Chess blinks at me as if I've spoken in a foreign language. But I know her too well now, which means I know when she's stalling. I cross my arms over my chest and wait her out.
Slowly she sets her eyeliner down. "Sometimes I hate how perceptive you are."
"It's my job to read people."
Chess turns around and leans against the counter. "You're the first man I've ever lived with."
"You're my first too." I give her a brief smile. "I like that about us, truth be told."
"Caveman," she says with a laughing huff.
"So we've established."
Chess bites her lip with a bemused expression. "Don't you ever experience any moments of doubt?"
Maybe I should be insulted by that, but I'm not. We're more alike than she realizes.
"Of course. It scared the hell out of me when I realized that what I was feeling for you went beyond simple attraction or friendship. But Dex once reminded me that we have zero hesitation on the football field, and to hesitate in life is stupid."
///
"Stupid?" She raises one delicate black brow.
"Well, … " I grin. "More like a waste of energy better spent on other things."
Chess pushes off the counter and walks toward me. Heat coils low in my gut, my abs pulling tight in response. She wraps her arms around my neck and lifts up on her toes. Her kiss is sweet affection and lingering appreciation.
My hands slide to her peachy butt and give it a squeeze. Chess makes a small noise in her throat and leans into me, her tongue licking my lower lip like it's candy.
A surge of lust goes through me, hot and thick, but I can't help smiling against her luscious lips. "You wouldn't be trying to distract me now would you, Chester?"
She gives me a little nip that goes straight to my cock, then pulls back enough to meet my eyes. "I don't think you realize how irresistible you are, Finnegan."
Her fingers trace lazy circles on my neck, and my lids lower as I dip down for another taste. She hums in pleasure. And we get a lost in soft, unhurried kisses before she speaks again. "Let's say distraction is an added side bonus."
I chuckled, then give her ass a light slap.
Chess yelps and glares. "One day, I'm going to spank your ass, Mannus, and we'll see who's laughing then."
"Kinky, I like it."
Chess cups my cheek. "Want to help me move my stuff?"
Smiling wide, I give her a swift kiss. "Okay, but let's give this guest bed a nice send off first."
She yelps as I wrap my arms under her butt and lift her high. We make it to the bed but just barely.
* * *
"I think we should change the mattress before your parents visit again," Chess says as she hangs up a black dress. "Doesn't feel right, imagining them sleeping on it after what we just did in there."
I snicker and put down a hamper filled with her clothes. "I don't know, I kind of want to put up a commemorative plaque. ‘On this site, Finnegan Mannus gave Chester Copper five orgasms and reduced her to tears of pleasure.'"
"I believe you were the one tearing up."
"It was an emotional moment."
She takes the basket from me. "Which drawers can I take?"
The closet is a large square with shelving on two walls, hanging racks on the other two, and a massive waist high dresser in the center.
"I've filled up the left side of the closet. Why don't you take the right? Let me just clear out some old stuff from this drawer."
"Sounds good."
From a top drawer, I start taking out a mess of old ticket stubs and college game day programs-nostalgic shit I can't seem to get rid of-and set them on the top of the dresser. "I'm thinking we should probably put a mirror in here. You know the kind that women use to put on earrings and shit? My mom has one in her closet-"
Chess make a soft sound, and I glance back. But she isn't even looking at me. Her eyes are on the dresser top, her skin pale and her expression haunted.
It takes me a second to figure out what she's looking at but when I do, my heart gives a painful lurch. Scattered among the papers, is a sonogram with the word "Peanut" scrawled across the top in vivid red pen.
The air in the room goes thin. I can hear my heart pounding, feel it trying to break free. But I can't move.
Chess's hand slips into mine. "Finn."
My fingers convulse, gripping hers tight.
With her free hand, Chess reaches out, her fingers just dancing at the edges of the picture. "Can I?" she whispers to me.
Dully, I nod.
She handles the flimsy piece of paper as if it was precious glass, bringing it closer to look at the image. A shiver goes through me. I don't want to touch it. But I can't look away.
"I forgot I put it there," I whisper-to Chess or to my baby's image, I don't know. I'd tossed it so carelessly into a draw to sit in the dark. With a shaking hand, I take the picture from Chess.
It's an old-fashioned sonogram that only shows an outline, not the more modern, high-tech version that renders a perfect image. "Britt was superstitious about seeing the baby's face before she was born," I tell Chess with a voice that sounds like chunky gravel. "Said some things should be a surprise."
"Honey … " Chess rests her cheek against my arm.
"I don't even know if I regret that decision or not."
Chess wraps an arm around my waist and hugs against my side. I turn into her warmth, and take a deep breath. "I'm okay," I tell her. "I am. I just get sad sometimes."
///
"I know," she says, stroking my stomach.
My thumb touches the little image.
Chess speaks again in a low, hesitant tone. "I could frame it for you, if you'd like."
For a long moment, I stare down at my baby girl. "No." I clear my throat. "I don't think I can manage that … But she needs a safer spot to rest."
"Of course."
I take another deep breath and gently place the sonogram on top of the dresser, away from all the mess, before turning back to Chess and wrapping her in my arms. She hugs me tight.
"I feel bad for Britt," I mumble into Chess's hair. "But I'm sorry if it got too intense when she showed up."
Chess looks up at me. "Don't ever be sorry about something like that." Her green gaze searches my face. "It's okay, you know, to be friends with her. Maybe you can give each other something no one else can."
"God, please don't say that."
"Say what?"
"That I have something no one else can give her. I hate the idea of Britt hurting, but I don't think I'm the one to help her. She seems to think … "
I hesitate, and Chess frowns. "What?"
"Before you walked in, Britt started saying that she thought we were meant to be together." I run a hand over my face. "She's kind of messed up, Chess. She was talking about having another baby with me. I think she wants to … recreate … "
I can't finish.
"Shit," Chess whispers.
"She needs help, Chess. But I can't give it to her. I tried to tell her that there will be other chances. She'll find someone and have kids one day. We both will."
If I wasn't looking right at Chess, I would have missed her flinch. She's good at hiding it, giving my hand a squeeze. "You will."
Chess lets my hand go and opens a drawer to fill it with socks.
I stand there in heavy silence. "Something I said upset you."
She glances my way. "Of course I'm upset. Your pain is mine."
I believe that. I feel that. It's a comfort I never expected but appreciate. Even so. "That's not it, though. Something hurt you personally. What is it?"
The line of her slim shoulders tense. She opens the next drawer. "I'm fine, Finn. Really."
I take her hand and halt her movements. "Chess, come on. Something has been bothering you since Britt showed up here. You think I can't see it?"
A glimmer of panic lights her eyes before she glances away. "Now isn't the time to talk about this."
Breaking free of me, she heads out of the closet.
I follow her. "There's never a right time to talk about painful shit. But I'm here." Catching up to her, I clasp her elbow and she halts. I move closer, until my chest is pressed against her back. "Talk to me. Please."
I'm tall enough to see her eyes flutter closed, and the pain that etches her face. "I can't have them. Children. Babies."
It's the last thing I expected her to say. "What?"
Her breath shudders. "I'm basically infertile."
Shit. Every comment I've made about having kids swims through my head. It had to have been a slap in the face for Chess. But she let me ramble and cry on her shoulder. "Honey … " I reach out for her.