“I know.”
Erik turned her around, placed a hand under her chin and searched her face. “Why are you crying?”#p#分页标题#e#
She sniffled, not answering.
“Tell me.”
Michelle was sure he understood what had just happened in that room, yet he wanted her to say it again. “I can’t.”
“Tell me,” he whispered in a tormented plea.
“Okay, it’s true. I love you! I don’t care if Danielle thought she was talking to Felicia. I was speaking from my heart. I meant every word. I love you, Erik. I love you, and I want to marry you and have your babies.”
“Oh, Michelle, my sweet, sweet Michelle.” Erik clasped her to him, his heart flipping erratically in his big chest. He felt her hot tears soaking into his shirt, scorching his flesh.
Michelle loved him, and she wanted to have his babies.
He groaned. God, how he wished he could tell her that he loved her, too. But he was not at liberty to do so. He was still battling with guilt, especially after what his mother had told him about Cassie. She had died so cruelly, cut down in the prime of her life. How could he love another woman before he avenged her death?
He was torn between loyalty for a dead woman’s memory and the burning passion in his soul for one who was very much alive, and who was now crying in his arms because he couldn’t tell her that he loved her.
Michelle pushed away from him. “I’m sorry.” With trembling fingers, she tried to press the wrinkles from his tear-soaked shirt.
Erik captured her fingers in his hands and held them against his chest. “Michelle, I don’t want you to be sorry. I appreciate your honesty, but you have to understand my predicament. I told you this morning that I’m not ready for this kind of commitment. Honestly, I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready to fully commit again. There are issues I have to resolve, questions I need answered before I can open my heart to another woman. I don’t want to hurt you.”
She gazed at him through teary eyes. “I understand. And I’m sorry. This is a difficult time for you. Your mother is dying. Your daughter is confused, and—”
“I’m the one who’s sorry for pulling you into my topsy-turvy world. It’s very selfish of me. I should have waited before I—”
She placed a finger to his lips and gave him a trembling smile. “I’m not afraid of topsy-turvy. I’ve lived it all my life. Your topsy-turvy world is a lot better than the one I came from. And you couldn’t have pulled me in if I didn’t want to be pulled in, Erik.”
Erik threaded his fingers through her short silky hair then trailed the back of his hand along her cheek. “You’re too good. Too understanding.”
“That’s love.”
“I just need time. That’s all.”
She uttered a shaky laugh. “You have four years and eleven months.”
“God, I hope it doesn’t take that long.” He looked about him and his gaze settled on the bed in the center of the room. He suddenly felt exhausted, both physically and emotionally.
“Is this your bedroom?” Michelle asked with a ‘need-to-know’ look in her eyes.
“Yes. This is where I spent my childhood. Most of it.” He reached behind her and locked the door. “Come lie down with me for a little bit.”
“You think that’s a good idea? I mean with the way we feel about each other?”
“Do you trust me?”
“Yes.”
“Then trust that I will respect you. As much as I want to, I’m not going to make love to you, Michelle. I just want to hold you close to me.”
“But Precious—”
“Dad and the staff will take care of her. We’ve been going all day. I just need a little quiet right now. No more conversation about anything, okay? Just let your mind relax and go wherever it wants to go, and let your heart feel whatever it wants to feel. But don’t say a word.” He put a finger to his lips. “Shh.”#p#分页标题#e#
Michelle nodded and let him lead her over to the bed. She watched as he kicked his sandals off then knelt on the carpet and lifted her feet from hers with warm skillful hands. Except for Robert, no man had ever shown her such gentleness, such simple caring. Her heart swelled within her.
He stood up, pulled back the blue and white comforter and eased down on his side in the middle of the bed. He reached out his hand and pulled her gently down next to him, facing him. He smiled into her eyes then clasped his hand at the back of her head and pressed her face into the hollow of his neck.
He smelled wonderful, she thought, as his arms and legs wrapped around her and he tucked her into the strong warmth of his body, fitting them together perfectly. His arousal was evident, and even though her heart was beating out of control, the intense anxiety for sex wasn’t there. Instead, she felt a deep satisfying peace wash over her. He was like a drug.