He shook his head and laughed. “And Farthingale women are the snoopiest women I’ve ever met. You were leaning so far off that bale of hay, straining so hard to catch a word, I was certain you’d tumble off it.”
She blushed. “True, but we snoop with the best of intentions. How can I help you if you won’t tell me what’s wrong? I love you, Ian.” Oh, crumpets! “Oh, dear. Did I just say that?” She let out a little eep.
His expression softened. “You did. Care to say it again?”
She eeped again. Honestly! What was wrong with her? She’d just taken down two assailants without so much as a hitch in her breath. But now, she was in full blush, her tongue thickening in fear, and she couldn’t seem to stop eeping. “I didn’t mean to let it slip out, but it’s no secret. You must know how I feel about you. I do love you, Ian.”
“Which makes me doubt your sanity.” He cast her a wry grin, but there was such turmoil in his expression that it tugged at her heart. He was a damaged soul, unable to believe that anyone could care for him, and if someone ever did care, then something awful was bound to happen.
“I suppose that’s why you call me Daffy.” She maintained her smile, wanting to keep their conversation as casual as possible, even though she’d just exposed her heart and had no illusions about the chaos her words were causing him.
Nor did she expect Ian to take her into his arms and profess his undying love for her. Still, she was disappointed that he’d simply made a jest of it and now looked like he’d rather be anywhere but here beside her. She was not going to force him to say more, for affection and caring were new sensations to him and he must find them overwhelming. “I’m not the only one who’s a little out of sorts right now,” she said. “You’re rather a shambles at the moment, too. What did those men tell you?”
He drew away and moved to stand beside the hearth, resting his arm on the mantel as he gazed into the flames. “They just confirmed what I already suspected.”
“Which is...” she prompted when he didn’t immediately continue. She was afraid to push too hard, for he might walk out and she was in no condition to chase after him. Her race to the stable to save him had sapped her strength and been quite enough excitement for one day.
He remained silent, still staring into the fire. She took the opportunity to study him while he appeared distracted. That look in his eyes... so haunted and angry. He was capable of murder. Was he actually contemplating it? “You know who ordered the attack, don’t you?”
He nodded.
She shoved out of her chair to hobble to his side and wrap her arms around him. “You can tell me anything. I’ll keep it in confidence, which is saying quite a lot since Farthingales never keep their mouths shut. But you know I can. Please let me help. Please don’t run away from me.”
He arched an eyebrow in surprise. “Why would I run from you?”
She eased back to study his face. His torment was still evident on his handsome features. That was quite something, she realized with a start, for Ian wasn’t trying to hide his feelings from her. Quite the opposite, he was allowing her to see into his heart. For Ian, that was as close to an admission of love as he was capable of giving. “I don’t know. You’re the one who said you had to leave.”
“Among other things, in order to obtain the special license and engage the minister. I’ll bring him back here to perform our wedding ceremony. I’m not wasting any more time on courtship. Not that I’ve spent a whit of time properly courting you.”
“And not that I care a whit about it either. I’ve accepted the fact that we’ll never do anything the ordinary way. I can’t wait to meet Felicity and make the three of us a family.” But he’d said “among other things,” and that was the part that worried her. What else did he intend to do before he returned with the special license and the minister?
“Felicity will love you at first sight,” he said, stroking a finger across her cheek as he cast her a tender smile.
“As I’ll love her.” She sighed and shook her head. “Mother will be disappointed. Five daughters and not a decent courtship among them. Lily’s wedding was a beautiful affair, though. I suppose my mother will have to be satisfied with that. I’ll ask her to throw us a party. She’ll enjoy planning it. Aunt Julia will help. Thank you for wanting to marry me, Ian. I don’t think I could ever love anyone but you. In truth, I know I couldn’t.”
She paused a moment, hoping he might return the compliment. “It’s quite fortunate matters worked out the way they did,” she continued, swallowing her disappointment when he kept silent, “except for those attacks on your life, of course. Those were terrible. I’m glad you weren’t hurt this time. I’ll stop rambling now.”