As we drew close to Society Hill, where the doctor resided, the city turned lovely with its trees and steeples, its brick row houses and mansions. What struck me was how empty the streets were of slaves. The sudden realization caused a tightness inside of me to release, one I was not aware existed until that moment.
I found us lodging in a Quaker boardinghouse near Fourth Street, where Father relinquished himself to me—what he ate, what he wore, all decisions about his care. He even turned over the money pouches and ledgers. Every few days, I navigated us to the doctor’s house by hired carriage, but after three weeks of seemingly futile visits, Father still couldn’t walk more than a stone’s throw without exhaustion and pain. He’d lost more weight. He looked absolutely desiccated.
Seated in the doctor’s parlor one morning, I stared at Dr. Physick’s white hair and aquiline nose, a nose very like Father’s. He said, “Sadly, I can find no cause for Judge Grimké’s tremors or his deterioration.”
Father was not the only one who was frustrated. I, too, was weary of coming here optimistic and leaving dismayed. “. . . Surely, there must be something you can prescribe.”
“Yes, of course. I believe the sea air will do him good.”
“Sea air?”
He smiled. “You’re skeptical, but it’s quite recognized—it’s known as thalassotherapy. I’ve known it to bring even the gravely ill back to health.”
I could only imagine what Father would say to this. Sea air.
“My prescription,” he said, “is that you take him to Long Branch for the summer. It’s a small, rather isolated place on the New Jersey shore known for its sea cure. I’ll send you with laudanum and paregoric. He should be outside as much as possible. Encourage him to wade in the ocean, if he’s able. By fall, perhaps he’ll be recovered enough to travel home.”
Perhaps I would be home with Nina before September.
The doctor had said Long Branch was small, but he’d exaggerated. It was not small, it was not even miniscule; it was barely existent. There were four farmhouses, one tiny clapboard Methodist church, and a dry goods store. Neither was the place “rather isolated”; it was woefully isolated. We traveled by private coach from Philadelphia for six days, the last one bumping over a foot trail. After stopping for toiletry supplies in the dry goods, we continued a ways further to Fish Tavern, the only hotel. It was perched atop a bluff overlooking the ocean—a large, sea-weathered edifice. When the clerk informed us that prayer meetings were held in the communal dining hall after dinner, I took it as a sign God had guided us.
Father had come willingly, too willingly, it seemed. I’d felt sure he would insist on returning to South Carolina. I’d expected him to quip, “Do we not have sea-air in Charleston?” but when I’d broken the news to him there in Dr. Physick’s examination room, careful to use the word thalassotherapy, he’d only looked at me for a long, strange moment. A shadow passed over his face, what I took to be disappointment. He said, “Let’s go to New Jersey then. That’s what we’ll do.”
That first afternoon before dusk, I brought cod soup to Father’s room. When he tried to eat it, his hand quivered so violently, spoonfuls splattered onto the bed sheets. He lay back against the bedstead and let me feed him. I chattered about the squalling ocean, about the serpentine steps that led from the hotel down to the shore, almost frantic to divert us from what was happening. His mouth opening and closing like a baby bird’s. Ladling in the colorless broth. The helplessness of it.
While I fed him, the crush of waves filled the room. Through the window, I could see a swatch of water the color of pewter, whipped by the wind into frothing swells. Finally, he put up his hand to let me know he’d had enough of soup and babbling both.
I placed the chamber pot on the floor nearby. “Good night, Father.”