Was this how it felt to love someone?
Because he did. Because he wanted Eleni’s happiness above all else. He couldn’t bear the thought of the future without her but neither could he live with her, knowing that her heart would forever belong to another. Knowing that he had selfishly stolen her happiness from her.
“Gabriel? When did you return?”
He turned to see Eleni walk toward him in the sitting room, a shaky smile on her face. Her eyes looked dull, bruised, the remnants of her tears still on them.
“Just an hour ago. I had to sign some documents for my assistant.”
She reached him, and then registering his tense pose, a wariness filled her eyes. “I... I’ve been waiting to see you.”
“Why?” he asked abruptly, his heart crawling into her throat.
She took his hands into hers, turned them over and kissed the knuckles. “I... I wanted to thank you for my gift.” When he frowned, she sighed. “The Thoroughbred? Angelina spilled the beans, and he and I have already become friends. I’m already a little in love with him.” She rose up on her toes and kissed his lips. Only he shifted in the last moment and her lips landed on his jaw.
He nodded, then cleared his throat. But for the life of him, he didn’t know what to say to her. It was unbearable to be her husband, to steal the intimacy she gave so willingly when in truth she might wish it on another man.
He hated this power she had over him, hated how weak she made him. How she made him want to put his happiness in her hands, how she made the future without her look like an unending abyss.
A nervous laugh fell from her mouth, pulling her attention to him. “Gabriel, is everything all right?”
“Eleni...did you see Spiros again?”
Eleni blinked. “I... Gabriel...”
“Just answer the question, Princesa.”
The harsh note in his tone made her flinch. But she nodded, dread curling up in her chest. This morning, she’d been planning to pour her heart out to him. Now she was afraid to look into his eyes. Afraid that all she would see were distance and indifference.
“Yes, I did. Just an hour ago, in fact. He... Gabriel, it was a conversation he and I needed to have. I needed to see him one last time.” Anger flooded her, a much better emotion than the fear stealing up her throat. “You can’t believe that I’m having some supersecret affair with him right under your nose. If you think that, you’re a—”
“No, I believe you, Princesa. What I want to know is if he told you. What your father had done.”
“Yes, he did.” Tears filled her eyes again. But she didn’t grieve over herself. She felt sad for her father, who had only sought to control and manipulate his children and not love them. She felt sad for Spiros, who was a good man, and who had become a pawn in that game. “But you already made me tough, Gabriel. You already opened my eyes to what he’d been.”
“So that’s it? You’re over him now?”
“It’s all in the past, Gabriel. I vowed to be your wife, a mother to Angelina. And I’ve never broken my promise to anyone. Not to my father, not to Spiros, not to Andreas, and I’ll definitely not do that to you or Angelina. For better or worse.”
Gabriel had never wanted to hear those damn words out of her mouth ever again. It felt as if he couldn’t breathe, as if a part of him was being wrenched away. Like there was already a hole in his chest.
He could not do it anymore. He couldn’t live with her knowing that she wanted another man, another future. “There’s nothing more in this marriage for either of us, is there?”
“What? What are you talking about?”
“Angelina and I understand each other. But still, I would ask that you not terminate our marriage too soon. I’ll leave Drakon within the next day. Angelina will stay here with you.”
If she had shown a hint of pain, Gabriel would have taken her in his arms. Would have kept her chained to his side. But his wife’s mask was back in place. Only the paleness of her face said he’d just ended their marriage.
Eleni had been taught again and again to place someone else’s needs above her own. To keep her word, no matter what.
It would take time but she would see why he had to do this. Why he was ripping out his own heart.
“Why are you doing this?” She ran a hand over her tummy, as if to protect herself. “Gabriel, I don’t even understand what you’re doing.”
“I’m freeing you, Princesa, letting you go.” He took her face in his hands, unable to resist touching her. “I should never have threatened you in the first place. Never agreed to your counterproposal. You have given me and Angelina enough of your life.
“You’re free to pursue whatever, whoever you want. Whatever future you like.”
