When I pull it out and see the name on the Caller ID my heart sinks.
It’s the nursing home calling.
Fuck. Not right now, not right now…
That thought is followed immediately by a sickening rush of shame. My mother cannot help what’s happening to her. This is no time to be concerned with my own convenience.
What I have to say to Cate can wait.
I hope.
Peter is still waiting next to the car, and I turn and head back down the steps to the plane, waving him over as I answer the call.
“Hunter.”
“Mr. Hunter, this is Angelica from Brookside. I’m calling because we’ve had a medical emergency involving your mother that necessitated a transfer to Mount Sinai—”
I cut her off. “Is she all right?”
“As far as I know, her condition is still serious.”
“I’ll be there as soon as I can.” I disconnect the call. “Mount Sinai. Right now, Peter. I’m going to make some calls on the way. I need you to cancel the flight.”
“Of course.”
In ten seconds we’re speeding away from LaGuardia, my heart in my throat. I have to get through to my mother’s doctors and find out exactly what the hell is happening.
I just hope I get there in time.
By the time I walk into my mother’s room at Mount Sinai, she’s resting peacefully against her pillow, looking haggard and somehow much older than the last time I saw her. Every time time I see her like this it guts me all over again. She should have so many happy years left ahead of her.
The doctors briefed me in the hallway before I got here, but their words seemed to slide in one ear and out the other even as they were speaking. Something about organ failure, which sounds pretty fucking terrible if you ask me, but the main idea is that she’s still alive and her condition is stable…for the moment.
I needed to see her. I couldn’t take it all in.
I’ll meet with them later to go over it all again, figure out what the next steps are.
The moment I see my mother’s eyes, I’m flooded with relief.
She knows who I am.
“Hi, Mom,” I say, sitting down on the doctor’s stool next to her bed and taking her hand in mine.
“Jax.”
“How are you feeling?”
“I’ve been better.” She gives me a wan smile, her eyes sparkling a little. “Some hospital, isn’t it?”
“The best in the city. Only the best for you, Mom.”
Her smile widens a little. “You’re a good son.”
“I don’t know about that.”
“The best son.”
“I’m your only son.”
We both laugh, and I squeeze her hand.
“What’s this I hear about your organs, Mom? Have you not been taking care of them?”
Her face turns serious. “I do try my best, Jax. But I’m not always myself these days.”
“You are right now.”
“I am right now,” she agrees, then sighs. “We haven’t had a chance to talk.”
“You can just rest, if you want. I don’t have any news.”
“No? What happened to that nice girl you were seeing? Lydia?”
I can’t remember ever telling my mother about dating a girl named Lydia, but suddenly I’m overtaken by the urge to tell her about Cate.
“Actually, I was seeing a different girl. Her name is Cate, and she’s…” There’s so much to say about her, but I have no idea how much time I have before my mother’s gone again. “She’s incredible.”
“Well, she’d have to be, in order to be enough for you. What happened to her?”
“What do you mean?”
“You said you were seeing someone. Did she leave you?”
“Yes.” There’s no time for anything but honesty now.
“Why, Jax? What did you do?”
“What makes you think it was my fault?” I try to grin at my mother even as my smile falters.
“I know you.” Her tone is soft but serious.
“Okay,” I say. “I’ll admit it. I tried to…” How can I explain this? Every time I tell someone else what I did, I sound like more and more of a psycho. “I tried to have her job changed. It’s a long story, but the stress was really eating her alive…anyway, the company she worked for let her go before I had the chance to tell her what my plan was.”
“Oh, Jax.” My mom purses her lips, frowning at me, and I’m newly ashamed of what I did. “I hope you apologized.”
“She didn’t want to hear it.”
“But you need her to.” I can’t hide anything from her. Even now, when her mind is in the process of deserting her completely, she can read my face like an open book.