“You had asked me last night why not now? I told you I couldn’t say. I wondered why myself. Why not be done with it, as you had said. I foolishly believed that perhaps—” She hesitated. “—I might find pleasure with you, if only for a short time. To taste seduction and what followed.” She laughed sadly. “I even enjoyed our combative challenge of surrender.” She shook her head as though she thought better of saying any more. “I will not force you to bed me.”
She walked out of the cottage, and Cullen almost went after her. Instead, he took the bucket and doused the flames. It was better this way, he thought. He would have merely used her to satisfy his manly needs. But then she would have at least gotten to taste intimacy. Wouldn’t that have satisfied both their needs?
He tossed the bucket across the room. She hadn’t been the only one who had enjoyed their little bouts of combat. She had managed to spark life back into him with a strange challenge, and he’d enjoyed outmaneuvering her attempts to have it her way.
She hadn’t only managed to be a thorn in his side, but a constant in his mind, usurping thoughts of Alaina. The realization shocked him, and he stumbled out of the cottage determined to keep his mind focused on…
Damned if Sara didn’t pop into his head before Alaina.
Sara, however, who sat her horse, waiting, was presently giving him the most grief. Or was it the most challenge?
“Finally ready?” she daringly accused.
“Oh, I’m ready,” Cullen said, mounting his horse with powerful dexterity.
“Good, then let’s be done with this.” Sara directed her horse in a steady gait away from the cottage and to the road.
Cullen followed. He couldn’t have agreed more. This needed finishing for them both, but certainly not to her way of thinking. He had entered into a bargain with her and would not see that bargain absolved due to foolishness.
If she gave him what he needed, then he would make certain that she got what she needed. It was only fair.
Besides, he was feeling an idiot for having hurt her the way he had. He’d struck out at her when angry with himself—not that her candid nature had helped, but then she had only been honest with him.
Cullen rubbed at his chin. Damn, if she didn’t confuse him.
It had all been simple to start with. How had it grown so complicated? Wed, bed, get his son. Why hadn’t he simply stuck to that? Why had he allowed her to challenge him? Why had he allowed her circumstances to affect him?
Why had he opened his heart to her?
Then realization struck him.
He had been numb since Alaina died and certain he would never feel again. And this brash, wild redhead had managed to stir his feelings.
“You needn’t bother to buy me that sweet cake,” she said from her stiff perch on her mare.
Cullen couldn’t resist a grin. She was a prideful woman, and a determined one, no withering flower on the vine, and he couldn’t help but admire that.
“I want to,” he said firmly.
“Why?”
Her sharp, curt query startled him, but his reply was simple. “Because I want to!”
“And if I refuse?” she said, not turning to look at him.
He laughed. “You won’t be able to. The sweet cakes are too irresistible, just like me.”
Chapter 13
They broke camp early the next morning after an uneventful and quiet night. Sara saw no point in speaking with Cullen. There wasn’t anything left to be said. He’d made himself clear.
And it had stung!
She hadn’t wanted to admit it stung, but it had. She should have expected it, she told herself. What did she think, that this was some fairy tale union where love would conquer all?
She sneered at the foolish thought.
She had mistakenly thought to enjoy the intimacy the sealing of their vows would bring, and why? Idiotically, she had found him appealing. Even his undying love for Alaina had touched her heart. She’d thought that for a moment she would be able to sample lovemaking, but that was never a possibility, only a silly dream.
She was much better off sticking to the practical, making plans for a future alone and filling it with worthy achievements.
“We’ll need to be cautious at market,” Cullen said from behind her.
Sara didn’t turn around. She kept a steady gait along the well-worn path. “I know.”
“We’ll need to appear the loving couple.”
“I can be sly when needed.”
“Aha! You are like your father.”
Sara heard the teasing in his tone and chose to ignore it. “Like my father, I use my skills against an enemy.”
He made no reply, for which Sara was relieved. She was in no mood to banter with the Scotsman. She simply wanted to return home and finally resume her life. Cullen could go wherever he chose once he made a good show of short-lived marital bliss. She expected nor wanted any more from him.