"Yes." It felt good to finally admit my fear out loud.
Jade shrugged. "But that could happen with anyone-whether it's a famous person or just a frat guy."
"Thanks." Sometimes I just needed encouragement. Aaron had really done a number on my confidence, and I was only beginning to see how deep the damage went.
"Just enjoy the rest of the show." Jade linked her arm through mine. "Chase is rocking it tonight."
She was right. He was doing incredible, and despite the crowd, his eyes still kept falling on me. This was one of those times where my mom would tell me to muster my confidence. I'd sabotage a good thing if I couldn't hold it together.
Chapter Twenty
Chase was right that we weren't camping with everyone else-or rather that we weren't camping with the general festival goers. We were, however, camping near the rest of his band as well as Kyle and Jade. They'd packed some extra stuff in case they decided to stay the night, and they ended up needing it.
We piled into Zach's van which has been the go-to vehicle for Chance of a Lifetime for a few years. It sounded like it was going to be exchanged for a tour bus next time around. I wondered how they felt about such a big change.
Zach parked in a dirt lot, and we all pulled out our stuff.
"Can I get that for you?" Chase offered to take my backpack even though he was already wearing a pack and had our tent and everything.
"No, I'm fine." I appreciated him asking to be nice, so I didn't give him a hard time about insinuating that I couldn't handle wearing a backpack.
When everyone else stopped to set up their stuff, Chase gestured for me to continue. "Let's get a little bit of privacy."
I glanced at Jade and Kyle illuminated by moonlight and flashlights. They seemed perfectly happy with the evening's accommodations. I really had to give it to Jade. She was proving to be way more resilient than I would have thought. I guess that's the thing about people. We always assume their true personality is the one they show you, but sometimes all it takes is moving them to a new situation and a whole new side comes out.
A little further into the clearing Chase stopped. "How's this?"
"It's great." I took off my pack and got to work helping Chase with the tent.
Fifteen minutes later, we had everything inside the tent. I ducked and followed Chase inside.
He zipped our two sleeping bags together into one bigger one. I giggled. I couldn't help it.
"What?" He turned to look at me.
"Nothing. This seems funny somehow."
"Funny?"
"Yeah. Like we're teenagers or something."
He moved toward me. "Well, technically you are still in your teens."
"For another month, and you're definitely not."
"Nope. I'm robbing the cradle. I need to enjoy the last few weeks of being able to say I'm sleeping with a nineteen-year-old."
"This might be your last chance. I mean, I doubt you'll be back before my birthday." I gave him a coy smile.
"In that case." He was on me in a blink of an eye, tackling me down on top of the connected sleeping bags. "I need to enjoy the experience." He turned off his flashlight, sending us into darkness.
He slowly pulled my t-shirt over my head, and I shivered in anticipation. I'd missed having his hands all over me. He moved to my bra next, tossing it before letting his hands and mouth settle on my breasts.
So distracted by his attention, I didn't notice him unbutton my jeans until he was already sliding them off.
"Aren't you going to get undressed too?" I asked in the darkness.
"Isn't that your job?"
I reached up, searching for him in the dark. I pulled his t-shirt off, and then moved on to his pants. He was kneeling, so he moved to pull off his own pants. He stilled my hand when I went for my panties. He wanted me to save those for himself.
He slid off my underwear slowly, like he was savoring the moment. "Would it blind you completely if I turned on a light right now?"
"Why would you need to do that?"
"Because I need to see you. Touching you is amazing-but I want the visual. Just a glimpse."
"But won't that mean people could see through the tent?"
"Who's here? We're so far from everyone else."
"For a few seconds."
He didn't reply. Instead, he turned on his flashlight and fixed the beam on my body, carefully avoiding my eyes.
In a strange, probably kinky way, it was hot having him watch me, illuminating me in that light. I watched his expression, watched the way his breathing changed.
"I will never get tired of staring at you. You're so beautiful, it's unreal. I still wonder how I got so lucky."
"Funny, I was just thinking about how you have so many options."
"Options?" He switched off the light, sending us into darkness again.
"Of girls."
"I only want one, so that doesn't mean anything."
"I hope you'll be able to say that in a few months."
"Why? Are you nervous that I'm going to change?" He lay down next to me, gently running his hand down my arm.
"Yes." It was so easy to be honest in the pitch blackness.
"Things might change for my music, but that doesn't mean it changes anything for us. I'm crazy about you, Cara. And if we're all about honesty tonight, I might as well lay it all out there."
"Lay what out there?" I shivered again, but this time it was with nervousness.
He pulled me into his arms. "I've fallen in love with you."
His words hit me hard, and I felt them deep in my chest. My reply came from my subconscious, but I'd already known they were there waiting to come out. "I feel the same way about you."
"Oh, thank god." His lips were on mine in a second. I returned the kiss, tangling my hands in his hair as his hands slipped down my body.
The whispered words in the dark had ignited something in both of us. His lips moved to my neck as his hand slipped between my legs. I stroked him, loving the way he came to life underneath my hand.
We didn't spend much time on foreplay. He moved over me. "I love you, Cara." He thrust inside me with an intensity I wasn't expecting. The sleeping bags and mats below us were no match for the way he rocked me into the ground. I'd be sore the next day, but I didn't care. All I cared about was having Chase on top of me and inside me.
"I love you, Chase." My reply came late, when we were already moving together perfectly in synch and his mouth had returned to my breast again.
He groaned, my words seeming to turn him on more. His movements became deeper and faster as he filled me with the length of him over and over until he pushed me over the edge. Then he shuddered, and we both lay there panting and sweaty. The only sound remaining came from the cicadas.
He kissed me lightly. "I'm home."
I grinned. I knew exactly the way he felt.
That's when I heard the sound of twigs breaking.
"Chase, what was that?" I sat up, grabbing the first piece of clothing I could find in an attempt to cover myself up.
"Stay here." He fumbled around in the dark for his underwear and slipped into them before walking out. He grabbed the flashlight.
I pulled Chase's t-shirt over my head without worrying about a bra.
"Hey, you! What the fuck are you doing?" Chase's voiced carried through the nearly silent night.
I heard more twigs breaking. Chase's voice carried from slightly further away. "Give me that. Were you recording us?"
"No. Not exactly," a young male voice responded.
"Not exactly?" Chase asked incredulously. "Then what were you doing?"
"Just seeing if you were going to play something exclusive or something."
"You think I came out here in the middle of nowhere with my girlfriend to play exclusive music?"
I saw the illumination of a screen. "You recorded all of that? You fucking videotaped me with my girlfriend?"
"I couldn't see anything. It was just sound." The young voice quaked.
"And that makes it okay?"
Chase was screaming by this point. He was loud enough to bring everyone else out of their tents. I searched around until I found my jeans and shoes and left the tent.
I walked around the circle of people. Chase was still out there in his underwear. Poor guy.
Len turned his phone flashlight toward me. "Hey, Cara. I think you're wearing the wrong shirt."
I ignored him and turned to the guy I'd never met. The one who had evidently taped us. "You're an asshole."
Everyone laughed.
"No laughing. I'm being serious. Taping something like that is so far from cool it isn't funny." I grabbed the phone from Chase and stared down the kid who couldn't have been more than sixteen or so. "You are not getting this back. You look younger than me. Hopefully, your mommy and daddy will buy you a new one. I'm sure they'd love to know what you were doing with yours to lose it in the first place."
"You can't take my phone." He glared at me.