I beg you to come with me. If you remain where you are, I believe you will be in great peril, with your life at risk.
Travel with the monastic posts; they are swift and will offer you protection. I will await your arrival and hide you until our departure.
May Saint Christopher keep you safe on the sinful perils of the road. God bless you.
Brother Edward Grim.”
Theodosia lowered the page. Edward’s neat script proclaimed his anguish at what had taken place; his holy grief leapt from the paper, burrowed into her heart. “How he blames himself for the sin of others. No one could have stopped that attack. No one.”
“I blame myself far more than Brother Edward.” Frustration burned in Benedict’s dark eyes. “He’s only a monk. I’m a knight. I had a sword. Had I not been a fool, I could have done something. And Archbishop Becket might still be alive.”
“Thanks to your protection, Sister Theodosia is still alive,” said the Abbess, “and Sister Amélie has her guardian angel in Brother Edward Grim. We cannot change the sins or omissions of the past, much as we’d like, Sir Palmer. But what we can do is make amends, make restitution. What do you propose to do?”
Benedict went to the window, broad shoulders framed against the light. “Mother, Theodosia and I have been hounded for our lives by Reginald Fitzurse. Sister Amélie has been in mortal danger too. We know Archbishop Becket was murdered for that secret, whatever that is.”
The Abbess shook her head. “I know not.”
Benedict gestured to the convent buildings outside. “Theodosia, I know this is your world, a world you’re desperate to return to.”
Return to order, calm, silence. Peace. Holiness. Her vocation, her life. “I am.” So why did her reply sound so weak?
“But?” said Mother Ursula.
“But we still don’t know why all of this has happened,” said Benedict. “Brother Edward seeks an answer too, by going to bear witness to the King. We, as the other Canterbury witnesses, should go too. It’s the only way to finish this.”
Go back out into the sinful world again. But a world where she might find Mama. She steeled herself against her longing. She should not let her ten-year-old heart rule. Benedict ran a broad hand through his dark hair as he looked out the window again. Nor her nineteen-year-old one. Her place was in here, not with him. Nor any man. “You can go, Benedict. You do not need me.”
He turned back to her and Mother Ursula. “As far as Edward knows, I’m one of the murderers, one of your abductors. If he sees me alone in Southampton, he’ll run a mile. Or, from what I’ve seen of him, have me arrested and executed as fast as he can. Am I right, Theodosia?”
“Brother Edward has a steely reputation for righteousness,” she replied.
Ursula raised her eyebrows. “In a monk, that’s a fearsome quality.” She laid a hand on Theodosia’s arm. “My child, I swear to you, I wouldn’t send you or any other soul to harm. But a terrible storm of evil descended on you out of nowhere. Unless you and Sir Palmer find your answers and put an end to this once and for all, who’s to say it will not happen again?”
Her words sparked Theodosia’s earlier fears back into life. “You think Fitzurse is still alive. Both of you.”
“From what you’ve both said — indeed, from what you’ve not said — that may be true,” said Ursula. “But who’s to say he needs to be? You can cut and cut at a serpent’s tail. Unless you sever the head, it can still devour you.”
“Wise words, Mother,” said Benedict.
Ursula released Theodosia’s arm with a squeeze. “Then go after Sister Amélie to Southampton. There may still be time to find her before she sails to France.”
“When is the feast of Saint Theodosius?” said Benedict.
Theodosia allowed herself a small smile. “I know that at once, for he is one of my patrons. It’s in four days’ time.”
Ursula nodded. “It is indeed. Maybe the blessed saint himself is showing you the way.”
Benedict clenched a fist. “Then we can do it. I swear to you.”
The Abbess clapped him on the back. “I was a witness to that. Now, to your horses, both of you. Order them saddled up. I’ll go and find that serving girl of mine, and she can pack you up enough food for the journey. Clean clothes too.”
Theodosia held up Edward’s letter. “What should I do with this? Should we take it with us?”
Benedict walked from the window with a shrug. “Throw it away if you like. Doesn’t matter now we’ve read it.”