“I can assure you that getting kissed by Gregg does not feel healthy.”
“Okay, maybe the Slice thing is bizarre, but it’ll make for a great story when we’re years away from this crap town.”
Just as she says it we look at each other, realizing maybe clearly for the first time that we won’t be together next fall. This is the part of limbo that we don’t talk about, how our individual futures don’t include each other. It physically hurts to imagine my life without Lizzie, but I never imagined my life without Gregg, and yet here it is, my life, with Gregg conspicuously absent.
Lizzie clears her throat and nods at the space behind me. I turn, my heart quickening, expecting—hoping—to see Gregg. The sun hangs directly behind the approaching silhouette but even after one short week, I know his shape, the rolling lope of his stride. Alec looks haloed in the brightness as he moves closer. I raise my hand to my forehead to shield my eyes as he peers down at me.
“Hello, Zephyr actually.”
“Hey.” I don’t have to see the smirk plastered across Lizzie’s face to know it’s there.
Alec reaches to shake Lizzie’s hand. “I’m Alec. Residential new kid.”
“Lizzie. Smartest girl in school.”
“Always a good person to know.” Alec points to the building across the courtyard. “I was on my way to meet Coach. Thought I’d say hi. Do you guys always eat out here?”
“When the weather’s nice,” Lizzie says. I see her skilled observer gaze sizing Alec up. “Why?”
“The caf’s a little overwhelming when you’ve got no one to sit with.” I find myself intrigued by his vulnerability.
“You miss your friends?” Lizzie asks.
“I miss things being familiar. It’s not easy starting at a new school senior year.”
“I’ll bet.” Lizzie gives a sympathetic nod. “But your girlfriend will visit, right? That’ll help.”
He grins. “No girlfriend.”
“That’s not the rumor going around,” Lizzie says. I nudge her on the thigh, a move Alec registers.
“Do you believe everything you hear?” Alec asks.
“No, that’s why I’m fact-checking. The story is that you got kicked out of school for snogging a girl in your dorm room.”
“Snogging?” Alec laughs.
“There are a million different words for it. Pick another, if you’d like.”
“Like I said, don’t believe everything you hear.” He gives the table a quick knock and throws me a soft smile. My stomach twitters. “I gotta run. Coach will kill me if I’m late.”
“So you made the team?” I ask.
“That’s what they tell me.”
“Congratulations,” I say.
“Thanks.” That blush deepens across his cheeks. “I only hope ice hockey is as good as field hockey in this town.” He turns to Lizzie. “It was nice meeting you.” Then, to me. “See you in French, Zephyr actually?”
I nod. “See you.”
Lizzie waves.
Alec jogs to the granite steps, takes them two at a time before disappearing into the mouth of the school.
Lizzie needles my thigh with her finger. “The new kid has a pet name for you.”
“Funny.”
“He looked pretty sincere to me.” Lizzie tosses a trio of mints into her mouth, her smile growing wider. “I don’t think it would kill you to investigate hanging out with him. He seems nice. We could all go out together, maybe. Jason will be home next weekend. What do you say?”
“Maybe.” But it’s a big maybe. I think Lizzie found something special in Jason, and there are only so many Jason and Lizzies in the world. Up until a few months ago, I thought my parents had that same kind of steel cable connection.
I raise my face to the low sun and close my eyes the way I’ve watched Lizzie do hundreds of times. I try to push away the fear of anyone watching me and relax into the wash of yellow light that paints the backs of my lids like a canvas. On it, my mind draws Alec and his smile, the way it speaks of a secret. It’s easy to be distracted by him, for sure. But then Alec morphs into my dad, grinning, happy. Popping out of his art studio with his next idea for a character from another galaxy. I dart my eyes open, fully aware of how dangerous blind faith can be.
Chapter 5
Saturday morning I hang in bed studying for my upcoming trig test. Finn seems content to lounge next to me all day, but by noon stir-craziness beats inside me fast as hummingbird wings. I can’t deal with the silent treatment from Gregg and I need to head over to his house. But first, a run. To clear my head. Prepare for The Talk I’m pretty sure we need to have.