The Girl Who Fell(30)

He takes a small step back, rakes his fingers through his hair. “Yeah, of course.”

I text Lizzie and she calls two seconds later. “What’s up?”

“I’ve decided to stay in. Alec’s here.”

“You’re blowing me off for Hockey Boy?”

“I’m not blowing you off, Lizzie. I just . . .”

“Don’t be that girl, Zee. You need to be out with the team. You’re the captain.”

As if I didn’t know. As if the stress hasn’t been enough all season. “Cocaptain, and I wanted to celebrate, Lizzie, I did. But . . .”

“Something happened. What happened?”

I turn away from Alec, fidget with the dish towel folded under Mom’s pruning shears. “My father was at the game.”

“Holy shit, Zee. You doing okay? Do you want to talk? I can be over in, like, fifteen minutes.”

“Thanks, but it’s cool. Alec is here.”

I hear the weight of her sigh. “Yeah, okay. I’ll tell Karen you weren’t feeling well.”

I tack on another “thanks” before hanging up.

Alec gathers me to his chest and I feel safe. “I’m sorry your father hijacked your win. That’s really lame.”

I pull back. “He didn’t.” I’m surprised by how quickly I leap to Dad’s defense. “It just left me feeling kind of lost I guess. Like I don’t know what to do.”

“Do you have to do anything?”

I search his eyes.

Alec caresses my jaw. “Right now, right here, you don’t have to do anything or decide anything. You can just be. With me, of course. That’s my caveat. That you just be with me.”

“Bossy,” I tease. But it’s perfect. I want to just be with Alec. Free of any doubt or drama.

I toss my Adidas bag onto the laundry machine and tuck my stick into the forgotten corner of the laundry room. I take Alec’s hand to lead him to my room.

I watch him stretch out onto my bed, prop his head against my pillows. He kicks off his sneakers and they thud onto the floor, one before the other. He crosses his legs and even his socks are cute. Finn sniffs around his Alec’s toes, his ears flat back in a way I’ve never seen.

“I don’t think your dog likes me.” Alec holds out his hand for Finn to sniff. Finn backs away.

“It just takes him a beat to warm up to new people. I’m not sure he had the nicest owner before we got him.” I kneel next to Finn, which feels easier than joining Alec on the bed. I pull Finn’s head to my chest. “But now you’re loved, aren’t you? Who loves you more than chocolate?” I kiss him on the nose. “That’s right, I do. I love you more than anything.”

When I stand, I pin Alec’s card and the “Everything from A to Zee” menu to my wall collage, careful to place them far away from any pictures of Gregg. “How’d you get to be so thoughtful?”

“I never thought I was, really. I think you might bring out the best in me.”

I blush, bending to tousle the red fur on Finn’s head. “I have to change. I think I might stink.” I step out of my sneakers, line them up with my other shoes.

“Don’t let me stop you.”

I turn at the suggestion in his tone, a new blush already painting the rounds of my cheeks. “You mean, like, here? In front of you?”

He sits up, crosses his legs, balancing his elbows upon his knees. “Are you offering?”

My room shifts Arctic cold. I raise my arms across my chest; spy my bedroom door that’s cracked open. Part of me wishes Mom was still home. “Um, no. Definitely not.”

Alec stares at me, stares through me. He walks across the room, shoos Finn out the door before closing it. He grabs my hips from behind, presses his lips to my ear. “I would never want to make you feel uncomfortable, Zephyr. I just want to be around you. Is that okay?” He spins me to face him and the entire world falls away.

“Of course.”

He kisses me on the forehead, returns to the edge of the bed. That’s when he drops his eyes to my legs, to my thighs. “But is it weird that your legs kind of drive me bananas?”

I let my nerves release with a laugh.

“Really. They are kind of awesome.” He raises his gaze, finds my eyes. “You’re kind of awesome.” He waves me to him, wraps his arms around my waist, presses his head against my stomach. Then, almost in a whisper too quiet and personal to hear, “I didn’t see you coming.”

I bend to kiss him and his hands caress my calves, first one leg, then the other, his fingertips brushing softly over my skin, up my thighs until he stops just before the hem of my shirt. It is almost impossible to breathe.