I glanced over at Hudson asleep next to me. Usually we remained in constant contact while we slept. His missing warmth exacerbated the “off” feeling that still clung to me after my nightmare. Not wanting to disturb my lover, I ignored the pull to snuggle into him and instead climbed out of bed, grabbed my robe, and headed to the bathroom.
Splashing cold water on my face, I took deep breaths and tried to calm down. I’d never been prone to nightmares. Even when my parents had died, my dreams had remained sweet and calm. My obsessive mind did enough work during the waking hours—sleep wasn’t where I fleshed out my problems.
I wasn’t obsessing like I had in the past, though. And there were problems still to be worked out. Yes, I was happy and in love. But the past week had been heartbreaking and stressful with Hudson in Japan and our relationship in limbo. I’d kept secrets that I wasn’t sure he could ever completely forgive me for. And he’d betrayed me in his own ways—going behind my back to remove David as the manager of The Sky Launch. Then, the worst, he hadn’t defended me. He’d chosen to listen to the lies of his childhood friend who was playing her own game where I was the pawn.
I knew our love outweighed the heaviness of those mistakes. He proved he knew it too when he arrived at the club earlier that evening, surprising me with his declaration of commitment to our relationship. Though he still hadn’t said the three words I longed to hear, I didn’t need them. I felt his love in every fiber of my being. Felt it as he’d made love to me on the dance floor with care and attention that spoke volumes. We were together for the long run, through thick and thin—it was apparent now and with that knowledge there should be a freedom from anxiety.
Except we still hadn’t worked out all our trust issues, and that had me feeling edgy. Plus there was this video that Stacy claimed to have. What did it show? Did I want to see it? Was it simply a trick? Or was it actually significant?
It bothered me enough to make me restless and unsure. Make me obsess while I slept.
It’s nothing, I told myself. It won’t affect anything with Hudson.
But the unease that encased me said differently.
“What’s wrong?”
Hudson startled me, but the tempo of my already accelerated heartbeat barely registered the shock. I peered over my shoulder at him standing in the bathroom door. He looked as he always looked—sexy and aloof. The sight of his naked body caused my breath to intake—every time—even when thoughts of jumping him weren’t on my mind. I bit my lip as my gaze traveled down his body. Well, maybe thoughts of jumping him weren’t as far away as I’d assumed.
He came behind me, his gray eyes probing mine in the mirror. “Are you okay?”
It crossed my mind to lie, but I wasn’t doing that anymore. I’d gotten a second chance with this man, and if we were going to make things work, I’d have to be better at sharing.
I needed to tell him about Stacy’s video.
And I would. But I needed a few minutes to regroup. “I just had a bad dream, and now I can’t sleep.”
His brow creased with worry. “Want to talk about it?”
I shook my head. Then changed my mind. “Yes. But later.”
“Hmm.” He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed my head. “How about I get a hot bath going for you in the meantime?”
“That sounds heavenly.”
He let me go and started to the task. I leaned against the shower stall as Hudson bent over the large soaker tub and turned on the faucets. It was impossible not to admire his hard body, not to want to lick along the muscles of his abs, to bite the tight curve of his ass.
He glanced up at me. “Those are naughty thoughts clouding those brown eyes.”
My lips curved up into what I hoped was a suggestive grin. “Are you joining me?”
“In the naughty thoughts or in the tub?”
I swatted at his luscious behind. “The tub.”
“I’ll join you in both.” It was three in the morning on a weeknight. He had work in the morning. And the man had jet lag from a week overseas. But he never faltered at caring for me. He was always there. Even when I kicked him away to Japan, he still made sure I was looked after—sending his sister to check in, calling the doorman to deliver messages. When would I stop being surprised by his attention?
Never. That’s when.
I undid my robe and hung it on a wall hook, enjoying the lust in Hudson’s gaze as I stood naked before him. I stuck a toe in to test the heat. The water was perfect—almost too hot, just like I liked it. I stepped in and leaned forward so that Hudson could slide in behind me. It dawned on me that we’d never bathed together. How could it feel like we’d been through everything yet there was so much we had left to experience? It was a comforting thought—to realize that we were still only in the new, that we could look forward to more.