She’d wanted to like him. She was afraid that some part of her already did, but she needed solid reasons for feeling anything for him. But now there was nothing worth liking in him.
She was also alarmed by her growing antagonism towards the Administrators. Where had that come from?! Her father? Maybe his warning that the world was out to get her was his way of telling her a storm was approaching, but she didn’t realize she’d be the storm!
She’d never heard anyone before say anything against the Administrators, and now she stood spouting accusations which she realized, judging by the response of the captain, just may have been accurate. And, she realized with further worry, had the possibility of reaching the ears of the Administrator of Loyalty. She’d never heard of anyone in the remote northern villages ever catching his attention, but rumors abounded about his Querul-the-Third-tendencies down in Idumea. None of those rumors ever said Gadiman accomplished anything more beyond giving someone a threatening glare before another administrator pulled him away. He was their token guard dog that no one really cared for, but needed to have around anyway, just in case.
Mahrree fretted all over again that she just might come across as the first real threat.
Until she remembered the captain’s words. “ . . . a simple school teacher at the Edge of the world.” Her worries vanished, replaced by livid fury.
A simple teacher, indeed!
Well, she had to admit as the pain in her foot forced her to calm down, she was a teacher. She’d never be fancy, so she was simple. And she was in Edge.
While his words were accurate, his critical tone was meant to cut away all her confidence. But she wouldn’t let it. She may be a simple school teacher, but simple things have a way of rising up in complex ways.
She felt enraged again, a raw emotion so powerful she didn’t know what to do with it. Pacing wasn’t enough. Maybe some trees somewhere needed all the bark peeled off.
She noticed someone standing in the shadows at the end of her pacing area, and he was wearing a blue uniform. Without thinking about the next move, she hobbled over to him.
“Yes?” she asked, barely containing her disdain.
The captain’s face was calm as he smiled, which made her all the more furious.
“Are you hurt?” He nodded at her foot.
“Only temporarily. Old debating injury,” she explained bitterly.
To her surprise he grinned and held up his left hand. “I have one of those too.” He made a fist with it.
It took all of Mahrree’s remaining self-control to not make a match and show him what to do with it. His stomach was temptingly close.
His face sobered and he rubbed his forehead, near the scar above his eyebrow.
“Look, I just want you to know that I feel awful about what happened up there,” he said softly. “I lost my temper and I don’t usually do that. Well, not with women. Something about . . .” His voice trailed off. He pressed his lips together before he tried again. “I just want you to know that your mind is much like mine. This got out of control. I am sorry.”
Mahrree was stunned speechless, which was quite an accomplishment. She didn’t expect any of that, so she had nothing to retort with. Later that evening she came up with a long list of responses, and even wrote them down. But all she could manage right then was a lame, “Thank you.”
“I hope you feel better soon,” he gestured to her foot. “Apparently we’re on again in two nights.”
Mahrree’s eyes flared as he gave her a casual smile, put on his cap, and left quickly.
He’d been right, annoyingly. She had very little experience with men: they mystified her. She’d seen that behavior before in the little boys she taught. They’d have a terrible fight, hit and punch each other, then be friends again five minutes later as if the fight was part of the game.
Granted, the teenage girls were ridiculous too. They would just perceive an injustice and they’d give each other the silent treatment for an entire season.
But nothing was more astonishing than Captain Perrin Shin’s casual smile and perplexing behavior. She had heard once of a man in the village of Moorland who thought he was two different people. He even went by two different names and carried on bizarre conversations that no one could follow.
“That must be it,” Mahrree whispered to the air. “The man is not right in his mind. We are in trouble.” She laughed weakly as she started to hobble for home.
It was better than crying.
---
The new lieutenant, a young man with dark brown hair, light reddish-brown skin, and a slight but muscular build, was disappointed the captain wasn’t there to greet him. He was a bit anxious, and having the High General personally see him off yesterday morning didn’t help ease his apprehension.