Ricky. You're only supposed to fuck on command like a good stud. I'm sorry, Jeremy. There's nothing to think about. So go back to bed with your wife and leave me alone." He knew sleeping with married men could be dangerous. He never thought he'd wind up in this position. He'd always hoped his life story would wind up interesting. But he didn't want it to be this interesting.
"I'm talking about us," Jeremy said. "You know I can't get enough of you." He had a helpless expression; he seemed to be pleading. He looked rumpled and scruffy in his boxer shorts and white T-shirt.
Elroy closed his eyes. "What about us?" He wanted to tell him he'd been planning to end their affair before New Year's but decided not to get into that now. It wasn't the time or the place.
"I thought we had something special," Jeremy said. He moved closer and reached for Elroy's leg. "Can I come into bed for a minute? I'd like to hold you for just a minute."
"The only thing we have is sex," Elroy said. "That's not something special. We both know that."
"Can I get into bed with you for a minute?" His full erection was now sticking out of his boxer shorts. He made no attempt to cover it.
Elroy did not reply as fast as he should have. While he hesitated, staring at Jeremy's erection, Jeremy's hand slid under the covers and rested on the inside of his thigh. The next thing Elroy knew he was on his back with his sweatpants off and his legs wrapped around Jeremy's waist. By that time it was too late to answer. Jeremy had already put on the condom and pinned him to the bed.
* * * * They did it again the next day in the back of Jeremy's pick-up truck. While the rest of Kyle and his family watched the kids open Christmas gifts from Santa, Jeremy and Elroy went into town. Jeremy made up an excuse about going into town. He said he thought he'd left the lights on at the house where they'd been renovating the kitchen and he wanted to go back and check to see if he had. Oscar told him not to worry about it. But Jeremy refused to relax until he knew for sure, and he asked Elroy if he wanted to take a ride with him.
If Kyle thought there was anything unusual about this he didn't show it openly. He seemed more relaxed than Elroy had ever seen him since before Lev Godwin's death. Aside from Babe's snide gay comments, the rest of Kyle's family seemed to be accepting the fact that he was gay.
Babe didn't care about them going into town. She was too busy with the kids. Oscar wanted to take a nap and Patty had been in the kitchen since dawn roasting a turkey. So Jeremy and Elroy left the house and drove down another back road that looked even more isolated than where Kyle's family lived. Jeremy parked in a small turnaround between clusters of tall pine trees. Jeremy didn't even remove his clothes this time. While Elroy took off all his clothes, Jeremy just pulled down his zipper and put on a condom. When it was over, Elroy told himself this would be the last time they'd do this.