“If this is Andreas’s doing, I swear I will rip him apart with my bare hands. Don’t do this, Gabriel. This is not right.”
“It is right, Princesa. The only right thing. The longer we continue this farce, the more I will end up hurting you. How you will convey this to Angelina and not hurt her, I will leave in your capable hands. You see, Princesa, I trust you completely. I trust you more than I ever have anyone in my life.”
He didn’t wait to see what she’d say. He walked out of the Princess of Drakon’s life, before she took everything he had.
CHAPTER TWELVE
THE WEEKS FOLLOWING Gabriel’s departure were the worst of Eleni’s life. Even the cruelest days spent with her father, listening to him rage, struggling to calm him until her arms ached—they were still better than the desolation Gabriel left in his wake.
To the outward world, and thankfully for Angelina, nothing had changed. Somehow, Eleni had convinced the little girl that her father had urgent business that would take months, while leaving the window open for her that she could visit him whenever she wanted.
While Angelina hadn’t been completely fooled, she’d decided to play along, for now.
Eleni apparently didn’t have the same composure the little girl did. She had confronted Andreas, argued with him, called him names for playing God with her life, sobbed all over him, which had then resulted in a huge row between Nik and Andreas.
It had taken a hugely pregnant Mia to calm her brothers down. And at the end of it, Eleni didn’t feel even a little better.
Just that same sense of missing a vital piece of herself.
She was six weeks along now, and hiding it with baggy tunics, she still hadn’t told a soul. It was his right to know first and however furious he had made her, she still couldn’t take that away from Gabriel.
He called every night to talk to Angelina while Eleni sat there, pathetically waiting for him to ask for her, pretending to Angelina that she’d already spoken to him. When Spiros had tried to comfort her, she had asked him to leave.
She’d already messed up his life, thanks to her father.
Every cell in her wanted to tell Gabriel about the baby. She knew without a doubt that if anything could bring him back to her, it would be the news of her pregnancy. If he found out that he was going to be a father again, he would bind her to him.
But she didn’t want him like that. She didn’t want his pity, and neither did she want his duty. She didn’t want to be a wife to him if he didn’t love her.
Not even for him could she live like that again.
* * *
Gabriel walked out onto the acreage behind the stables, looking for his wife.
Stunned, he came to a standstill.
Eleni was riding the huge Thoroughbred, the same beast he had bought for her, astride, through a path cordoned off from the viewing point where he stood. It had been only a few weeks since he had given the horse to her.
Had she already tamed him?
Gabriel’s heart jumped into his throat as he saw her urge the horse toward an obstacle course that did not look remotely easy.
His heart stayed in his throat as she jumped each obstacle as if it were a child’s game. Not once did she lose her seating on the huge beast. Not once did she lose the focus or the mastery with which she ruled him.
It was almost as if the Thoroughbred and she were soul mates, so easily did the proud beast respond to her. She crouched low over him, whispering commands. Gabriel’s pulse sped up dangerously as she crouched low and took the final obstacle with a flourish he had only seen in professional jumpers.
The jumping circuit was clearly a piece of cake for her.
Slowly his heartbeat returned to normal and Gabriel wondered again if he would ever stop being surprised by her. Ever stop wanting her with that soul-wrenching intensity.
Waiting to see what she would do had been torture. After his daughter had told him Ellie’s old friend had left forever—his daughter had the makings of a spy—waiting in Barcelona to finish dealing with his mother and the aftermath of twenty years of estrangement had been torment.
He waited on the other side of the fence as she jumped off the horse, and then whispered near its ear for long, lingering minutes. If he hadn’t seen her take that obstacle course, he wouldn’t have believed it now.
The beast seemed huge next to her. She looked fragile, almost breakable, just as she had been in his arms.
He followed a few steps behind her as she led the horse to his stall.
She still hadn’t noticed him; she was so immersed in the simple task of grooming the beast. She dismissed the groom, and then filled a trough with oats and water.