"Right. That's fine. But what are your thoughts on matters as they stand right now?"
What was the deal with these doctors? They were so impatient, so pushy. Not for the first time I wished that I had found some way to feel the possibility of vindication without having to join forces with Dr. George Johnson.
There were several reasons for my hesitation on the matter. The first was probably unfair, and that was the simple fact that he was a doctor. When I was a little girl I looked at doctors as something between men and gods. I think most children do. I honestly believed that they could fix anything, do anything with their extreme knowledge and ability. Part of me believed that even when I grew up, right up until David Wyatt let my sister die. He was the one who had promised that medicine would make her better and instead he had just killed her. Once a person was disillusioned in that kind of a way, trusting any doctor was pretty much out of the question.
The other major reason for my hesitation about Dr. Johnson was how vehemently he seemed to hate Dr. Wyatt. I couldn't understand it. I knew why I wanted to infiltrate the Wyatt home. I wanted some kind of proof that David's negligence had killed my sister. I needed that proof. It felt like the only chance I had to move on and have some kind of life.
But why the hell was Dr. Johnson so dead set on bringing David Wyatt down? Sure, he insisted that it was to serve "the greater good." His words, not mine. He wanted me to be content with that, and for all he knew I was. In reality, I wasn't buying it. He believed that because he was a doctor and I was not, I would believe anything he said. I may not have been a doctor, but I also wasn't an idiot. He was hell bent on getting David fired and it had nothing to do with helping me get closure. He had a vendetta, the motivation for which was all for himself.
"My thoughts are that it's going to take more than just a couple of days to get the kind of information we're going to need to prove anything. You're going to have to be more patient than this. I can't do this with you breathing down my neck all of the time. I don't like it. It makes me nervous and that only makes everything that much harder. Okay?"
"Sure, that's fine. That makes sense. But you will keep me informed?"
"You know I will."
"Good. That's good. You need to remember what we're doing this for. That man, he's a bad doctor. He's hiding something and I truly believe it is an addiction. Not only that, but I would bet my life on that addiction being the reason for your sister's death. Don't you want him to pay?"
"Yes," I whispered, tears of anger and sorrow springing into my eyes. It wasn't fair for him to say this kind of thing to me. I already knew all of this. I didn't need him throwing it all back into my face.
"And so he shall. When we're done with him he will most certainly have his medical license revoked. That may very well be the least of his problems. When this whole thing is over and done Mr. Wyatt will be very lucky if he hasn't landed himself in prison. Remember that. Keep your eye on the prize and your head in the game."
"Right. I will."
I hung up the phone quickly. The conversation was leaving a bad taste in my mouth and I didn't want to have it anymore. I did want David to be held responsible for what he had done, but for the first time I started to think about what it would mean. If he lost his license and lost his job, if he was really thrown in prison for god's sake, what would happen to Sophie?
I didn't have any idea where her mother was but I had never seen her and I had never heard the vaguest mention of her. If David Wyatt was no longer in the picture, would she show up to pick up the slack? And if not, where would Sophie wind up? The last place on the planet I wanted to see that precious little thing was in the foster care system. I couldn't think of anything that would take the light right out of her faster than that would.
I flopped back on my new bed and tried very hard not to think about that. If I could manage to keep my thought all squarely on Nikki and the life that had been taken away from her through David's arrogance I thought I would be okay. It was time to shut off my bleeding heart and focus on the thing I needed. And I felt like I really did need it. Needed it to survive.
"Nikki would be proud."
Dr. Johnson had said that to me when I first agreed to help him take David down. He had said it with a sugary sweet sincerity in his voice that I couldn't help but read as false. I had wanted to believe it, to believe that what he was saying was true, and part of me still believed it. If I didn't I wouldn't have gone so far. I quit my job for Christ's sake. That was dedication. But now that everything had slowed down for a moment and I had time to rest, to think, I started to think about Nikki and what she would actually think if she knew what I was doing.
Could she see me? Was she up there somewhere looking down on every move I made? And if she was, was she proud or was she appalled? Nikki had always been wholly good, much sweeter than I could ever help to be. I had this tiny little voice in the back of my head telling me now that this was not what she would have wanted. It made me feel a little bit crazy, to tell the truth. It split my head in two so that I could not determine which version of things was most likely to be true. It was important to know the truth. It would mean everything for what my course of action should really be.
"I'm going to have to get to know him."
Looking with blind eyes at the ceiling above me, I whispered those words to myself. I knew it was just a whisper, but it felt a lot more like a scream. I didn't want to get to know him. I wanted him to stay the asshole guy whose impatience and hubris had gotten my sister killed. My little Nikki. But the thing was, he was already more than that asshole guy. Now he had a house and a little girl who liked The Wizard of Oz just like I did when I was small. I couldn't set out to destroy him without a second thought because, even if I had already lost so much, he was a man who also had a lot to lose. How do you just destroy a family without making sure the patriarch deserves it?
So yes, I would get to know him, even if it hurt. I would get to know him but I would also keep my eyes and ears open for anything out of the ordinary. I was a pretty observant girl and if there was anything off about David, I would find it.
A person couldn't hide what they were all of the time, even a person as intelligent as David Wyatt. If he really was responsible for Nikki's passing the way that Dr. Johnson and I believed he might be, I would find the proof. God help me, I would find the proof and I would expose him and let the chips fall where they may.
I sat up slowly, as tired as I was, and made my way to the window of my charming little bedroom. It really was charming, and the little window seat was the perfect place for me to sit and calm my nerves, maybe read a book. I thought about all of those books lining David's massive bookcases and wondered which one was his favorite. I wondered if he had a favorite anything, anything at all.
Chapter Three
Kayla
"Are those foods? You got food things in there?"
I smiled widely and turned to greet my little charge. She couldn't quite say her r's yet, which made her delivery all the cuter. I kneeled down on the ground again, something that she had quickly come to expect of me, and welcomed the still sleepy Sophie into my waiting arms. It was amazing how much a person that small could make you feel in such a short amount of time.
At only four years old Sophie's capacity for love was still infinite and it made it all that much easier to love her back. And it didn't hurt that she was one hundred percent adorable, without having to try at all, all of the time.
Take now, for instance. She wore a long, faded Star Wars shirt that was long enough to be an evening gown on her and clutched a bright pink towel around her neck just like a cape. I loved her constant juxtaposition between the extreme girly and the epic dude movies that everyone knew and loved. She was entirely her own person, with no apologies and a curiosity that drove her question absolutely everything around her.
Looking at her now, I brushed her thoroughly messy blonde hair out of her face and gave her a little kiss on the forehead. She beamed up at me with eyes full of undying loyalty and need, smiled, then said, "Again."