Sara sat up, bracing her hands on either side of her. “No, I’m not, and it would do you well to remember that.”
“Her tongue was gentle!” Cullen snapped.
“What you want to say is that my tongue is sharp and unpredictable,” Sara accused. “And you don’t find me appealing.”
“We don’t have to appeal to each other to solidify this bargain.”
“True enough, but you will need to let go of your grief long enough to seal our bargain.”
Cullen stood silent, staring at her, knowing she was right yet wondering if he would ever be able to step out of his grief, out of the memories, out of the pain of losing Alaina.
Sara sat on the bed. “Tell me what happened to Alaina. I often wondered of her fate.”
Cullen obliged her, though he didn’t know why. Maybe it was his need to speak of his pain and finally release it. He sat alongside her, again silently questioning why. He only knew if he didn’t share some of his pain, his heart would certainly burst from his suffering.
“Alaina helped to rescue me from Weighton.”
Sara’s eyes rolled in shock. “I heard Weighton was an impregnable prison that no one escaped.”
“Thanks to my brother Burke and the infamous outlaw Storm—”
Sara grew excited. “Storm! I’ve heard tales of her bravery and how she rescues the innocent.”
“Storm is a pint-sized bundle of courage and skill, and my brother fell helplessly in love with her, as she did him. He is taking her to his home in America where she will be safe. Alaina worked with them, providing them with important information that helped lead to my escape.”
A sadness marred Sara’s nod. “Alaina was a brave woman.”
“Braver than I ever imagined, though her courage cost us dearly.” Cullen paused, recalling Alaina’s smiling face, her violet eyes, her gentle ways and her last breath. “We were all on the last portion of our journey to freedom when we were attacked by soldiers, the Earl of Balford’s men. I lost sight of Alaina during the clash, and when it was over, the stench of blood and death heavy in the air, I spotted her.”
He drew a much-needed breath before continuing, but it did little good. The stench of that battle still stung his nostrils, and he knew it always would. “She had been run through with a sword. I rushed to her side—” He choked on his words and fought the tears that tore at his eyes. “I knew—” He shook his head roughly. “I knew at first glance she was dying. I held her in my arms and she fought with every painful breath to tell me of her love for me and of our son. I promised her that I would find him.”
Cullen hadn’t realized that she had laid her hand over his or that he’d taken hold of it and gripped it tightly. He did know he needed an anchor right now. Something to keep him sane and steady, and Sara, with her stout courage, could do that.
Sara gave his hand a squeeze. “She left a part of her here with you in her son.”
Cullen took their clasped hands to rest at his heart. “She left part of herself here as well. I can never forget her.”
“There’s no reason you should. In time you will heal and the pain will ease.”
He let their locked hands rest in his lap. “You sound as if you speak from experience.”
Sara shook her head. “I have not been lucky enough to find love, but I have observed others around me who have loved and lost. It is not easy, but then life is not easy. We do what we must whether we like it or not.”
“Like us marrying?”
“It serves a purpose for each of us, a good purpose. So why complain?”
“You have a practical nature,” Cullen said.
“What else am I to do? I have learned through trial and error that there is a time to fight and a time to surrender.”
Cullen smiled. “Then you will know when to surrender.”
Sara laughed softly and slipped her hand out of his. “Hear what I said, not what you want to hear.”
A gust of wind shook the cottage reminding them both of the storm. Cullen left the bed to go to the door, open it and check on the weather.
He returned after latching the door. “The wind remains but it looks as if the snow is letting up. It may just stop before morning, which means we can be on our way.”
“That is good news. I look forward to seeing my family again. It’s been too long.”
“You aren’t angry with your father anymore?”
“I have no reason to be.” She poked his chest. “I have a husband, so I have fulfilled my duty. He will bother me no more.”
“What happens when I leave you?”
Sara shrugged. “I’m not concerned with that since in the eyes of the church I am still wed. My father might bluster in anger, but eventually he’ll calm down and leave it be, leave me be.”