Reading Online Novel

The Exception(65)



“Oh, Cane, I’m so sorry! That must have been awful! Were you an only child?” I suddenly felt very alone for Cane. I couldn’t imagine being by myself in the world. Even through my divorce and my feelings of loneliness then, it couldn’t compare to what Cane had to feel.

“Yeah, just me,” he shrugged, moving his enchilada around on his plate.

“Did you ever see your mother again?”

He shook his head. “Nah, she married the guy she left Dad for and had some other kids. Or so I heard.”

My heart broke for this strong man in front of me that, in that moment, looked so mortal. I knew he was trying to hide what he was feeling, but I could see the memories cross through his eyes.

“I lost my mother when I was fourteen,” I said quietly. “She was pregnant but didn’t know. She had an ectopic pregnancy and bled to death before my dad found her. So I understand what you feel like. I know how it feels to lose your mom, Cane.”

He sat his fork down on his plate, staring at me. He didn’t move for a few moments and then began to speak. “She left when I was really young, maybe five or six. I don’t have a whole lot of memories of her.” He looked out across the desert. “I do remember waking up one morning and she was gone, though. I kept thinking she was going to come back. I sat outside with my little Tonka trucks for days, pushing the sand one way and then pushing it the other. I’d jump up every time I heard a car, knowing it was going to be her.” He dragged his eyes back to mine and shook his head. “Dad carried me inside every night as the sun went down, kicking and screaming. I’d climb into my bed and bury myself in my Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles sheets and cry myself to sleep.”

“That breaks my heart, Cane.”

“Don’t let it. What you went through was much worse. A whole different scale entirely. You probably loved your mother.”

“And I’m sure you loved yours, too,” I said softly. I wondered if Cane’s mother had loved him. How could she if she left him? But how could she not? I imagined a mini-Cane with messy blond hair, mischievous eyes, and his playful smirk. How would you not love that?

I thought back to my mother and how much she loved Kari and me. I couldn’t fathom her willingly walking out of our lives. Even though I wasn’t with her when she died, I knew she would have been fighting to stay with us. She loved us with everything she had.

“My mom is a coldhearted bitch. I could never love someone like that. For a very long time, I wasn’t sure I could ever love anyone again.” He grinned.

I wasn’t sure if I should read into that, so I chose to ignore the last part of his statement. “But she was your mother. I’m sure you loved her then. Maybe not now.”

“I don’t love her now. I’m not capable of loving her now.”

“You’re capable of a lot more than I think you realize,” I smiled.

“Not that. She doesn’t exist to me anymore. The secret of moving on is to focus your energy on the future and not on the past. She’s the past. And I’m too busy looking ahead to remember her.”

“I love it that you told me about your family. I’m sure you don’t like to talk about it.”

“Yeah,” he said, picking up his napkin and wadding it into a ball. “I don’t talk about this shit. It worries me that I find myself running off at the mouth when you’re around.”

He smiled slowly at me and I got up, walked around the table, and sat on his lap, running my hands through his hair. I tugged his head back lightly and kissed him.

“Well, I like that you find yourself telling me things.” I kissed him on the top of his head. “You know, I like to think my life is kind of like the books I read, only I’m the author. I can write the story I want. The future can be anything I want it to be.”

He moved his head side to side, considering my words. “That works, as long as your story has a blond stud that fucks like an animal.”

“Well, he’s blond …” His lips covered mine and all thoughts of anything but Cane vanished.





JADA

“I’d like to show you one more thing, if you don’t have to get home,” Cane said, as we got back into the SUV. I buckled my seatbelt.

Cane laughed as he watched me click the latch in place. “Is that a hint?”

“Maybe,” I winked. “But no—I don’t have to get home. I’d love to see whatever you would like to show me.”

Since the topic of his parents came up, Cane had been a little quieter than usual and I didn’t push.

Surely he realized it would come up if he brought me here.