The Forsyte Saga, Volume 3(77)

‘Nothing. She’ll understand.’

The dining-room and study doors were open. The telephone receiver still lay severed on the floor; there was no other sign of last night’s terrors.

Suddenly, Dinny said: ‘Diana, his hat and coat are gone. They were on that chair.’

Diana went into the dining-room and rang the bell. The elderly maid, coming from the basement stairs, had a scared and anxious look.

‘Have you seen Captain Ferse’s hat and coat this morning Mary?’

‘No, Ma’am.’

‘What time did you come down?’

‘Seven o’clock.’

‘You haven’t been to his room?’

‘Not yet, Ma’am.’

‘I was not well last night; I slept upstairs with Miss Dinny.’

‘Yes, Ma’am.’

They all three went upstairs.

‘Knock on his door.’

The maid knocked. Dinny and Diana stood close by. There was no answer.

‘Knock again, Mary, louder.’

Again and again the maid knocked. No answer. Diana put her aside and turned the handle. The door came open. Ferse was not there. The room was in disorder, as if someone had tramped and wrestled in it. The water bottle was empty, and tobacco ash was strewn about. The bed had been lain on, but not slept in. There was no sign of packing or of anything having been taken from the drawers. The three women looked at each other. Then Diana said:

‘Get breakfast quick, Mary. We must go out.’

‘Yes, Ma’am – I saw the telephone.’

‘Hide that up, and get it mended; and don’t tell the others anything. Just say: “He’s away for a night or two.” Make things here look like that. We’ll dress quickly, Dinny.’

The maid went downstairs again.

Dinny said: ‘Has he any money?’

‘I don’t know. I can see if his cheque book has gone.’

She ran down again, and Dinny waited. Diana came back into the hall.

‘No; it’s on the bureau in the dining-room. Quick, Dinny, dress!’

That meant… What did it mean? A strange conflict of hopes and fears raged within Dinny. She flew upstairs.





Chapter Twenty-six




OVER a hasty breakfast they consulted. To whom should they go?

‘Not to the police,’ said Dinny.

‘No, indeed.’

‘I think we should go to Uncle Adrian first.’

They sent the maid for a taxi, and set out for Adrian’s rooms. It was not quite nine o’clock. They found him over tea and one of those fishes which cover the more ground when eaten, and explain the miracle of the seven baskets full.

Seeming to have grown greyer in these few days he listened to them, filling his pipe, and at last said:

‘You must leave it to me now. Dinny, can you take Diana down to Condaford?’

‘Of course.’

‘Before you go, could you get young Alan Tasburgh to go down to that Home and ask if Ferse is there, without letting them know that he’s gone off on his own? Here’s the address.’

Dinny nodded.

Adrian raised Diana’s hand to his lips.

‘My dear, you look worn out. Don’t worry; just rest down there with the children. We’ll keep in touch with you.’

‘Will there be publicity, Adrian?’

‘Not if we can prevent it. I shall consult Hilary; we’ll try everything first. Do you know how much money he had?’

‘The last cheque cashed was for five pounds two days ago, but all yesterday he was out.’

‘How was he dressed?’

‘Blue overcoat, blue suit, bowler hat.’

‘And you don’t know where he went yesterday?’

‘No. Until yesterday he was never out at all.’

‘Does he still belong to any Club?’

‘No.’

‘Has any old friend been told of his return?’

‘No.’

‘And he took no cheque book? How soon can you get hold of that young man, Dinny?’

‘Now, if I could telephone, Uncle; he’s sleeping at his Club.’

‘Try, then.’

Dinny went out to the telephone. She soon reported that Alan would go down at once, and let Adrian know. He would ask as an old friend, with no knowledge that Ferse had ever left. He would beg them to let him know if Ferse came back, so that he might come and see him.

‘Good,’ said Adrian; ‘you have a head, my child. And now go off and look after Diana. Give me your number at Condaford.’

Having jotted it down, he saw them back into their cab.

‘Uncle Adrian is the best man in the world,’ said Dinny.

‘No one should know that better than I, Dinny.’

Back in Oakley Street, they went upstairs to pack. Dinny was afraid that at the last minute Diana might refuse to go. But she had given her word to Adrian, and they were soon on the way to the station. They spent a very silent hour and a half on the journey, leaning back in their corners, tired out. Dinny, indeed, was only now realizing the strain she had been through. And yet, what had it amounted to? No violence, no attack, not even a great scene. How uncannily disturbing was insanity! What fear it inspired; what nerve-racking emotions! Now that she was free from chance of contact with Ferse he again seemed to her just pitiful. She pictured him wandering and distraught, with nowhere to lay his head and no one to take him by the hand; on the edge, perhaps already over that edge! The worst tragedies were always connected with fear. Criminality, leprosy, insanity, anything that inspired fear in other people – the victims of such were hopelessly alone in a frightened world. Since last night she understood far better Ferse’s outburst about the vicious circle in which insanity moved. She knew now that her own nerves were not strong enough, her own skin not thick enough, to bear contact with the insane; she understood the terrible treatment of the insane in old days. It was like the way dogs had, of setting on an hysterical dog, their own nerves jolted beyond bearing. The contempt lavished on the imbecile, the cruelty and contempt had been defensive – defensive revenge on something which outraged the nerves. All the more pitiable, all the more horrible to think about. And, while the train bore her nearer to her peaceful home, she was more and more torn between the wish to shut away all thought of the unhappy outcast and feelings of pity for him. She looked across at Diana lying back in the corner opposite with closed eyes. What must she be feeling, bound to Ferse by memory, by law, by children of whom he was the father? The face under the close casque hat had the chiselling of prolonged trial – fine-lined and rather hard. By the faint movement of the lips she was not asleep. ‘What keeps her going?’ thought Dinny. ‘She’s not religious; she doesn’t believe much in anything. If I were she I should throw everything up and rush to the ends of the earth – or should I?’ Was there perhaps something inside one, some sense of what was due to oneself, that kept one unyielding and unbroken?